I've officially gotten too fat to fit on one airplane seat in coach without blubber spilling to the seat next to me. Tease me in comments
I've been told I resemble dough that busted out of a biscuit can. Pass the butter! (Please tease me in comments)
I ate like a shameless, gluttonous hog but I bet nobody would ever guess that, right? Tease me in comments please
After devouring a roast ham and vat of buttered potatoes. Don't worry. There's room for desserts
Do these pants seem a bit tight to you? I think they give me a little muffin top. What do you think?
My partner and I are in the middle of a move. I don't have time for intense conversations or role play (see more in comments)