See someone from real life on fantasy feeder!

I have met some of the (very lovely) people here at the Club Indulge nights in London, which are rather splendid.
8 years

How to spot ffa in 3 minutes?


this site used to have dating ads, not sure if it still does.


I think that one can put "dating" information in one's profile, but the search function is quite limited.
8 years

Join dates?

The joining dates for some members seem a little off: mine claims that I joined over 20 years ago, yet I didn't even have the internet in 1995, let alone did FF exist...
8 years

Self control

This topic reminds me of this:
8 years

Easter indulge - 18th april uk

That is such a splendid costume idea.
9 years

Fantasy feeder version 2

Is it not possible just to tell one's mobile telephone to request the desktop version of the site? Certainly, Firefox mobile can do that.
9 years

Fifty shades of fat?!

I'd rather use whips on cream than people.
9 years

Microwave petition * pls help*

Some microwave ovens can leak, but this is rare, and there are inexpensive detectors that can be bought to prevent this. Microwave radiation is non-ionising: the only danger to people is that it can cook one from the inside. If he is worried, just get one of the detectors.

Incidentally, I recommend the Panasonic microwave ovens that have an inverter.
9 years

I'm a feminist

tamaghis wrote:
mrman1980uk wrote:
Is it not fundamental to the principle of equality of treatment that there are no places where one or other sex ought to be the main focus or in control?


In theory, yes. In practice there are so many instances of hidden discrimination that it sometimes (understatement?) it is fairer to become aware of these differences, and start treating people differently to account for their different treatment in other contexts.


This purported difference between theory and practice is misconceived, and is often an attempt to circumvent analysis. If the theory is descriptive, if it differs from the reality which it describes, the theory is simply wrong. If it is prescriptive, and the practice that it prescribes is different from it, then the practice is wrong in so far as the theory is right (and the rightness of the theory is not determined by the practice).

Also, the idea that unequal treatment can somehow "account for", in general terms, other unequal treatment is equally misconceived. It is impossible to have equal outcomes without equal treatment, as how people are treated is necessarily an important part of every outcome.

The only reason that sexism is wrong in the first place is because the difference in treatment has no rational basis. The reason that makes it wrong necessarily applies to every such case, so it is logically incoherent to claim that difference in treatment on the grounds of sex is justified because others unjustifiably differ in their treatment of others on the ground of sex. When so stated, the absurdity is plain. Indeed, those demanding inequality in the name of equality should be subject to the greatest of suspicion as to their motives, as much of the purported reasoning deployed in favour of such assertions is inherently sectarian and/or bigoted.

mrman1980uk wrote:
The people who cause the problems are the people who think that it matters what sex that people are, except in the very specific situations when it really does (i.e., those necessarily connected to the actual biological difference between the sexes).

Not necessarily, often it is those who claim there is no issue who are most susceptible to implicit discrimination. A heightened awareness can counteract stereotypes or lead to procedures that minimise (implicit) discrimination

Also, real life is incredibly complex and messy. For example, having names on applications often leads to discrimination against woman and ethnic minorities, anonymised applications are better, however may lead to other factors playing a role, e.g. Less experience due to baby years. In an ideal world, a significant number of men might take baby years, and so it wouldn't significantly discriminate one sex, but in the current world it does. So we need to ask whether this amount of experience is really necessary, or it would be less discriminatory to look at a wider sample of applicants/using applicants gender to counterweight some of the imbalances.[/quote]

There is a fundamental difference between claiming that "there is no issue" (i.e., that others do not irrationally distinguish on the ground of sex) and stating that the people who cause the problems are those that think that it matters what sex that people are except when it is biologically relevant: the latter explicitly acknowledges, whereas the former explicitly denies, that there do or may exist bigots who improperly discriminate on the ground of sex (and the same applies equally to all bases on which people may irrationally discriminate).

Your example, I am afraid, does not make any kind of coherent case in favour of discrimination on the ground of sex other than where strictly biologically relevant. Either having more experience genuinely does make the candidate a better employee, in which case it is wrong to prohibit an employer from choosing a candidate on that basis, or it does not, in which case the problem is irrational discrimination on the ground of experience and sex has nothing to do with it. If the issue is that employers might be concerned about a gap in employment history because a person has looked after children, then, again, either this is a genuine cause for concern, in which case it is wrong to prohibit employers treating it as such, or it makes no difference in reality, and it is discrimination on the ground of parental career breaks, not sex, that is the issue. It is irrelevant whether, in fact, as things stand, discrimination against people who have taken career breaks to raise children adversely affects women more than men: if it is not wrong, the differential effect is irrelevant, and, if it is wrong, the prohibition of it would benefit women in the precise proportion in which they suffer detriment. There is no justification anywhere for taking specific account of anyone's sex.
9 years

I'm a feminist

Murphy wrote:
flyinghorse wrote:
To say a man cannot be a feminist is like saying the only people who can cure cancer are those who have cancer.

For me, we can all support equality. I don't care if your male, female or you choose not to have a gender, the choice is yours and your support is welcome.

People have also asked me why i'm a feminist? I always answer; I was raised by a single mother, the question ought to be how could I be anything but a feminist?


While I agree with you for the most part, I do also feel that it's not a man's place to interject himself into spaces where women are (and should be) the main focus and in control. So I defer to the women in feminist spaces on whether or not I should call myself a feminist, or a feminist ally, or something else; it is antithetical if I identify myself in a way that makes women uncomfortable.

I will, in general, call myself a feminist, because that's a quick and easy identifier of my basic beliefs here, but if asked to do otherwise by feminist women, I'm more than happy to change that label in their spaces.


Is it not fundamental to the principle of equality of treatment that there are no places where one or other sex ought to be the main focus or in control?

The people who cause the problems are the people who think that it matters what sex that people are, except in the very specific situations when it really does (i.e., those necessarily connected to the actual biological difference between the sexes).
9 years
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