BigBallBellyGirl:
Has anyone with a supersized belly used an obesity belt to alleviate back pain? I'm not looking for a bariatric compression belt like the ones people use after bariatric surgery. I'm hoping to find something that takes the pressure off my lower back, hips, and upper belly. The largest maternity belt I found extended to 70 inches. I'm about 80 inches around standing, but I thought it still might work. It definitely didn't. When I tried to sit, the hook and eye closures broke immediately.

How do my fellow big-bellied super-sized folks relieve back pain and support those tummies?

Munchies:
Do I personally know anyone? No. But I've worked in health insurance. I am not sure if they make them in your size (90 inches sitting iirc) but I can look.

That said, it will be expensive. If you do have health insurance, check to see if they have a bariatric coverage.

As for the obesity belts themselves? Your milage may vary. Some people love theirs while others find them too uncomfortable to be worth it.

BigBallBellyGirl:
I do have insurance, and I believe if it was prescribed, I could get coverage. You're right, though, I haven't been able to find one my size at all. Would love to know if you happen to hear of a company that makes them. Thank you!

Munchies:
After diligently searching, the biggest ones I could find supported girths up to 75 inches. However, I found something else.



I found this on Etsy It's called a womb wrap. etsy.com/listing/983212985/custom-colors-womb-wraps-custom-order

I have no idea if it's big enough for you, but I think that if it's not, you could make one yourself.

BigBallBellyGirl:
That's exactly what I was thinking! It looks like making one, or having one made, wouldn't be rocket science. Thank you for the recommendation!

Munchies:
Let's call a spade a spade. If you need to have a woman above a certain BMI to have an erection, you're just shallow.

Preferences are fine. Having compatible lifestyles is excellent. But if you need a partner of a certain size to be happy, you are shallow.

Let's flip this on its head. If a man said, "I am only attracted to thin women, but I am struggling to find any right for me. Maybe I can try my luck with fat women, but I would never want to sleep with them," everyone would call him shallow.

X_Larsson:
And you bring out the shaming gun again, just like you tried to imply porn overuse before, utterly false.
So predictible...

Feedism is not exclusively a BMI thing, as you very well know.
Recurring themes I see feedees use are:
Love to eat (often excessive overeating too)
Love to be pampered
Love the feeling of being fat
Does not mind, or actively enjoys gaining weight
Feel a strong bond between feeding aspects and sexual experiences

That is a set of distinct characteristics that put them in a completely different place, than the understimulated, depressed, unloved women that have stress eaten themselves into 25 kg of overweight.

X_Larsson:
If set to Inside 800 km radius from stockholm (capturing most of Sweden population, some of Norway, Denmark, Finland and some Germany/Poland,
25yo and up women, straight or bi, feedee, gainer or mutual, and online in the last 12 months gives 36 hits in total!
And like I said, that is a pretty wide scope, in my opinion. Geographically, it covers over 15 million people, I guess. Most of Sweden, plus Oslo, Copenhagen, Warsaw, Berlin, Hamburg, Helsinki. Some big cities.

But again, my initial question was about going outside the preference. I could offer that, haha, "instant friend zone", but without benefits?

Malvineous:
Ok, so there are only 3 viable options that I see for you.

1. Leave feedism in the realm of fantasy only. If you stopped looking for feedees, I'm sure that you can find a normal BBW. I guarantee you, there are fat women in Sweden somewhere. If she eventually loses weight and slims down, you could always get viagra. If you find yourself in a sexless marriage, that's pretty much a guarantee for unhappiness for both you.

2. Leave Sweden. Move the US, we probably have more feedees per capita than anywhere else in the world. It won't be easy. You'll have to save as much money as you can, it might even take you over a year to save for a one-way ticket and a month's living expenses. Arrange to get a job before you leave. Then, part ways with your friends and family and start fresh.

