It depends if she wants to gain or not.

I adore BBWs too much to humiliate them. When someone asks me to do it, I am not very good at it.

It depends on how the joke is made. I was at a NAAFA convention where there were signs all over the elevators saying "testing in progress." We were joking that the testing involved filling the elevators with fat people and seeing if they failed or not.

However, one greeting card company came out with a card saying, "I exercise as much as the next guy, if the next guy is a fat lazy slob." Assuming that anyone who is fat is lazy and a slob is not OK.

Feedees and feeders do not represent the majority of the fat acceptance people. Most fat people do not want to be fat, and do not eat extra for the sake of gaining.

I would not tell anyone. They don't need to know, since it is mostly a sexual fetish. When they comment, just say that you don't mind being fat, and that you are quite happy the way you are. Some may figure it out, and if they ask you, then you can admit to it, but only if you want that person to know.

Generally, the clothing industry considers BBW size 14 and up, and SSBBW as size 28W and up. Of course, no matter how you do it, there will always be problems.

Maybe she thinks that you don't like the extra weight, so you should at least let her know that you don't mind the extra weight. From that reaction, you can let her know you actually prefer her heavier. She may be relieved and eat more. As long as you don't push her, she should not mind.

I knew of one feedee who went from 200 something to over 600. When she refused to keep gaining, he left her for someone who was still actively gaining. She was unable to support herself and had to live with her parents. She finally had weight loss surgery, and died from the complications. Don't assume you can reach a point where he will be happy, and don't assume you can lose the weight once you gain it.

Gaining weight at an older age is more risky, although if you do a search, you can find some older feedees. I knew one woman who turned into a feedee at age 40 when she already weighed 500 pounds. At an older age, thin or fat, is usually when things start to go wrong. Women especially are more likely to have arthritis and similar problems that can be painful.

The bad guys keep getting rejected, so they keep contacting more people. The good guys find a few friends and remain friends. So, in my opinion, it just seems that there are more bad people. Even if you meet a lot of bad people, it takes only one special person. So, my advice is to stick around. Report bad people and block them.

Well, if you are doing anything for Halloween, now is the time to "dress up like a fat person." Otherwise, if you can't come out and say it, you can always make a joke. Or just say, "I've always wondered what it would feel like to be much heavier." In other words, just go a little at a time, and be able to retract if it does not go well. But being straight forward also sounds like a good idea.