A bit of backstory.

For all my life I've been an overweight male, but starting during my teenage years I found myself being attracted more to larger woman (either gaining or fat) and I even found myself wondering what it would be like to get fatter myself.

But for the usual reasons I never indulged in it, e.g. fears about my peers, society, family (who can be annoying, albeit in a concerned way not helped by the obsession with their own weight), whether I'd like the way I'd look/feel, etc.

However, years later I now find myself getting gradually fatter unintentionally through a combination of circumstances and lifestyle e.g. shift work, having to rely on fast food, etc.

In the last year I have already gained at least some weight to the point that when I sit down now I can find myself with a pair of moobs and a hanging gut which I can hold.

This year I expect to get even fatter as I will be relying even more on fast food and eating when I otherwise would not eat e.g. large breakfasts.

However, this also leaves me feeling ambivalent, on the one hand I may now be able to finally gain the weight I've wanted to for years with a somewhat justifiable reason/excuse for it because I wont/cannot really do anything about it unlike intentionally gaining weight.

But on the other hand while I no longer have to deal with the types of comments I had in school, I do still have other concerns such as how my family will react or worse whether I'll even end up liking my fatter self.

Has anyone else been gaining through a similar experience? How did you deal with it? Any tips or advice for someone gaining like this?

Thank you.