Canuck:
this is a topic that i really relate to. i was a thin, fit feeder for so much of my adult life. i started gaining by accident, and haven't really been able to stop it since.

i've posted about my experience over the last 4 or 5 years, so i won't rehash all that. but i wanted to talk about how lifestyle contributes to this. i sympathize with @otherday66 because i've tried to go back the gym a few times, i've tried to change my diet a few times over the years (including this year) and for the most part it hasn't been successful.

part of it is how seductive the feedist lifestyle is... it's kind of built on pleasure, abandon, and sloth. to move to a mode of discipline, effort and abstinence (from food!) is a really hard change to make. and it's too easy to be tempted back into indulgence, i find (again, and again...).

i'd be interested to hear from anyone who has found success in striking that balance after going to the fat-side?

Enas:
I was not talking about political beliefs at all here! I was talking more in how people live their every day lives. I remember i had seen the phrase but i cant recall where, "People dont live their lives, theyre just reacting to them". Which means every day Behavior is not the result of a logical thought process but instead is the result of people reacting instantly without thinking at all, so the quality of the behavior will corespond to that.

Reactionaries are people who do that in their political lives too, instead of only in their every day ones.

Morbidly A Beast:
I don’t think that is correct I believe human beings are capable of discerning their actions and are morally culpable for their actions, it’s not just reaction to stimuli

Head asses like the ones who critiqued our friend here after gaining a few lbs saw that they had gained weight and wanted to tease them thinking they might be motivated to lose weight cause they care about them, presumably, but this is wrong headed. And should be called out as it, bullying.

Enas:
Well, you might believe that but what do you actually know that can support it?

On the other hand, i know that at least there is a pretty good argument suporting the position that ordinary people are Evil: ?si=zVG8EjTJ95-i9Gaa

Furthermore, to answer to your i see all the time that people are delusional, they are not aware of the actual reality. They prefer to believe happy lies than, at least attempt to confront their material situation. They make excuses, they get defensive when they know they cant form a good argument. They fully accept the passive ideology that society pushes onto them.

To put it bluntly, most people are pure shit.

Its, unfortunately, right as Marx put it. On one pole there is the acumulation of wealth. And on the other pole there is the acumulation of mysery and mental degredation.

People can learn to have the qualities you mentioned, of course! But... where do you see them being practiced?

And by the way, calling people out, in situations like this does have an immediate positive outcome, but it also has a negative one. And its that it does not actually solve the problems, but its seen as something that does! So the actual problems (that generate bigotry, in general) remain mostly unnoticed!

Its not enough to reduce fatphobes to head asses,because they are the result of far larger underlying problems.

Enas:
I was not talking about political beliefs at all here! I was talking more in how people live their every day lives. I remember i had seen the phrase but i cant recall where, "People dont live their lives, theyre just reacting to them". Which means every day Behavior is not the result of a logical thought process but instead is the result of people reacting instantly without thinking at all, so the quality of the behavior will corespond to that.

Reactionaries are people who do that in their political lives too, instead of only in their every day ones.

Sweetannaxxl:
Took a small break from doing anything, and visiting the site due to some criticism from outside sources. It really took a toll on me and made me feel negatively about myself. I have gained a substantial amount of weight in a relatively small timeframe and must have come as a shock to my peers, which prompted some discomfort in conversation. My question i guess is how do I deal with this? I have no genuine interest in losing the weight, I know it won’t make me happy, but being ridiculed for my size is ridiculous. Does anyone have any good tips for shrugging it off?

Munchies:
So, I want to add a little bit of nuance to this conversation.

If you are getting very fat very quickly, it's normal to be concerned. Sudden rapid weight gain is usually not a good sign of things. Usually, people think severe depression or illness. It may be good to reassess how fast you're gaining as rapid gains are not sustainable and can lead to later weight loss.



No amount of concern excuses any kind of body shaming or bullying. Since these are your friends, be honest with them. Tell them how you feel about what they are saying and doing. If they are really your friends, they will respect this. If not, then these are not people you need in your life.

Morbidly A Beast:
This is the correct take. Its times like this i wish i could react to a forum post without typing out a message

Enas:
I have made a suggestion to the site owner that kind of includes that (altho not for its own sake)

Munchie's take is not sufficient. Everyone else's takes are not even serious.

Neoliberal individualism leads in a toxic atomization where its not appropriate to care for other people's businesses.

Also, very few people are actually capable of that in the first place. Most are acting in a reactionary manner.

Sweetannaxxl:
Took a small break from doing anything, and visiting the site due to some criticism from outside sources. It really took a toll on me and made me feel negatively about myself. I have gained a substantial amount of weight in a relatively small timeframe and must have come as a shock to my peers, which prompted some discomfort in conversation. My question i guess is how do I deal with this? I have no genuine interest in losing the weight, I know it won’t make me happy, but being ridiculed for my size is ridiculous. Does anyone have any good tips for shrugging it off?

Munchies:
So, I want to add a little bit of nuance to this conversation.

If you are getting very fat very quickly, it's normal to be concerned. Sudden rapid weight gain is usually not a good sign of things. Usually, people think severe depression or illness. It may be good to reassess how fast you're gaining as rapid gains are not sustainable and can lead to later weight loss.



No amount of concern excuses any kind of body shaming or bullying. Since these are your friends, be honest with them. Tell them how you feel about what they are saying and doing. If they are really your friends, they will respect this. If not, then these are not people you need in your life.

Jeromekayla6658:
Not my style lol. You tend to not stay married very long when you do things without the wife’s permission 🤣