I feel like we are talking about apples and oranges. We are talking about the fake female feedee/gainer profiles that try to scam people out of their money. And sometimes, the person is actually a cisman pretending to be a woman for nefarious purposes. I've personally interacted with a couple of those people.

What you are talking about is the way people react to women owning and expressing their sexuality. Still, a good topic of conversation.

Lemme put it to you like this. Just as men of a variety of different body types enjoy women of a variety of different body types, women of a variety of different body types enjoy men of a variety of different body types.

Some curvy women like fit guys. Some don't. Others have no opinion.

Munchies:
It's a group effort. Culture's what you make of it. You do what you can, where you can, and encourage others to join you.

As I said, the root of the issue is toxicity. It's not enough to be a decent person. You also have to push back against that behavior and encourage others to be better.


EIIe:
All of what you said and especially this part.

It’d also helpful if the moderators would shut down the misogynistic vitriol that comes at the women on this site. I know they already do a lot and it still deserves to be said.

The moderators have a lot more power than they exert. I feel like if they were really trying to shift the culture and make this a safer place for women to explore they’d remove the bad apples.[/quote]

I could be talking out the side of my neck, so forgive me if this is wrong. What I am about to say is 100% based on the things I have seen. I have no special insight and could be missing some very important details.

The guidelines for interacting with others on this site feel very ... loose. So the moderators seem to use their best judgement on a case by case basis. Add to the fact that all the moderators I see seem to have very different values, morals, and ethics. I am not saying that any of them are bad people. I'm just saying that things feel a bit ... patchwork.

I'm not going to say I know the best way of doing things - because I don't. And I don't want to be a moderator. I don't have the time for that. I just feel like there could be more cohesion and better guidelines on what is and isn't allowed so people feel safe but not stifled. Last thing anyone wants is an over correction.

My feedee doesn't drink it straight. He usually mixes it with chocolate milk and drinks it throughout the day. Last time he tried to chug it, he passed out. Although, it was a *lot* of heavy cream. I haven't let him do that since.

Doing the Lord's work, my good sir.

If you want to make any relationship work, you need to have clear and effective communication. Sure, you're telling your boyfriend he isn't fat, but that isn't the same thing as assuring him you like the way he looks.

Telling him he isn't fat will only work for so long. At some point, depending on his comfort level and how big he gets, that won't work anymore. All you are doing is kicking the proverbial can down the road.

It make be true that your boyfriend isn't fat. He might just be less toned. But all that tells him is you aren't worried about his body being defined. It doesn't tell him that you'd be okay - let alone happy - if he got fat. At best, it tells him you'd tolerate his flab. At worse, it tells him you find him attractive so long as he isn't properly fat.

It would be better to assure your boyfriend that you'd love him and find him attractive at any size. At the end of the day, every man wants to feel safe, secure and loved. Doesn't matter how macho he is. He's still a person with feelings at the end of the day.

Heavy cream is good at putting weight on you. My feedee practically drinks the stuff like water, and he is huge. However, your metabolism still exists. Four days of indulgence isn't enough to change that. And if your calorie consumption isn't enough to maintain that weight, you will lose it.

It has nothing to do with the cream. There is nothing wrong with you. Its just basic biology.

That being said, you may benefit from more sustainable methods. If you are like most people and simply struggle to chug the stuff, you can use it as an ingredient for drinks and dishes. Alternatively, if the issue is price, then consider cheaper options like peanut butter.

Rapid weight gains are very difficult to sustain. You may need to adjust your expectations.

Or be super intense (and a little bit insane) like my feedee.

Ex-gainer here. I used to be in the same boat as you.

I started my journey at 115 lbs and was 5'7". I was on the high end of being underweight, and I hated it. I kept getting sick, nothing really fit me right, and I was super boney.

I also had a very high metabolism. No matter what (or how much) I ate, nothing ever stuck. And I was pretty much always eating.

I remember when I finally gained 10 lbs. Seeing the numbers go up was like a drug, and I was addicted. I'd hop on the scale upwards of 5 times a day. Everything I did was to see the numbers go up. I'd get upset if I lost even an ounce.

I was going through a lot at this time. Gaining was the only thing I had any kind of control over. So I obsessed over it. I'd eat and drink whatever I could to change my body to my liking, no matter how gross it was.

I tried to drink cooking oil a couple of times, but it was nasty as all get out, and I couldn't manage more a swallow or two. 0/10, do not recommend.

At some point , I realized I wasn't happy. I still wanted to gain, but the way I went about it made me miserable. I'd see all these other gainers and feedees enjoying life and was so jealous of them.

I had to realize that while gaining was something that I wanted, it wasn't going to fix me. I was using it as a coping mechanism. Heck, I think that I was well on my way to an eating disorder. I had to take a step back and deal with my issues in a healthy way.

It took some doing, but over time, I fell in love with gaining again - even more than I did the first time. I stopped worrying about the numbers. I ate what I enjoyed, and not what would make me fat. I even realized I didn't want to be fat. I just wanted to be bigger. So I got buff.

I stopped gaining a few years ago. My weight fluctuates between 165 and 168. I'm happy with myself now. I love what I see in the mirror, and I am grateful that I decided to gain weight in the first place. Not just because I got bigger, but because it challenged me to reevaluate who I am as a person and to be my best self.

I know it can be scare and hard to do. But I know you are strong enough to do it. If you were strong enough to start this journey, then I have every confidence that you're strong enough to do this too

This wasn't a "racial preference" as you put it. A racial preference would be them preferring white people, but if a POC came along, and they hit it off, they wouldn't be against that.

For them, race is a deal breaker. As in "if you aren't white, I won't even talk to you." They literally said, "Age doesn't matter, but race does."

This is not to say that the other things you mentioned aren't worth raising an eyebrow over - specifically the frequent deletions and demographic changes. But this should be on the list too.

Did not know that. Doing me a heckin' educate, my friend.