It would be good communitybuilding practice for everyone to report to the pic owners when they see them being used elsewhere. Then the pic owner can decide whether or not to act on it.

I saw this in New Scientist and was totally fascinated. I wonder if they'll actually figure out what's going on.

If you haven't read it, do--it's surprising and cool.

I had someone threaten me once. It's a horrendous feeling. I think it's important to stop the person however one can. I know the site will do what it can. And often enough, the threat of a lawyer is enough to change someone's bad habits...

I agree that 'size acceptance' and 'fat acceptance' are weak phrases, and they suggest tolerance rather celebration, as Babybelly points out. I don't use them. I prefer 'fat activism', 'size liberation', and other similarly active and activist ideas.

@grim: I agree that there are feeders who are as coercive and as exploitative as any diet monger. My problem with the idea that you can't be thoughtful and positive about your body and still want to change it is that we don't think the same about any other practice. For example, if someone wants more piercings or tattoos, we don't think they're insecure. Of course some people gain from a place of insecurity. But can't it be possible to gain from a place of security, joy, celebration? I think it can.

There was an episode of Trini and Susannah What Not to Wear that had a big guy, and they did some sharp stuff with him. I'd love to find it, actually.

I think it depends a lot on the style you're going for, but one really great look is a tee and jeans/trousers of the same colour, with a shirt/sweater/jacket open over it in a brighter, contrasting colour or print.

If you do a google image search for 'large men fashion' you get some good stuff.

Can you maybe try a low-key exercise program rather than weight loss? Most of the things that are associated with weight are even more closely linked to exercise.

@canadian and joswitch: if you would take a deep breath and read each other's posts, you are not disagreeing.

As for how many women are sensitive about our size? I think that's up for grabs. I don't think it's as widespread as chubbyhoney thinks, nor do I think it's as widespread as it once was. I still think it's a majority, and I think--as someone, maybe joswitch?, pointed out--it can be a surface self-acceptance with sensitivity underneath.

But if you put everything that's been said together:

1. you don't compliment anyone, woman or man, on her/his size without knowing them well and knowing in advance how they'll take it.

2. it is perfectly reasonable, if a natural opportunity arises, for an FA to say that s/he likes a partner with a bit of meat to him/her. And there are ways to say that that don't include words someone might find insulting. 'I don't find sticks attractive,' or 'I think too many people are too thin'. It doesn't have to be creepy to express a preference, if you're careful.