A bit too on the nose for my taste...

I don't know, sometimes you introduce someone to a new thing and they don't like it.

Good question, but I'd rather do one question at a time!



I'm not talking about just introducing someone to a new thing, I'm talking about the case where you introduce them to a new thing and they get into it. If you don't want to call that "teaching", fine by me but your term doesn't quite work either.

Good question, but I'd rather do one question at a time!



I think that's usually true, but it does happen sometimes. They'll try it and find they like it. Maybe you don't want to call that "teaching" but it's a thing.

Some ideas I posted some time ago:

fantasyfeeder.com/pics/photo

Ha! I'm divorced. But it's just a fantasy anyway. Even when I was married I had those.

I have imagined being in a relationship with two slender women who find out I'm a feeder who compete for my affections, each one trying to gain more weight than the other. Maybe if one falls too far behind we tie her up and force feed her or whatever--there are many variations.

I've heard this story many times. A person has no interest in feedism but is persuaded to try it by their feeder. They gain some and by their partner's reaction realize how erotic feedism can be. It starts to turn them on, and before you know it they appreciate gaining on its own merits. They'll want to continue even if they break up with their partner.

Has this happened to you? Can you add any details? (I've heard of this happening many times but no one seems to be able to describe it very well. )

I've always thought if you push it too hard it becomes a chore, and it's a shame to turn it into a chore when it can be so much fun.

What a lot of people do is alternate stuffing days with days where they just eat what they feel like. That way you increase your capacity on the stuffing days, and just enjoy yourself the rest of the time.

It's not a race.

I got a letter on this topic on my old feedist advice site. Apparently my advice worked out:


What can I say...?

Dear Dr. Feeder,
My name is Amanda. Last year I began university, and because of this had to move away from home onto campus. One thing I had promised myself to do when I moved out of home was to gain weight. Since moving onto Campus I have just let myself go completely, and as a result gained 50lbs. However, this summer I will be visiting my mother back home whom is very into healthy eating, and so forth. Let me say right now that I am not loosing any weight whatsoever for her, nor do I intend to stop. But, I do not know what to say to her to avoid her from being too upset.
What can I say to prevent her from being too angry?--Amanda, April 2, 2009

Dear Amanda,
You may not be able to keep her from being angry. Settle for keeping her from nagging you to death. Try:

1. If she gets angry, DON'T get angry yourself.
2. If she asks why you gained, say it's because you like to eat and don't mind the extra weight.
3. If she asks you why you don't diet, say you've tried diets and have found you're happier eating what you want.
4. If she makes a comment about your weight that is not in the form of a question, don't respond.
5. If she says something mean, say "Now you're just being mean."

And remember the three NEVERs:

NEVER apologize for your gain;
NEVER apologize for your size;
NEVER apologize for your appetite.

If she tries to get you to eat healthy food (fruit & vegetables, etc.) go ahead and eat it. It will make her feel better. You can still eat your favorite goodies as well.
If she won't shut up about it, say 'look, I know you're just saying all this because you love me and you want what's best for me, and I appreciate that, but it's my decision and you need to respect that.'
Let me know how it goes!--Dr. Feeder

Dear Dr. Feeder,
Sorry for the long reply period, I only flew in a couple of days ago. As you can imagine, it wasn't great at all. But surprisingly I didn't feel down about it whatsoever! When I first gave my mother a hug, she put her hand on my stomach and patted and squeezed it, constantly glancing down at it. It was horribly awkward. For some reason I expected that would be it. Later that night she gave me a brief "discussion" about my weight and asked me if anything was wrong and so forth. I explained to her exactly what you suggested, that I was happy the way I was and didn't feel the need to diet. Amazingly though, that was it!
Thankfully, she hasn't said anything else yet about my weight which I'm very pleased with. Thank-you so much for your help - the food here is quite healthy, so for that reason I'm looking forward to returning home where I can eat what I like.
Again, thank-you so much for the wonderful advice,--Amanda, May 4, 2009

Dear Amanda,
You're welcome, I'm glad it worked out.--Dr. Feeder