Dream lover

Hmm interesting. šŸ¤” Do you know someone in your life thatā€™s based on those particular features that you mentioned? Minus the Italian part of course.
2 hours

A different round

May I ask whatā€™s the difference in this contest this time?
2 days

Fat makes me feel safe from beauty standards

Adiprose:
Like many here, I first identified as a feeder, had "weird" thoughts imagining myself being fat, and tried to reject/suppress these feelings for years. The urges always come back...and now I know I'm really committed.

While fighting these urges, I attempted to bulk and gain muscle. I'm very thin, and I wanted a conventionally attractive, "bodybuilder" body. However, I failed consistently: I worked out during most of this time, but I could never eat enough.

I didn't have the motivation to eat so much clean food to give myself a body that *others* wanted, but I did not want.

Now, I have realized that I won't gain anything if I become muscular. I don't want to be thin and muscular. I want a soft, unique, unusual body that is huge.

The thought of eating anything that I want doesn't feel like short-sighted recklessness anymore, it feels like a perfectly valid choice for my body.

But the biggest shift for me is realizing just how much safer I'll feel knowing that, even if I wanted to, I could never become fit and muscular with no bodyfat. It would grant me so much release to know that letting it go was all that I could do and was absolutely the right choice. The permanence of it would fill me with warmth.

Does this resonate with anyone else?


Now Iā€™m not a genius, but based on what I read it seems like youā€™re someone who doesnā€™t want to feel pressured anymore from certain beauty standards.

While I personally donā€™t resonate with what youā€™re going through, I can understand the whole feeling about it. And yes, whatever kind of physique that you want is completely your choice in the end for how you wish to express yourself and be happy about it! Despite the world of self-improvement and (perhaps) social standards say otherwise.

Honestly I always welcome anyone to a site like this where they can feel more ā€œlike themselvesā€. Even if itā€™s with the weight gain or not, itā€™s all about feeling good and not guilty about anything.
3 days

Would you change what you eat f the foods you like gave you acne ?

If I ever do find out what food I was eating was in fact giving me bad facial acne then absolutely! But I also think that touching your face without washing your hands recently also was also a factor in that matter too.

But I have practically have had eaten the same now as I have back then, a bit more mindful now, but still.
5 days

I feel so small right nowā€¦

Munchies:
Your first mistake was watching Jubilee. That is not the place to go when it comes to thoughtful, respectful discussions with differences of opinion. This is where certain tribes of thought gather to duke it out.

There's a reason why there are so many Youtube videos and channels dedicated to clowning on Jubilee. You might find some thoughtful conversation, but it's rare.

It's best to educate yourself, form your own opinions based on what you've learned, and then keep it trucking. Not everyone's opinion is worth the two cents they give you to listen.


I appreciate the response. And yes itā€™s very true about how Jubilee is notoriously known for creating an unnecessary political sh*t shows. But for this I did had to prepare myself before watching and came to it with an open mind. I am aware that there are some channels around that react towards a Jubilee video, but I always think that those would normally yam about plus size people or anything cringe. šŸ˜…

But hey either way I am learning and continue to learn as I go on. Hey, even being in the forums here has gotten me a little bit of insight! Nowadays I do try and go on to expressing my opinion for what I think is the truth with that bit of nuance. While I am aware that society has that particular pressure and maybe even unfairnessā€¦ sometimes we do just gotta keep on racing.
2 weeks

I feel so small right nowā€¦

Well everyone it seems that my own confidence has taken a bit of a hit.

I have recently watched the ā€œFit vs. Fatā€ women edition of Middle Ground by Jubilee on YouTube.

youtu.be/u4gEBRSKi2E

While I did though that it was a pretty decent conversation and it was something that I mostly agreed with what was being discussed, not to mention it gave me that sense of delight how both sides agreed on certain topics. But the comment section thoughā€¦ quite the opposite.

Now this isnā€™t the first time nor the last that I have seen this before, especially in a Jubilee video when they talk about fat people. But this time it really ended up ruining the whole mood for me with people commenting about how ā€œblindā€ and ā€œdelusionalā€ the people on the panel were, plus the good old ā€œobese is unhealthyā€ comment that everyone familiar with by now. And of course there was people saying that too many people were making up ā€œexcusesā€ especially for saying how they used to think like so when they were fat. Oh, and I think a lot of people know that the hardest critic of fat people are those who used to be soā€¦ or most of the time.

Now yes there were some positive comments (or at least ones with a bit of nuance) of that video. But let me tell you at least 89% of them had a bit of a negative tone to them.

