Loudsecret123:
I have lived my whole life knowing and being comfortable with my gender as a cisgender male, but this fetish has confused some things. I have eventually come to realise that I may not just be a feeder, but maybe a feedee as well. Though the idea of gaining weight as a male doesn't intrigue me at all, the idea as a female does. I do not experienece genderdyphoria and this experinece of emotions is purely gender envy fueled by sexual desires. I've spoken to many of my trans friends and they say most people don't transition just on the basis of gender envy but also gender dysphoria. But my friends don't have this fetish, and like a lot of people say about feedism 'this isn't a fetish, it's a lifestyle'. So does this fetish make an exception for transitioning without gender dysphoria?
Okay, sooo, your friends are kinda half right on the "most people don't transition just on the basis of gender envy but also gender dysphoria" at most. Is it common for a trans person to have dysphoria? Totally, but it often gets very hard to kinda pin down what is gender dysphoria and what isn't. Is me being uncomfortable having someone acknowledge my masculinity dysphoria? For some it would just be an acknowledgement that some guys are feminine, while in my case it was part of a big complicated puzzle hinting that it was actually me experiencing my own style of dysphoria. It's why in trans circles gender euphoria is a better indicator of trans identity. What makes you happy? Is painted nails, long styled hair and a lovely flowing dress something that excites you to be? Is being addressed as a Ms/Miss/Mrs while being socially acknowledged as a woman something that makes you feel seen? Is a feminised voice, softer skin and softer features something that feels more right? Of course there are countless ways to be a woman, but, most trans women do settle on some things that make them happy to be a woman.
I think the biggest worry for me reading is I definitely would not recommend someone to transition purely based on a fetish. Half because results will vary. Not all fat trans women will have even moderately sized breasts or have a feminine figure. The results you do get will be difficult and expensive too. Electrolysis, for a while I tried it (I stopped for unrelated reasons) to help deal with facial hair, was £250 a month to have each individual hair in my face torn out and then cauterised with electricity. It was expensive and painful! After six months of it I was maybe at most 1/4 through it, so, you may be looking at £10,000 and many many many hours of agony to be in a good position. Probably more tbh! If your idea of womanhood is to have facial hair, then I really wish you well, as if your idea is to not have stubble there is only so much shaving and make-up will do without laser hair treatment/electrolysis (the former is temporary, the latter is permeant, both expensive, painful and take a long time). The other half is once your lust dies down in the day, you have to live with who you are. For me, I adore being a woman. It is a beautiful and wonderful feeling of warmth and feeling like an actual person and I always love it. If you're a cis guy chasing womanhood because of your feedee fetish then you will have to deal with people seeing you as a woman when you're not sexually driven. You have to deal with people seeing you as trans as well, as a lot of places and people do not really like trans people at all.
That said, I definitely recommend trying it to see if you like it. Start with inconsequential acts. Play with pronouns, be called a she or a her by your friends, maybe find a name you love. Buy some make-up and clothes, see if you like what you see. Sexuality is an intrinsic part of gender, so I definitely wouldn't say totally look beyond it, but I'd try to work out if sexuality and all other parts of you enjoys feminising yourself. If it is just sexuality, that's okay, it can be you enjoy sexually being a woman but your non-sexual life being a guy. There's a lot of ways to approach gender.
