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Farleysmom
8 years
I sleep during the 12 hours a week my Danish fat boy is in class.
Farleysmom
8 years
May send squirrel gifs to guys in Denmark and India. Will definitely send squirrel gif to American BHM who actually eats acorns...BHMS eating acorns, flour, baking powder, anything that qualifies as food, but just barely--HOT!
Farleysmom
8 years
Number of people who recently viewed my profile now equal to my I.Q. Pretty impressive for someone who attempted remove scalding water from my arm by licking it earlier this week. I really, seriously did that.
Farleysmom
8 years
Got rid of annoying young people using the magic of good music; am now listening to "Don't Bring Me Down" by Electric Light Orchestra with the volume turned down to 5.
Farleysmom
8 years
This song was in "Paul." "Are you gonna draw me like one of your French girls?" Definitely funnier when asked by Danish BHM on Kik....Seth Rogen used to be hot. The sex scene from "Zack and Miri"--OMFingG!!!
Farleysmom
8 years
Personals: Fat Re.ese Witherspoon lookalike with Julia Roberts smile seeks clean dinner plate....
Farleysmom
8 years
Now I need to think of something stupid to do to draw attention away from the first stupid thing I did. I think I'll get drunk and try to catch the family of raccoons in my chimney.
Farleysmom
8 years
Dammit! Sorry!
Farleysmom
8 years
Farley needs an outlet for his hyperactivity. I want to have him do dog bodybuilding. He will love it, it will seem like play to him. Most of the dogs on the website are pitbulls; as far as I know, I am the only person planning to teach bodybuilding to a pug. Pugs are genetically prone to becoming obese; people are already shocked at how fit Farley is at 3; will really enjoy shocking the sh*t out of people walking a ripped, muscular pug when I'm fat. LOL.
Farleysmom
8 years
Monday will be my birthday. I'm not going to get what I really want--a train full of BHMS. 
Farleysmom
8 years
Really want April 17th to be officially declared BHM Appreciation Day.
Ccwolf60
8 years
Well happy birthday to you 
and big belly hugs
and big belly hugs
Farleysmom
8 years
Young people were playing what seriously sounded like carnival music in the parking lot. I opened my window and am now blasting "Pour Some Sugar On Me" by Def Leppard with the volume turned up to 9. Those little f--kers are going to get classic rock, Sam and Dave, Ray Charles, REALLY old bluegrass...
Farleysmom
8 years
Am now playing "Hotel California" by the Eagles. This song is like krypton ite for young people. Mwahaha!
Farleysmom
8 years
I need to get "Twisting the Night Away" by Sam Cooke on CD. These kids will move to Holland. LOL
Farleysmom
8 years
They're going to hear really loud burping, too. It's on.
Farleysmom
8 years
Had to replace candy I couldn't resist eating even though I needed it to entice a grown man. #overweight FFA/female feeder problems
Farleysmom
8 years
Just realized that my profile said I'm a fat appreciator when I'm totally a feeder. D'oh! I fixed it.
Farleysmom
8 years
I love you, East Des Moines! Would have escaped from you on a raft made from a stolen portable toilet if i'd had to, but I'll love you till the day I die.
