Wat:
I see you have autism. That's going to make things extremely difficult because studies show a majority of autistic men never have a relationship or intercourse. Autism is basically a mental illness that makes you as unattractive as possible to women but I managed even though they diagnosed me with it. (I honestly think I was misdiagnosed but I obviously still had some signs so the disadvantages were the same). Here are some tips from my experience since we may have a more similar background than the others posting:
1. Never tell a girl you're a virgin, lie if you have to. This is basically telling a woman that no other woman has found you attractive. Women cannot really understand an unwilling virgin because men are pretty much constantly begging them for sex and in your 30s it is going to be a massive red flag. Perhaps it would be different with a deeply religious girl but those are very hard to find these days.
2. Don't blab about your mental issues to them. You are admitting to having a defective brain when you do this and that's going to scare away a lot.
3. Never whine or self depreciate like you did ITT.
4. Looks matter a ton. You probably aren't witty or popular enough to talk your way around being unkempt or ugly so you're going to need to do a lot of research in improving your appearance and working with what you've got.
5. The more friends you have the better. This will not only widen your social circle to include more people that know women but also make you appear more attractive. Even goofy autistic friends are better than no friends in public.
6. Learn to mask your autism around people. Observe how normal people speak/behave and emulate them. Perhaps even record yourself to pick out certain things you didn't notice before and fix them.
7. Manage good hygiene.
8. Your pool of potential girls on forums like this is laughably small to the point of it almost being a waste of time. Even something like tinder would be a vast improvement. Lucky for you society sees overweight women as being less attractive so that increases your chances, there is no shortage of bigger girls in western countries. Keep the fact that you find fat sexually arousing to yourself until you are very comfortable in your relationship though.
You need to tackle these as soon as possible and it is not going to be easy. Going to therapy and not making drastic lifestyle changes is not going to bear fruit for a 30+ year old autistic man. A lot of therapy is about learning to cope with things rather than improve them and in my experience they are going to try their hardest to steer you away from even trying with girls.
Autistic woman here. Autistic men can and do have happy long-term relationships. I know several - including some who have married other autistic people.
psychcentral.com/autism/autism-and-relationshipsSome proof of my statement instead ... whatever garbage you just pulled out of thin air.
1. There is nothing wrong with being a virgin. At all. And if a woman cannot love you for being a virgin, then move on. Plus, if you lie, she will find out.
2. Deeply religious women are pretty common.
3. There's nothing wrong with being open about mental health issues, but you should never burden people with them. It's your responsibility - not theirs.
4. Yes, you should take care of yourself and your appearance, but that was just cruel.
5. It's good to put yourself out there, but having a lot of friends isn't inherently attractive. It's more about how you treat/interact with your friends.
6. You shouldn't hide your autism. There's nothing wrong with being autistic (not that we know for sure OP is). I don't hide it, and people accept me for who I am. What you *SHOULD* do is learn how to interact with people in a healthy, productive manner.
7. Do not encourage OP to prey on insecure fat women. That's manipulative and abusive. We want him to live his best life and be happy. We don't want him to be some creep you see on the 6 o'clock news.
