Angelette:
Thanks everyone. I did talk to 988 weeks ago. I might again because work has gotten worse for me. I wish to quit my job right now. It makes me miserable.
MarshmallowMinotaur:
I didn’t see if you mentioned having a doctor but if you do they can very likely certify you for temporary state disability. I occasionally have to do it for my back (failed lumbar fusion). Depending on how long you’ve worked and paid into the fund by employer withholding you could be eligible for a couple of months. No promises but it’s something to consider. Contact your state’s unemployment office.
Angelette:
Thank you but I am not physically disabled. I hope your back healed though. 🙂
It’s possible to get FMLA leave for mental health conditions, but you would need to be working with a doctor who could write the letter. It is possible though.
12 months
Would it be helpful if users could report individual posts or threads? The spam bots that have been coming through lately are all over the place, and you can report the account but not the posts. On the other hand, I can see people reporting slap fights and stuff like that and just making a lot of work for the admins.
12 months
FaireShade:
My fiance brought home 15 lbs of Casey's maple pumpkin spice cappuccino mix. Obviously mix it with milk for drinks, but what else should I put it in?
Vanilla or tapioca pudding? That’s a lot of cappuccino mix
1 year
Abyssal Mind:
I'm considering trying to make some money from this hobby/passion, I'm very naive on how I'd go about it. I have low self-esteem so I've been scared to try because I'm worried that I'm in over my head or that I'm not good enough. I'm not necessarily trying to go premium but if it's a good start then I'll try it out, otherwise selling my stories in general might go well for me.
I have a hard time selling myself so any help or tips would be appreciated, I've never done anything like this before and I want to try to take the next big step.
Always Grateful, A.M.
Pros about premium stories:
1) It’s very easy to do, just takes pay pal and a form of ID
Cons:
1) don’t expect to make a lot of money, at least not quickly. A few bucks might trickle in from renewals down the road, but not a lot. Some premium stories don’t earn any money. Some do!
2) you’re restricting who can read your stuff, it’s a much smaller audience, fewer likes and comments, etc.
1 year
November is coming to an end if there are any suggestions or volunteers for December
1 year
Letters And Numbers:
Not trying to be rude or dismissive, but maybe a fetish website is not the right place to learn how to express yourself online. Why not start with a space that’s about hobbies or something less heavy?
Estil17:
Because I do feel passionately about my eh, special interests in my profile (I don't know if "fetish" is exactly right). I already have a couple of forums I frequent for my "normal" hobbies.
My guess would be that trying to learn how to communicate one-on-one with people on a fetish website is doing it on hard mode. Just get used to the idea that people get cold feet and disappear off this site, or will think you’re into weird sex shit in a different way than they’re into weird sex shit and get spooked. Or that fundamentally there are people on here because they can’t have this fetish be a part of their real life and don’t want to blur those lines. The word fantasy is right in the title.
I guess my one other tip would be that you’ve made your grief (which I’m very sorry for, I can’t even imagine) the main character across half a dozen threads this morning. That’s heavy stuff, man. Posting in the forum is fun, post more often about stuff that isn’t always so heavy. You don’t need to hide your loss but it doesn’t have to be so up front. I know it’s harder around the holidays. (You can post in the Story of the Month threads whenever you like! They’re nice!)
1 year
Munchies:
I have ASD and PTSD. I struggled a lot with relationships because of it. So I took a 5 year dating hiatus to work on myself. I struggled to understand social cues, so I learned what they were and how to communicate effective to smooth out misunderstandings. I have PTSD, so I learned healthy coping mechanisms as well as dealing with my trauma.
I'm not 100% better. More like 60% to 80% depending on the day. And I am always trying to improve.
It doesn't sound like you are ready to date yet. It's not because of your mental illness. Instead, it doesn't sound like you've learned to self regulate.
Estil17:
Oh I'm nowhere near the "dating" part yet...for right now I'm just trying to find to get good at the online part!
Not trying to be rude or dismissive, but maybe a fetish website is not the right place to learn how to express yourself online. Why not start with a space that’s about hobbies or something less heavy?
1 year
Letters And Numbers:
Therapy doesn’t just stop when you don’t click well with your therapist. That just means you need to try someone else. Give it another try.
Estil17:
I don't know what it is they could tell me that I don't already know...and I don't think they'd be much help on these kind of matters.
I’m not going to diagnose you online, but you seem to clearly be dealing with grief and trauma. Therapy is pretty helpful with both of those, but not every therapist is a trauma expert. And not every therapist is an expert at working with neurodivergent adults. You need to do a little research and be patient and be open to therapy. Going in thinking that there’s nothing they can teach you that you don’t already know is the wrong approach. We don’t take that approach with any other medical (or mechanical) problem. Be humble and let a professional talk to you with an open mind, but don’t expect that every therapist will be the perfect fit. You might need to try someone new if it’s not working out. I just left a therapist of over 10 years because we weren’t making progress any more, they weren’t challenging me. It happens.
1 year
Therapy doesn’t just stop when you don’t click well with your therapist. That just means you need to try someone else. Give it another try.
1 year
Estil17:
There is a major problem I seem to have and it really frustrates me as I feel like I keep making this same mistake over and over again. I often come on too strong too soon (online I mean) and I end up scarring the other person away :,(
Like, there was someone here who was really one of a kind, one in a billion, thought she might be "The One" but as I often do I stupidly came on too strong and she ended up ghosting me, even after she reassured me (because I kept asking to make sure I was doing everything right) that "You are fine" and she would say "I appreciate that". I mean, I thought maybe I had some appeal for her but...as I often do, I blow it. :,( And of course I've had more than my fair share of catfishers too I'm sorry to say.
I wish I could somehow learn from my mistakes and do better...I've been quite depressed and lonely lately (seasonal changes probably don't help that any) and it might be that it will soon be 2 1/2 years since my wife passed away. Still, can anyone help me be as appealing and persuasive and all that as I can? And try not to come off too strong too soon? I know that's my main problem by far...
Maybe repeatedly asking if you were interacting with her correctly gave off the wrong vibe.
1 year
