Freddii:So I’ve been bestfiends with this girl for 3 years and she knew about my kink (I’m a feedee). Recently I told her that I have feelings for her and she said that it makes her uncomfortable and stopped being friends with me. What should I do now? Is she in the right? I feel awful.
Munchies:From what you described, I don't think your kink was the issue. It seems more that you confessed to her than anything.
That being said, the fact that you said you guys were best friends implies there's much more to the story.
Freddii:She said it is the issue
PolyPinoyPuppy:With that in mind, did you bring feederism up in conjunction with your confession, or was it something she attached to it herself?
Regardless, I'm sorry. It's hard losing your friend in the best of circumstances. For it to be tied to something as personal as feederism, which many people already have to be in the closet about, adds to the agony.
I would hope that your friendship was strong enough to recover after some time. But that won't happen on its own. Unless she's gone no contact with you, there is still a possibility to find some sort of understanding that you value her friendship more than you would ever value kink.
Freddii:I did not bring it up, and when we were friends she would often joke about my kink so I didn’t expect it to make her that uncomfortable, but I didn’t even think about it when I confessed. I also told her that I’m not expecting her to get into relationship with me. And when we had a fight I told her that she doesn’t need to worry, that I don’t have feelings hor her anymore and that also made her angry, so I don’t know 😭. And thank you
Munchies:At this point, I'd just move on from her. She doesn't want to date you but doesn't want you to get over your feelings for her. That's just toxic.
I'm curious as to how you guys got into an argument and you told her you got over your feelings after she dumped you as a friend.
Freddii:She dumped me as a friend after that argument, I’m sorry if the informations I give are confusing, language barrier 😭
Also yeah, she was very toxic (the whole friendship) but that was kind of why I liked her too, I don’t know, it’s complicated
Speaking from experience, it's best to avoid toxic people like the plague. And don't be the toxic person either.
Toxic people drain you of your joy and your peace. You only have one life to live. No point in being miserable for the entire thing if you can avoid it.