Faithinstrangers19:
Chatting to a girl recently who told me how she gets 20+ messages per day from guys despite her not being an attention whore for lack of better terms.
It made me think about just how uneven the gender ratio seems to be here.
It’s massively skewed on dating apps as well but I wonder why this kink appears to be more common among men?
Maybe a bunch of guys here don’t actually have the kink and are just hoping to get lucky in an “easier” domain?
What do you guys think?
Jiggle Junkie:
messaging ≠ active in a community
From my vantage point of watching the online segment of the fatosphere since the 1990s, while there may be more men, it’s not a massive skew.
What is a massive skew—and has nothing to do with fat attraction—is supply and demand of men vs. women, esp. in a heteronormative context. Not only are behaviors different, as mentioned by becomingoverweight, western societies define and judge women by attractiveness and sex appeal, and value them highly as sex objects. Show up to an online community as a woman and watch your message box blow up, just by existing. With that kind of stifling pressure, is it any wonder that women take breaks/back away/walk away from individual online interactions?
Over in MenLand, where i’ve more or less existed all these years, one can have months or years of no activity in the private message box. We still have a lot of the paradigm that men are supposed to pursue and women are supposed to filter. For those of us who aren’t wired to pursue (looks in the mirror), it’s difficult. I’m actually finding it easier to work towards a mild gender transition (with dreams of eventual autoerotica) easier than making an intimate connection with anyone.
Ace of spadez:
This is what I feel and I don’t like it. It’s transition because of depravity not because I want to. I’m so tired and accustomed to being alone I feel like just buying sex dolls with the bodies I like and feminizing my body is better than trying to connect with these females who either ignore u , block u or only want to spend your money to gain.
The tiny percentage of women who are still looking for a true connection are few are far between , the pool of available partners is even smaller because it seems there is no one in my area into this kink and I end up chatting with someone 3 billion light years away. Men do not receive the same attention but are called on extensively to financially support a female. It always interesting wen women want want u have but not who u are. That’s what I see in this community.
There are more women interested in other women and what they can get from men rather than trying to actually get to know them and show them affection. Vice versus there are guys on here who simply want to exploit women for the bodies , fuck them and throw them away by using them to cum and then never speaking to them again.
Between those women jaded by love , the worthless men and women who wish to use each other and the women overwhelmed by attention most decent men just look at women they can’t get , get ignored by the women they communicate with and resort to self sexual gratification or they say fuck it I’ll try being bi or gay. Or they just marinate in loneliness, forever masturbating to women on a screen.
Truth is, our society does teach folks to be overtly narcissistic and solipsistic but one has to have an abundance mindset when dealing with this. I work as a stage manager for artists like G Herbo, Saving Alexandria and groups like that and when you do venues with no less than five thousand people you realize that there are plenty of people who like what you like. When I was in my twenties, I felt like I was the only one who liked things like our fetish but I had an older female introduce me to Kelligrl who was a friend of hers and that showed me that I wasn't alone. Fast forward to graduate school and my Professor named and soon to be girlfriend helped me actualize my dream to be a feeder but she even presented to me that this life of ours germinates into that feeder aspect turning it on ourselves and I dealt with those same issues of loneliness and my fears of no one wanting a superobese guy but I had to keep reminding myself the fact that I have to be comfortable with it and let things come as they go without taking things so seriously because too many of us mistake being alone for being lonely. Most of us don't have the social skills to broaden our network because we don't work on those skills but those points you brought up are correct but you are still young and life will have its ups and downs but I have amassed a social network just owning me being the fat guy with a gut and in a town like DC in which everyone is mostly fit; there are women around who are into it but the thing is that most are scared to admit it and others are just here to experience it and it wares off f
