Fantasy Feeder

Teaching normies to be feedees

Munchies:

Meanwhile, kink negotiations center the person and not the kink. It makes for a more mutually satisfying outcome.

Morbidly A Beast:
There’s a lot of people still out there who have no concept of kink and fetishes. Like me for an example prior to getting into this I really had no idea, and to be frank I still don’t. Are we as “kinksters” forever at a advantage over others in that regard?

Munchies:
Those who know more about a kink - even if it's just that the kink exists - have an advantage over outsiders. As such, we have the ability to greatly influence how a non-feedist partner practices feedism. And that goes for any kink.

Of course, that influence will be there no matter what. But a good partner will do whatever it takes to give their partner agency as they figure out their boundaries and interests.

I've noticed in the forums that whenever a feedist (usually a feeder) brings their non-feedist partner into the kink, the ones that ensure their partner's agency tend to work out better long term than those that don't.

Morbidly A Beast:
Interesting and noted. Do you think I need to express to a potential non-feedist partner that this isn’t my “final form” so to speak?

At some point, but maybe not initially. Only if you foresee this person sticking around long-term.

I typically ease my romantic into things. I'm fairly upfront about liking intense things. But I ease them into the intensity - even if they say they like the same things. I've had play partners and hook-ups abruptly end because it was too much too soon and they had a panic attack.

Of course, I'm a sadist.

2 years

Munchies

I want to be fat, but i dont want to be fat...

Johnxyz:
In many cases, gaining weight is a choice, but remaining fat is not. Once you're fat, eating less will slow your metabolism and cause you to gain, and eating more will cause a gain. You look nice at your current weight, but I can understand that being over 600 pounds is not always easy.

DMVGrower:
Losing weight isn't easy and in my experience what they say about the whole "fat cells don't go away only shrink" seems true. I have been losing pretty successfully for 2 or 3 years now but if I take a few days to chill, like vacation I start putting it back on and pretty quick.

Voluptuouslover:
This right here - I have actually got down to my lowest in a very long time and in really good shape aesthetically and physically with abs again for the first time in so many years. Well this was true about six months ago - I first realized I had gained in the last 3 mo this at a doctors bi- annual check up gaining 19 lbs. since the last visit. Just got back from a vacation with the wife where both of us clearly put on more weight and all of a sudden I have a gut sitting out on my lap and getting in the way of most everything g I do again - such a different feeling I have not had in a while. The wild thing is it triggered something in me again to start intentionally gaining again within the last week. I am not only stuffing my self but my wife seems to have noticed my big gut again and has been secretly filling my plate with massive amounts at breakfast, lunch & dinner. I intentionally gaining and she is secretly helping without out is discussing it. It is a crazy arousing situation for me.

Truth be told like above - or took forever to get in that kind of shape and only next to no time to ruin it and get a big gut again - after over eating for a while - o am already eating 2-3 times as much as I used to. All of a sudden my days are about consuming large mounts of food and being horny and fattened all the time.

DMVGrower:
Yeah honestly Obesity is sort of a life long condition if they don't classify it as such because you are always om the edge of being obese again. I suspect that is why so many biggest loser contestants blew up again. Not that their eating habits were poor, but they probably were. But more that they still have all the fat and it just needed to be filled again.

That's not why. They regained everything because they didn't lose weight sustainably. The whole show is a nightmare. It's basically a torturous crash diet.

There are ways to lose weight and keep it off. But that takes time, resources, and support.

Yes, if you lose a ton of weight, you have to be careful avoiding the regains. But it's not like you have to go on a starvation diet of water and celery.

2 years

Munchies

How many in a relationship where your partner weighs more than you?

Milhause:
I’m just curious how many are in a situation where your partner weighs more than you? I’m 5’7 150lbs and my spouse is 5’4” 220 lbs and I find the contrast so sexy. She’s all tummy and she’s so beautiful.

I've never not been in a relationship where my partner weighs more than me.

2 years

Munchies

What is the hottest cause for someone who's been maintaining weight, to suddenly start gaining?

Curiousv:
For me it's if she's already considerably fat, and loves eating, but she can manage (even if only barely) to hold herself back from stuffing herself all the time, because of being afraid of not being accepted.

Showing her affection and acceptance, as well as she gradually learning that I not only tolerate her size but love it, might make her to abandon her restraints, and start indulging herself completely.
I would feel somewhat guilty (even though I neither forced nor tricked her into it), but it is such a hot fantasy.

Celiamarie:
Personally, I quite enjoy the BDSM adjacent aspects of it; she knows that I prefer her larger body, so she continues to gain to appeal to me. And then as we go about our day with her new body, knowing that it's down to my handiwork... It's not dissimilar to the appeal of collaring... ?

I also really, really like the idea of a woman rewarding her small weight loss achievements with lots of treats, and undoing all of her progress.

Both of these scenarios have kind of unfolded with my girlfriend, which is probably why I like them so much 😆

There's something truly sexy about fattening up your sub. Knowing I had a personal hand in the situation really revs me up.

My partner is loosing weight for health reasons, but we've agreed to fatten him back up once we get his health under control. The idea is super sexy.