3. Don't date. Learn to accept living alone. You can still have friends of course, even with women. But you will slowly grow old, never getting to experience a romantic connection or have a family. Year by year, you will become more depressed, more bitter, more filled with regret. That's how the rest of your life will go if you stay stuck in one place.

I don't mean to sound harsh, but sometimes there are no good options. You just have to choose the lesser of 2 evils.

@Munchies,
By your definition, 99% of men are probably shallow. We're just wired differently. Maybe that's a bad thing, but it's outside of our control. Shaming someone for not being able to get an erection, for whatever reason, is not helpful.

X_Larsson:
If set to Inside 800 km radius from stockholm (capturing most of Sweden population, some of Norway, Denmark, Finland and some Germany/Poland,
25yo and up women, straight or bi, feedee, gainer or mutual, and online in the last 12 months gives 36 hits in total!
And like I said, that is a pretty wide scope, in my opinion. Geographically, it covers over 15 million people, I guess. Most of Sweden, plus Oslo, Copenhagen, Warsaw, Berlin, Hamburg, Helsinki. Some big cities.

But again, my initial question was about going outside the preference. I could offer that, haha, "instant friend zone", but without benefits?

Letters And Numbers:
Based on the way you project yourself in this thread, I would say no, don’t go outside your preferences to try to try to date women you won’t be attracted to. Maybe just start with making friends. And don’t dismiss therapy. I think you may be developing an unhealthy relationship with this kink or fetish or whatever term works best for you.

X_Larsson:
That is a somewhat odd way of framing your reply. I am still very interested in hearing how you base your recommendation. It might be helpful for me to know. Thanks!

Letters And Numbers:
When you “meet a woman with whom [you] share at least some intellectual and psycological common ground, and where things are fun and drama free”, what is stopping you from becoming her friend?

X_Larsson:
Yup. That is my original assumption here, and also what I wonder about. Friends, no benefits (?), but some strings attached (as friendship means).

X_Larsson:
@Munchies, I think your comparison of feedism vs homosexuality is a bit wrong, for two reasons.

1. This type of structure, or characterisation of sexual preferences is of course independant of how people value or oppose them. Ie, many men would probably have no issues having a colleague who is a very feminine, petite and "conventionally acting" homosexual woman.
But many men would find it less fun to work with a very feminine, petite and affected homosexual man.
Still, both the man and the woman are gay, regardless if they are more "easily accepted" or not.
2. In this era of rainbow, pride etc and wide established acceptance for homosexuality (and more), feeders are definitely hated, genuinely hated by many common people. I have heard friends, intelligent, highly educated and mature family men openly say that feeders are literally sick and evil, worth of nothing but disgust. The same goes for hearing women spew out their hatred for male feeders. It is both morally questionable and illegal to this, and I never see homosexuals discussed like that here in Sweden.

So no, in this very liberal and tolerant country, feeders are much more hated than homosexuals. (Obviously, I am not stating myself as a victim, just posting what life is like here.)

BustingButtons:
Honestly how would you like to hear they like your but they're not physically attracted to you.

Don't deny someone true happiness, let them date someone that appreciates every inch of them.

Also use porn less if you feel you're struggling to feel attraction.

ForeverFFA:
Not to get off topic, but the distinction I've often heard is that all fetishes are kinks (along the lines of Munchies' definition), but fetishes feel more obligatory to the person who has them.

Letters And Numbers:
Are you saying you can’t have a sexual relationship with a person you’re compatible with and are attracted to in many (of the most important) ways, like their personality and intellect? What if this woman wants a sexual relationship with you?

X_Larsson:
Not quite. I said that I am not attracted to, when initiating this.
For me, most "regular" women are as sexually neutral in my eyes, as men are. So, they do not even register as "person that could be sexually interesting". That includes movie stars, celebrities etc.

It is hard for me to speculate what her feelings would be, wrt physical attraction.

Chimneychonga:
Male attraction works a bit differently. Although I can appreciate someone with intellect and personality, sometimes that doesn't translate to the guy downstairs. Believe me, ED wouldn't be a problem if that's what all guys needed, much to women's chagrin.

