Show her affection and compliment her beauty. But do not make direct and specific compliments about her "cute belly" or "larger" areas. She's obviously self-conscious and this is only going to deepen her insecurity. When immersed in a caring, supportive relationship, she might get over it and embrace her body. But there's really nothing you can do about it other than show love.

Just warning you, though; her weight is obviously a hot button for her. I'd lay off it.

When my wife makes comments that she likes her bigger hips, I'll pile on and make my feelings known. But I never bring up her bigger size out of the blue because it could very well be "one of those days" where she's not feeling too pretty and any "compliment" about her size will be received negatively.

Yes and no. She loves her new curves and immediately gave away all of her old skinny clothes to a friend. When we're making love, she even surprises herself and is like "look how massive my boobs are now?! This is crazy! I've always wanted these!"

And one thing I noticed when we first got married was that she was attracted to much heavier girls. And this was before I had discovered this fetish - so it was strange to me that she always eyed up obese women.

But like with most women, society's constructs of self-image run deep. And there are moments where she wishes to be thin again. But her obsession with food always reminds her that the reality of becoming and staying thin just doesn't fit the daily desires and enjoyment she wants in life.

This may sound cynical, but I think she misses not her body....but the feeling of pride and power – being that one 100lb girl in the room everybody's looking at, wanting to be. That doesn't die easily...

Had an obese roommate in college who would add an entire block of cream cheese to his macaroni. It's actually pretty amazing!

Gabapentin isn't known for weight gain like many other drugs. I didn't realize it until Polkadotpanties41's post about her putting on 40lbs due to it. Then I started connecting the dots when my wife mentioned it makes her so sleepy. An hour after she takes it I'd then notice her camped out on the couch eating when she used to always be doing active things like cleaning. At work she started buying multiple blue Red Bulls for alertness which have 50% more calories than Pepsi.

One more quick story that affirmed this in me.

The summer I really fell out of feederism because I was hardcore dieting trying to get down to 8% BF is ironically when my wife started really ballooning up. And I couldn't understand it at the time.

Recently in conversation she mentioned "you think I've gotten fat, you should see Richard (her boss)" (laughs). I learned her boss has put on over 150lbs in the last 2 years and, unbeknownst to me, was constantly fattening up my wife that summer bringing her ice cream almost daily and taking the team out to lunch.

"Oh yeah, he totally changed my opinion on donuts. We'd go to this great donut shop almost every morning."

Whole thing was surreal. After all my hard work and planning I had to hear "Look at this (jiggles her belly). So much of this is because of him."

But whatever, high five Richard!

Once a girl is gaining, it's really a steam train that's hard to stop. The smaller frame, hormone profile and slowing metabolism is truly stacked against them. Just let her do her thing and nudge with some snacks. Most people have countless opportunities to indulge. If it's gonna happen, it's gonna happen.

The full on feeder route of counting calories, constantly pushing food does get laborious and frustrating at times.

As a feeder it's so hard for me to relinquish control and not always be pushing for more calories. BUT that said... my wife has often gained the most when I was off my game and not cooking or stocking the fridge.

So let her do her thing. When she does, she's most likely picking the exact foods she wants in the moment and will eat more as a result.

When I wasn't heavily stocking the fridge and cabinets, it produced many "uh, we don't have anything I like in the fridge" moments. She would always then push to order a massive takeout meal or we'd end up at a restaurant w/her eating an appetizer to herself that was probably double to triple in calories what she would have ate if I fed her at home.

Let her do her thing.

Huh, my wife is on Gabapentin which is virtually identical to Lyrica. It definitely makes her relaxed and really snoozy, lethargic - especially when it first kicks in. I noticed when she started a couple years ago she would take mid-day naps on Saturdays, very apt to lay around, crack beers at noon and just started a general trend of slothfulness and a huge “reward complex”.

I never connected her recent weight gain together with her meds until about 6 months ago. I don't think it's the sole reason – it doesn't increase appetite. But def compounds the fattening trends already going on.

The “reward complex” I refer to is when she’s fought through the lethargy of the Gabapentin to so some minor cleaning task she now "needs a moment to rest". It immediately drives her to lay around and snack as the ‘reward’ for her “hard” work. I noticed this cycle a while back as she does less and less around the house. On Saturdays when she actually does bust her ass with cleaning, it almost guarantees she will spend the evening exhausted, binge eating through movies all night as her “reward”.

To this day she has never realized weight gain is a side effect of Gabapentin and has never blamed her meds for her general slothfulness – primarily because she doesn’t identify it as being slothful. She's just tired from all of her hard work! "Down time" used to be late at night. Now it's basically "down time" all the time, the moment she gets home.

It really did get her over the hump of identifying that she's grabbing a snack that's going to make herself fat - and to consciously identify that she doesn't care anymore because this is a long awaited reward that she deserves for being so "hard worked" and exhausted.

Quick followup, we’re now a few weeks away from the vacation. My wife is the heaviest she’s ever been. She tried running for a few days a couple weeks ago and ended up developing plantar fasciitis in her foot - a possible tear. She’s now completely couch and crutches bound. We’re now concerned about how much walking she’ll be able to do on the trip. She’s been prescribed Prednisone as well. There have been numerous threads about it here and its infamous appetite and weight gain associated w/the drug.

Hopefully her foot recovers. But yeah, bikini body is the farthest thing from both our minds right now. Will be interesting to see how she responds to the Pred.

Oh yes, I LOVE tracking my wife's calories and see them ramp up and up as time goes on. Becoming fat is all about slow habit changes over time and as a feeder, satisfaction often comes in changes so subtle that you would need to calorie count to even recognize them.

There was a time I almost doubled her daily calorie intake simply by buying different beer and wine for her. But again, it's all about calorie counting and research as a feeder to keep your feedee growing past plateaus.

I'll check a restaurant's appetizer nutrition info before we get there so I know the top calorie foods to recommend.

I also love checking our bank account and seeing her food spending.

She slowly spends a little bit more on lunch every month. And then snacking: she was never a snacker and it took years of normalizing picking up snacks whenever/wherever we were. Now it's natural to her when she's on her own to identify snacking occasions. You can't just pump gas, might as well grab a "pick me up". Or first it was one vending machine charge while she works. Now it's 2 - 4 little candy/soda charges throughout the day.

And when she runs errands it's great to see the little charges - can never go to the mall for just clothes...she might as well make a quick stop at Sbarro's and Starbucks.

It took a long time to engrain it in her to stop for food even though she wasn't hungry. You don't naturally think like a glutton when you've been skinny for most your life. But it's little baby steps, always adding in an extra snack, an extra drink. And then keeping that consistent so it becomes the "new normal".

We have a bunch of really heavy women at my office. And whenever there are sweets or a cake, people offer it to them....they always decline. But when once the meeting is over I always see them slyly sneak 2 large slices and hightail it back to their cubicles, lol.