Even I tried to put in a well thought comment on it. Hereā€™s actually what I said:

ā€”

ā€œNow Iā€™ve said something similar to the one where they had with menā€¦ but one thing that Iā€™ve learned from watching this (and that) video and from personal experiences, no body is ever alike nor perfect. Sure health stuff does matter, but it should only be taken for personal reasonings not for anyone else outside of the matter.

I know many people have questioned body positivity in recent times, but thereā€™s one thing that Iā€™ve always stayed loyal to. Is that body positivity is choosing positivity and to learn to be grateful of your own skin and flaws. And whether or not if I wanted to changeā€¦ Iā€™m still thankful that my features are what make me, myself! ā¤ļø Now I do acknowledge that thereā€™s nothing wrong with losing weight, but itā€™s ALSO nothing wrong with being okay with yourself without changing yourself physically. After all self acceptance is just as important as self improvement! Thereā€™s a fine line between losing weight for looking after your wellbeing versus keeping up with social beauty standards.ā€

ā€”

As of right now it currently has about 25 likes (last time I checked). But compared with all the other comments that I have seen that had hundreds and thousands of likes, especially from the formerly fat people who have commentedā€¦ I was like ā€œHow do you compete with that!ā€ and I just completely exhausted myself mentally from seeing all of that.

Now Iā€™m not trying to get myself feel validated, not at all. Itā€™s more about getting my message out there hopefully to find some nuance or something like that. I do acknowledge that not every comment in that video is considered a hate comment when they are really being more critically truthful.

Either way it made me feel small and not really good about myself. Maybe itā€™s because I care too much, maybe itā€™s because of me liking bigger women I worry that one day Iā€™ll face a reality that they wonā€™t exist anymore or be banished from society. Or perhaps itā€™s a reminder that people like me belong under a rock.

Now I apologize if this was a long post. But I do have a lot to say about it. šŸ˜… I know that it also sounds a little downbeat but I think itā€™s because well it is a pretty deep topic. I bet the comments of this thread is gonna be interesting! I will always like bigger women and I will try to bring some of that kind of nuance to be an ally to plus size women. But in todayā€™s social climate, itā€™s getting difficult!

Anyways thanks for coming to my TED talk.
2 weeks

Stuffing vs inflating

As an FA and from my experience with the meetings and dating. I actually like both, but to answer your question I think I like the feeling the belly of someone who had bloated/inflated themselves. Even if itā€™s just them using their own breath to make their belly look more roundā€¦ sometimes about the tightness of the roundness of the extra air in there really turns me on.

Maybe itā€™s the fact that an inflate/bloat is just a temporary short time makes it that more satisfying to get your fix on my own tummy time cravings! šŸ˜… But thatā€™s just me though.
2 weeks

Light exercise?

Well as mundane as this sounds, from personal experience going on a walk (mostly) everyday helps out a lot to me. Especially when it comes to mental clarity and keeping ā€œyour juices flowingā€ and all that stuff.

You could practically do it at a park, shopping mall, or the comfort of your own neighborhood (if itā€™s safe to walk about). Itā€™s pretty much theoretically the kind of exercise that anyone of any body type can do. And if you want to make it fun you could go on a walk to a store to get yourself a drink or something and walk back.

Now sure thereā€™s plenty of other stuff like swimming and dancing thatā€™s a lot less boring and more vigorous. But sometimes a little exercise is all about the small steps to work on doing more and more. To me, itā€™s all about being able to move your body around!
2 weeks

Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

Enas:
Just to be clear, im more concerned with you being able to make solid arguments against criticism (of the stupid kind) on your fetish.


Thatā€™s understandable, I get what youā€™re trying to tell me. Lately Iā€™ve been trying to take things in a more nuanced way. Because I feel like discussions like that are more important than ever to find that sort of nuance.

Trying to balance between what you believe versus what the general public says isnā€™t an easy thing to do, especially when youā€™re trying to say something that almost everyone would agree (or have the most likes in a comment). I am aware that some people donā€™t always like what I have to say, but if people can at least acknowledge that I have a point in some degreeā€¦ I can live with that.
2 weeks

Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

Enas:
There is no reason to feel proud or ashamed for something you didnt conciously decided!

JN_TumLover56:
Well I certainly appreciate that.

Enas:
I hope you also understand the underlying logic!


Kinda. I have no shame for what I am attracted to. I mean I am what I find attractive too (hello it says in my username šŸ˜…). But I do have bad days at time.
2 weeks
12345   loading