2 years

Munchies

What is the hottest cause for someone who's been maintaining weight, to suddenly start gaining?

Curiousv:
For me it's if she's already considerably fat, and loves eating, but she can manage (even if only barely) to hold herself back from stuffing herself all the time, because of being afraid of not being accepted.

Showing her affection and acceptance, as well as she gradually learning that I not only tolerate her size but love it, might make her to abandon her restraints, and start indulging herself completely.
I would feel somewhat guilty (even though I neither forced nor tricked her into it), but it is such a hot fantasy.

So long as there's open and honest communication, I don't see the point in feeling guilty. It's simply fortuitous.

For me, there's three ways:

Fit person needing to put on weight for a reason (sport, movie role) and enjoying themselves a little too much.

Gaining weight while recovering from and injury. Bonus points if they have someone to spoil them with treats and good food.

Sympathy weight gain during their partner's pregnancy and never losing the weight.

2 years

Munchies

Teaching normies to be feedees

Munchies:

Meanwhile, kink negotiations center the person and not the kink. It makes for a more mutually satisfying outcome.

Morbidly A Beast:
There’s a lot of people still out there who have no concept of kink and fetishes. Like me for an example prior to getting into this I really had no idea, and to be frank I still don’t. Are we as “kinksters” forever at a advantage over others in that regard?

Those who know more about a kink - even if it's just that the kink exists - have an advantage over outsiders. As such, we have the ability to greatly influence how a non-feedist partner practices feedism. And that goes for any kink.

Of course, that influence will be there no matter what. But a good partner will do whatever it takes to give their partner agency as they figure out their boundaries and interests.

I've noticed in the forums that whenever a feedist (usually a feeder) brings their non-feedist partner into the kink, the ones that ensure their partner's agency tend to work out better long term than those that don't.

2 years

Munchies

Teaching normies to be feedees

Morbidly A Beast:
Y’all feeders might have a easier time with people who are already fat I mean for me it was just a failed diet a lil bit of body positivity and fat acceptance and I was hooked — it’s important however to express those intentions not all fatties like being fat

True. I've mostly gone after bigger guys, but not all of them have been feedists. Of those that weren't feedists, were happy with their bodies. They didn't want to lose weight, but they didn't want to gain it either. Others just wanted to be fitter or slimmer.

Fortunately, feedism isn't a deal breaker and I am happy to do other things.

That being said, I'd rather a non-feedist become a feedist because they honestly enjoy it, and not because they feel like they have to do it to please me. I love dominance play and all, but power imbalances? No thank you. I've been on both sides of that coin. Never ends well.

This is why I take umbrage with Dr. Feeder using the word "teach" in this context. It implies there's a power imbalance. The potential feedee becomes an object for the feeder to fulfill their fetish. The feedee doesn't get to find out what works for them.

Meanwhile, kink negotiations center the person and not the kink. It makes for a more mutually satisfying outcome.

2 years

Munchies

Teaching normies to be feedees

AskDrFeeder:
I'm not talking about just introducing someone to a new thing, I'm talking about the case where you introduce them to a new thing and they get into it. If you don't want to call that "teaching", fine by me but your term doesn't quite work either.

Munchies:
That's basic English, but you do you, boo.

AskDrFeeder:
I don't know, sometimes you introduce someone to a new thing and they don't like it.

Correct. And if you paid attention to everything else I said, I said in my original post that all you can do is kink negotiations

2 years

Munchies

Body goals, not weight goals

TubSlug:
I'm always being asked my goal weight, but for me it's more about how my body looks and feels. I know that I can't control where the weight goes, but I have a wish list of body goals. I'll start by sharing one of them here. A lot of my recent weight has gone to my belly. I'm hoping one day it will be big enough to hide my underwear when I'm standing. What are your body goals, real or fantasy? Maybe you'll inspire me ☺️☺️

Back when I was a gainer, I started off with goal weights. This developed into a borderline eating disorder. Once I stopped weighing myself, it was a lot better for me.

Now that I'm a feeder, I have to say it's more fun to focus on the overall shape than it is to hit a specific goal weight. It's a lot less stressful and lets us enjoy things more.

On the flip side, don't get too wrapped up in your body shape. Sometimes, things won't turn out exactly how you want them to. Maybe you were hoping to be bottom-heavy, but everything goes straight to your middle.

Gain if it makes you feel good. Stop when it doesn't. And love yourself through the entire process.

2 years

Munchies

Eating your own weight in food

Bassbum60:
I'm just gonna weigh all the food I eat and measure how long it'll take me, I'm aiming for less than a month but that's still loads

Might need more than a month.

According to your profile, you are 220 lbs. The average human eats about 3-4 lbs of food a day. This comes out to 55 days.

Hypothetically speaking, you could eat 8 lbs of food in a day and make it in 27 - 28 days. However, based on my experiences with stuffing my feedees all day for extended stretches of time, you won't be able to eat that much consistently.

Also, depending on your current capacity, you may be unable to eat 8 lbs in a day. You'd need to train yourself to eat that much.

2 years

Munchies