I love the word "plump" - it's just a lovely word to say. Something about how it sounds and feels to speak it - the starting P into a rolling tongue LUM, ending with a final P.

But I also have come to love the word "fat". It used to have such a negative connotation when I was younger, but as I've grown to embrace my preferences and what I find to be seductive and attractive, the word "fat" has also taken on a very sexy positive.

For me, there is something bold and empowering and sexy about describing someone as fat. While I would never directly describe someone as fat before learning about THEIR perspective on the word, anytime I hear someone described as "fat", I am immediately more interested.

THIS

One of my ultimate fantasies would be a relationship with a soft feeder who hums while they cook, loves trying out new recipes on me, and who sees my weight gain as a reflection of how much I love them.

I'm not sure if you are missing a "not" in your description of your wife - as in, "...but she's NOT into it herself."

If she IS into it, then I would explore what aspects she is into - I was lucky to have a few feedee girlfriends and they were into different aspects of gaining. One really loved the "naughtiness" of stuffing, and so we played into that approach by getting very calorie-rich foods and then I'd do some soft "scolding" when she overate (which encouraged her to do it more).

Another was into the physical aspect of getting bigger, and was more turned on by my grabbing and slapping and shaking her fat body and compliments about how big she was getting.

Talk to her and see what turns her on.

If you meant to say "NOT" into it, then it makes things a bit more delicate and I would recommend exploring both of your kinks and what you enjoy. Make it about your sexuality together rather than simply about what YOU need.

I had a girlfriend who was completely turned OFF by the idea and as we got to know each other better, it became clear that she was not only against weight gain, but repulsed by it and hated the thought of gaining even a single pound. (We didn't last long after that.) While I tried to help her understand that I had kinks but not requirements, it would be unreasonable and self-absorbed of me to expect her to change her core person just because we started dating.

Start slowly and just TALK with her. If she's willing to try a little bit to make you happy then make sure to reciprocate for her needs and then provide positive feedback and gratitude.

Good luck!

I am trans-friendly! I don't tend to post many trans-specific content because I tend to post broader topic content as a way to be inclusive. But I'm completely accepting of ANYONE who wants to connect on a variety of topics!

Sorry to hear that you don't feel as if many have connected with you. I echo the sentiments above - use the forums versus waiting to hear from DMs!

If your experience is like mine, it can be a bit daunting to undo a lifetime of culture norms and go from being thin or fit into a state where you can relax the belly and not suck it in while out and about. It took me a long time to adjust my mindset that it was "okay" to be fatter - I now am so.much more relaxed about letting my belly expand and hang out.

But it has taken some practice.

I HIGHLY advise you to go to Walmart if you need some practice just letting your belly and/or curves be fat in public. I found a really high proportion of overweight customers at my local Walmart. Like everywhere else, you eventually stsrt to realize that nobody at Walmart cares if you are fit or fat, but it seemed easier to be relaxed when I was one of many fat customers in the store.

It's such a liberating experience to relax the belly and just exist as a fatter version of yourself - you soon learn that nobody really gives a flip. And with more practice, you eventually realize that it doesn't matter... even if anyone DID care, it's such a small blip on your life's timeline and you will likely never see them again.

I know that there must be plenty of fat-phobic customers and employees at Walmart, so i dont want to make careless sweeping generalizations, but mine has been so helpful for the transition from slim to fst.

I can vouch for this experience a bit - I was 180 about 2 years ago and have jumped up over the last two years to my current weight of 228 (knocking on 230).

At first, it seemed to take so much longer than I initially expected to "fatten" up because the stories that I was accustomed to reading and the pictures that we favorite on feeder sites seemed to show a magical type of gain. I didn't experience this. I initially experienced the highs of intentionally overeating and stuffing, and then imagining how big I was going to be the next day - only to find that nothing seemed to stick. I was getting a lot of short-term gratification in just loading up with calories, but I didn't feel like it was working.

And then, one day - my clothing felt a bit uncomfortable. Like seriously - just out of the blue.

I didn't feel "fat" - it just felt like my clothing was a bit snug to the point of being just a little annoying.

That's hiw it started for me, anyway. I ended up buying one size up and rejoiced in a milestone, but I didn't look or feel fat. So I kept up the overeating and secretly stuffing and buying double of everything.

The next phase felt like I was doing something wrong because my portions were disappearing faster and I still had capacity (and a new feeling of "bottomless pit" when eating).

It wasn't until I hit 200 at the end of.my first year that I felt like I was making any real progress.

Year 2 for me was when I first started feeling like the weight was showing up as fat. My love handles softened a bit first before I noticed some softer fat on my belly. I was stuffed all the time so the belly growth really only felt like a full gut until one random morning when I woke up and couldn't button my "fat pants" because I couldn't suck in the squish of my waistline.

So... my experience was a lot more gradual than I thought it would be - even though 50 pounds in 2 years is a lot.

Be ready for your doctor to start raising an eyebrow, too.

I liked fatness even as a little kid. I had an overstuffed plush bear called "Roly Poly" that I preferred, and I remember being drawn to plus-size teachers and adults who I thought were soft and warm in both body and spirit.

Honestly my first "awakening" moment was when I worked on a sewing project in my early teens and had the chance to create a stuffed animal. I promptly overfilled it with poly - I remember feeling a wonderful sense of nonsexual admiration both for this chunky little stuffie and for my deliberate choice to make it as fat as its seams would allow.

I also found an Overeaters Anonymous book that described people's stories with food addiction - I'm embarrassed to admit that I found the sections describing the members weight gain and binge eating to be erotic and being confused about why I found these sections to be more compelling than the contributors' subsequent weight loss stories.

When I started dating I found that I was most attracted to overweight girls, and that food and feeding were my love language. I found a feeder website in college, and that was the first time that I was able to learn that I wasn't alone in how I felt, and that there were even people out there who liked being fed as much as I liked feeding.

[slowly raises hand]

Me. I need new... everything.

(Except socks. I'm okay in the socks department.)

I agree - not the best look to hit on the clientele or their family. Probably a tale best left to the fantasy fiction section...