Having a moment of idiocy!

UKLionheart:
Thanks. This is the screen I cannot find. Haha.


Ok, so you can’t find that screen either? When you go to “My Stories” there’s a button to Edit each story at the bottom. It takes you to the page where you can add chapters.
1 year

The truth (husband not an fa)

Maybe he did want you to read it, who knows. Definitely a conversation to have as you discuss pregnancy, though.
1 year

The truth (husband not an fa)

Seven8the9:
Thank you. I appreciate you all saying what you have, as it validates my feelings.

I do agree that going to the gym/working out elsewhere would be good for general health.

I can't help feel betrayed or led on. In his dating profile, it said his preference was larger women. That's one of the main reasons I messaged him. When I asked him about this early on, thinking it was flirting on the idea that he was an FA, he said that he was just trying to get more responses to his dating profile. And that he likes fit-thick women. Which I'm not and never was.

Pregnancy obviously will come with bodily changes, during and after... all of which I thought he would relish in but now I feel very insecure.


If it were me, that last paragraph is what I would lead with and i probably wouldn’t bring up that you read his journal. 1) I don’t think you need to and 2) that’s not a small invasion of privacy unless he did something like leave it open in a conspicuous place bookmarked to a page he wanted read. Meaning: he probably wanted his private thoughts private. You can have this talk with him without bringing that up.
1 year

🦇november story club - a pleasurable hunt🦇

I guess I’ll start!

I really enjoyed this story, not just because it’s gothic and grotesque and sexy too, but that sub theme that kindness and mercy leads to greater abundance than ruthlessness is great. The whole “pigs get fat, hogs get slaughtered” idea, but not even that. Well, literally that, I guess. But also there’s humanity and compassion as a force. It’s sweet and nice.

As always, prose is spot on, clear and direct without being boring, and you write great female leads. I wouldn’t say no to a quick epilogue, but I can imagine!
1 year

Health: info on wim hof breathing



Munchies:
I'm actually a Christian.

That said, if someone is making health claims, then they need to have proof they actually work. There's a lot of snake oil out there that at best doesn't do what it claims and at worst actively harms someone.

Weetabix:
'Science' is no longer proof. It's so heavily biased towards the interests of the people funding the research that it needs to be considered an opinion.

I'd much rather go with anecdotal experiences of people who are actually trying to improve their own health. It's not proof either but there is no proof so give up on that.

If you really want to know if something works you would have to try it yourself having read and watched as much as you can about the treatment.

It's OK to believe in God, the proof is all around us. Don't believe in science, prove things yourself to your own satisfaction.



What could go wrong! 😂
1 year

Giving up on vegetarianism

Letters And Numbers:
I gained weight when I stopped eating meat. I think it’s a lot easier to eat lean meat and feel full than on a low carb veggie diet. But I’m not looking to go back to eating meat for that reason (although I have thought about it). I guess you have way more fast food options as a meat eater.

Startergainer01:
That's interesting. Thank you. I'm not just quitting vegetarianism for weight gain sake, though. Thank you for the recommendation.


Oh, I would hope you’d have a better reason for it cause, you know, cake and donuts fit into a vegetarian diet just fine!
1 year

The truth (husband not an fa)

Seven8the9:
I'm at a crossroads and am looking for insight/advice.

My husband (we've known each other 8+ years) is not an FA. I'm a large woman of 246lb, and short. I also have medical conditions that make gaining weight easy and losing hard, despite medical intervention.

I confirmed this by reading his journals in which he writes about not being attracted to me when we first met (I was 20lb lighter then). And how he worries about my health. And how I've tried so many things to lose weight, but not "the obvious" of working out and "just going to the gym". He also wrote extensively of wanting an athletic partner. How it's a must for him.

It gets a bit more complicated.

I KNOW that reading his journal was wrong, and I have not in all the 8+ years. However, we are trying to conceive, with me going through fertility treatment right now. I decided to go against my morals and read the journal, to see if he truly felt ready and willing to have kids. I guess look, and you will find...

Ironically, he didn't mention any hesitations in the journal over trying for kids.

I have my own long history of body image issues, and now this is compounded by learning of his true feelings about my weight. Not to mention the weight I may gain during and after pregnancy. He's a fit guy. He's known about my weight issue, self image issues, and non-athleticism for our entire relationship. I truly thought he was an FA, but now I see he was envisioning me as "lithe and healthy" in the future.

Our sex life is good; emotionally and romantically, we are great.

It's just this one BIG area that hurts like open wound.

