Interesting fact about fat fetish

Munchies:
These are two different things.

I'm talking about liking the actual person. You are talking about liking the body said person inhabits. These two things are very unrelated.

AskDrFeeder:
When I'm interested in a relationship with a woman I want both. The fact that you have a thing for her size does not mean you can't appreciate her on other levels.

Of course it is possible for a man to fetishize a woman for her size and not love her or even like her, and she should reject such a man (unless she just wants a roll in the hay!). But having a preference for curvy women certainly doesn't eliminate the possibility of liking or loving her.


Like I said. These are two completely different things.

I'm in community with a lot of plus-sized women who are not feedists. I've heard horror story after horror story of these women getting into relationships with fat fetishists (either knowingly or unknowingly), only for things to go sideways.

Examples include attempts to manipulate them into the lifestyle, losing their minds if they decide to lose weight, or being more interested in their bodies than anything else.

It wears on a person to be objectified like this. So, instead of continuously taking a chance on fat fetishists, they'll swear them off entirely just to be safe. And considering what I have seen from fat fetishists in the community losing their God damned minds when dating a non-feedist, I get where they are coming from.

This is not to say it can't work out. Sometimes it does.

That said, women who want to be in relationships want to be valued for out personhood first and our body second. It is dangerous for us to be with someone who prizes our bodies too much.
4 months

Interesting fact about fat fetish

Munchies:
Women do not want a "superior" partner. Women want a partner that's on our level. We don't want a partner we have to parent, and we don't want a partner that treats us like a parent. This holds true for traditional and feminist women.


I basically agree, though I think there are exceptions.

I think Weetabix is somewhat right, though, in that there are some people (of any gender) who are so down on themselves they won't respect anyone who likes them, and thus reject people who might be great. But I certainly wouldn't generalize that to all BBWs.

Munchies:
I, a woman, understand women better than both of you.

AskDrFeeder:
Ah yes, the often fallacious "Argument from Authority".

Munchies, if there were an Understanding Women test and we both took it, you might very well score higher. But I bet I'd get some of the questions you missed. Just because you're a woman doesn't mean you're always right in any discussion with a man about women, especially particular women.


I'm not saying men can't understand women. I'm saying that you, specifically, do not understand women as much as you think you do. This is evident by how you are discussing women.

You may not realize this, but you are not looking at women as if we are people. You are looking at us like we are a different species. And it is laughable when you say to a women who is in community with other women that I don't know what I'm talking about.
4 months

"soft girl"

AskDrFeeder:
Been reading about the "soft girl" trend. I know it's not "soft" in the sense that fat bodies are soft, but I wonder if there's any overlap between soft girls and feedees. Anyone?

JN_TumLover56:
I think I have heard that it’s a long the lines of being a softie compared to someone who has a strong face and sturdy. If that’s one way to say it?


Eh, no. My comment gives a brief overview of the soft girl lifestyle. It has nothing to do with facial features or body shape. You can have a strong face and sturdy body while having a soft life. On the flip side, you can have softer features and a willowy body without being part of the soft life.
4 months

"soft girl"

AskDrFeeder:
Been reading about the "soft girl" trend. I know it's not "soft" in the sense that fat bodies are soft, but I wonder if there's any overlap between soft girls and feedees. Anyone?


For those not in the know, the "soft girl" trend is a Gen Z lifestyle/aesthetic that is a response to and rejection of the girl boss lifestyle/aesthetic.

While the girl boss is all about being cool, dominant, and self-sufficient, the soft girl is cute, preppy, and pampered. The idea behind being a soft girl is that life sucks, so it's best to find someone to take care of you instead.

To answer the OP's question, I will say that some feedees certainly ascribe to the soft life, either in whole or in part. But that has less to do with being a feedee and more to do with traditional gender roles.
4 months

Interesting fact about fat fetish


And women routinely enjoy love confessions unless it's from someone we do not want.

AskDrFeeder:
You'd think so, but I've definitely read statements by BBWs saying they don't want guys who have a thing for fat women (let alone gaining women!). I guess such women fear being fetishized.

Weetabix:
Yes this is the point Munchies does not get.

Women want to look up to the man. The man must be better than the woman. If the woman is down on herself for being fat (not necessarily BBW in FF but normies) then a man who likes them is actually lower than they are.

If you think about it everyone wants the best partner that they can get. Having someone your equal would be fair but you actually want most the very best. If a BBW is to you the very best and they think they're the very worst they will be turned off by low status of you showing them they're better than you.

For me I find the conventionally attractive women the easiest to talk to because I don't really care, they're OK but not particularly exciting to me. This makes them attracted to me. By contrast approaching a BBW generally goes badly because of my hightened attraction to them. I care too much and it shows, putting me in a very low status. Very low because they already think poorly of themselves.


Spoken like a man who does not understand women at all. Then again, you've proven this a million times before.

Women do not want a "superior" partner. Women want a partner that's on our level. We don't want a partner we have to parent, and we don't want a partner that treats us like a parent. This holds true for traditional and feminist women.

I, a woman, understand women better than both of you.
4 months

Interesting fact about fat fetish


And women routinely enjoy love confessions unless it's from someone we do not want.

AskDrFeeder:
You'd think so, but I've definitely read statements by BBWs saying they don't want guys who have a thing for fat women (let alone gaining women!). I guess such women fear being fetishized.


These are two different things.

I'm talking about liking the actual person. You are talking about liking the body said person inhabits. These two things are very unrelated.

You are not your body. You inhabit your body, but you are not, in and of itself, your body. Your body is subject to change at any given point for a number of reasons, but who you are as a person is far less ephemeral.
4 months

Does everyone here get turned on by fat or gaining?

Personally, I wanna see some posts from people who don't get turned on by fat or gaining.

I think it would be funny. For science.
4 months

What ya listening to?

Bumpy ride by Mohombi

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Murder on My Mind by Kordhell

4 months

Interesting fact about fat fetish

Weetabix:
I think it's more than 4%. More like 20%. Getting men to admit they like fat girls is difficult. It's also difficult for men who like fat girls to get with fat girls. The fact you like a woman turns her off.


I will agree with you that a lot of guys who like fat women will not admit to it for a variety of women. Not sure about the 20%, but I can't disprove it either.

With that said, liking a women being a turn of for her makes not a lick of sense.

If you liking a woman is a turn off for her, that means she never liked you.

As a general statement, people like people who like them. That's basic human nature. And women routinely enjoy love confessions unless it's from someone we do not want.
4 months