Hydrargyrumrabbit:
Not to sound bleak, but feedism reminds me of that show Dexter.. not the whole murdering part, lol, but in it he refers to his urges as his 'dark passenger', & I tend to agree to a point. Without going too far into details, I committed myself to a weight loss journey this year.. had back issues, wanted that sorted, so I sucked it up when I moved and full sent a lifestyle change.
Even then, however, the voice in the back of my mind has never once disappeared or quieted. In fact, as I lost weight, the louder it got about how I disliked these changes. I enjoy being big, the heft, the jiggles. To the point where I daily question just giving in & 'full sending' the other direction, barring keeping my back in check with exercise.
Lol.. at this point, I suppose I'm just trying to find a happy middle ground. Where can I maintain a grasp on what I *want* and what I *need* & I guess that's as much as any of us can do. The unfortunate fact of life is rarely do those two points ever cleanly cross.
You've illuminated the problem with Feederism very clearly here. Maybe the problem with life in general. It's probably best to compromise but then the big winners in life often don't compromise, they maximise.
You're still very fat and your back is a lot better. To maximise this you'd continue to strength your back in order to still be strong whilst you gain more weight.
You looked fantastic at 400lbs, imagine getting over 400 but with your back feeling as good as it does now.
Your weight is likely to pile on again so it would be wise to keep with the exercises.