Do I tell him I read his journal? Do we put off having kids? It feels obvious that we should for now. Do I tell him about my desire to BE desired for my fatness? These are huge things to consider... and what was feeling like a strong bond between us now feels pretty much at risk.

Really would appreciate any advice, even if it calls me out on my shortcomings in this situation.


This might be stating the obvious, but if you were only 20 lbs lighter when you met 8 years ago, and he’s not attracted to bigger people, you must have an awful lot of other things going for you that he DOES find very attractive, right? Maybe pure physical attraction isn’t one of the top things he looks for in the person he wants to spend his life with. Could that be the case? I feel like there’s more to this story.
1 year

Giving up on vegetarianism

I gained weight when I stopped eating meat. I think it’s a lot easier to eat lean meat and feel full than on a low carb veggie diet. But I’m not looking to go back to eating meat for that reason (although I have thought about it). I guess you have way more fast food options as a meat eater.
1 year

Ai images



Munchies:

That said, Photoshop isn't inherently theft, unlike AI art. It's gotten so bad that artists - some of whom use Photoshop - are turning to programs like Glaze to prevent art theft.



Letters And Numbers:
I didn’t say anything about Photoshop being theft. You should reread the conversation. You were talking about artificial beauty standards and I said that Photoshop gets used interchangeably with airbrush when you’re talking about how pictures (mostly of women) online and in magazines are doctored. Which is not the software’s fault, it’s the magazine editor, etc. it’s a human problem, the software is just software. A paintbrush is just a paintbrush. They’re tools.

Munchies:
Earlier in the conversation, people, including myself, said that AI art is theft. This is why I brought it up, and why I am making the distinction.

The theft is baked into the software's programming. To talk about AI art without the theft is to paint an incomplete picture. The only way for the software to work is by scraping data - mostly without consent. The program cannot exist without it.

This is different from airbrushing (which isn't inherently Photoshop, but for the sake of arguement, we'll say that it is). The software isn't inherently one thing or another. It's a tool that humans control to achieve whatever outcome they want.

Letters And Numbers:
AI art software is 2 years old, commercially, right? If there was AI software that only scraped Getty images, for example, and had a license to do that, it would not be theft (really copyright infringement or violations of fair use statutes), correct? The fact that it doesn’t currently work this way today doesn’t mean that’s not where it’s headed. Cars in 1910 didn’t have seatbelts. They all do now, and it’s because people were damaged and standards were set. Fair use is probably the most immediate problem with AI, but also the easiest to solve. But it’s a real problem! And the current Supreme Court is very on the side of the original copyright holder as seen in the Prince/Warhol case this year. Only Kagen and Roberts dissented. There’s a 1st amendment case on the other side, too, though. If scraping scans of magazines to get images for AI is theft (it’s not, legally, it might be copyright infringement or violations of fair use statutes), so is the the kid in her bedroom cutting up magazines to make a collage. It’s just a different application, but I don’t get my blood pressure up about people making collages, even with very famous images. I don’t get upset about samples in hip hop. If the record company wants to pay to clear them, that’s great, but ultimately as the listener, I kinda don’t care about a 2 second sample. I think it’s transforming the sample into something new. I don’t think a bar band should have to pay Creedence Clearwater Revival every time they play a cover of Proud Mary. But if they’re going to commercially release an album of cover songs they probably need the mechanical rights to do so. I think Negativland is great and they made art and I don’t care that they pissed off U2’s publishing company. But they’re complicated questions. I think, at least. It’s a good discussion here, sincerely!

Munchies:
I've explained the situation in detail and included sources. I am not sure if you read my sources, or there's something I am not explaining well. But the things you are talking about aren't comparable to what I am talking about.

The AI art programs are not just scraping from big publications or magazines. They are also scraping from smaller creators. I'm talking about people who make art for a living or side hustle. In fact, programs like Glaze were made specifically for these people in mind. (It's in the article.)

And if you think it's okay for these programs to scrape their hard work for the software to have data, then I have nothing more to say to you.


I think we mostly agree, actually (and I said as much on the first page of this thread). I don’t think AI scraping will work the same way at all in 5 or 10 years. We’re in an adjustment period. In a year Amazon went from having no policy about AI content to a very weak policy, and I expect by next year they will have a much more robust policy. That’s just one example but it’s all happening very fast.

I do think it raises interesting questions about fair use the same way collages or sampling or prints of Campbell’s Soup cans do. I expect AI cases to hit the Supreme Court within a couple of years. They will be interesting to follow.
1 year