As for OP, I think it's healthy to try out an asexual relationship if you're upfront with it ("I had a bad relationship earlier, so I'd rather take things slow until we get to know each other" ) . As long as she/they isn't in a rush, I think you both can enjoy the romance part and enjoying dates, learning new hobbies, and even if the relationship doesn't work out on friendly terms, both practice their skills on how to communicate and how to be open with feelings. The only downside is an explosive end to the relationship, but with low stakes, I really doubt that would happen. If you find someone open to the idea, enjoy the ride, smell the roses.

X_Larsson:
Thank you for the interesting reply. Yup, I think you (coincidentally) put your finger on one sensitive thing when you mentioned ED...
Women are more vain about their physical attraction and appearance than men are. I think most women (sadly) would have a major problem dating someone who does has no urge or feel no physical attraction to their bodies. And especially if they are somewhat "normally" atrractive, as in slender/medium weight etc. In a way, that would make them feel less coveted and less young/fertile, as a more cerebral/romantic/platonic relation would put her in some sort of "post sex", grandmother roll.

I will really think about this. I have made mistakes in form of selecting away from women due to lack of sexual compatibility. It HAS felt like the right thing to do, but it is a lonely path to be on.

ForeverFFA:
There's nothing wrong with wanting an asexual/platonic relationship for the reasons you described, but I think some of your attitudes towards women in general might need unpacking. Each woman has their own personality and relationship needs/expectations, just like with men and anyone else. It's not about vanity.

Chimneychonga:
Male attraction works a bit differently. Although I can appreciate someone with intellect and personality, sometimes that doesn't translate to the guy downstairs. Believe me, ED wouldn't be a problem if that's what all guys needed, much to women's chagrin.

Letters And Numbers:
I guess my thought is, if a fetish is interfering with your life to the point where you can’t have a normal relationship with a partner, and if that’s a problem (it might not be), sex therapy might be a solution. Maybe I’m wrong, but finding a partner who checks all the boxes (except physical looks) and who ALSO doesn’t want a sexual relationship might be a tall order. I mean, if someone told me they loved me and wanted an intimate relationship but they were unable to have sex with me because of how I look … idk. Not saying they don’t exist, but it’s an extra hurdle.

X_Larsson:
Yup! Thanks! But I have a couple of comments.
First. Feedism is not a fetish (which is more an object related deviation). I have read basically everything I have seen online (and in print) about the feedism thing, and it seems the authorities struggle to fit it into either the BDSM box (a big, fat no), or into more body transformation or parafilia related deviations (also a no go).
Feedism refuses to be put together with other deviations, is my view on this, just like homosexuality etc.
And feedism is not a "size" distinction. It is about the whole relation to appetite, food, consumption, gaining, AND size (and more?).

Secondly. (And I will be a bit tough here.)
What kind of attitude is it to say, that I cannot "have a normal relationship with a partner"?
Do you also tell straight people to enter relationships with homosexuals? Or tell 18 year old boys to marry 80 year old women?
If they objected, would you then send them to sex therapy?
Ok, on a lighter side. I have thought long and hard about sex therapy. It seems that the therapists generally want the client to explore and embrace their "natural" sexual preferences, unless they are illegal or revolting, like necrophilia or koprophilia.

That said, I also think it is a big spiritual defeat to resign any sexual aspirations in order to have at least a partial relation. Hmmm...

Letters And Numbers:
You can define it however you’d like, that’s not a problem, but if there is something standing in the way of your happiness, talking to someone might be helpful. Or maybe not. I wouldn’t paint all therapists with the same brush.

X_Larsson:
Well, I have talked to professional therapists, and also got the same general "embrace and explore" thing. My impression is that modern therapists / psychiatrists, never lead the client anywhere. The client has the answers inside, and by talking to the professional, the client will discover his/her best solution.

Good, but in this case not helpful for me.
(More self knowledge will not produce/introduce new feedees in my life, so to say.)