Chapter 16 - loving linda 2

At this point Linda began to cry, and quickly scurried into the kitchen, leaving me and my curry in the middle of a fairly crowded set of diners who had had quite a show!

"Your better off without her buddy!" a guy in a booth to my read volunteered..."She looks like she's gonna turn into a real cow!! Wait until she gets married...Oh boy!!"

Giving the clown a dirty look I got to my feet, and followed Linda, knowing what I had to do. I couldn't just let her walk away...not after all of this time, not after all of the searching...

"Linda!" ..."LINDA!" I hollered as I entererd the kitchen. "We need to talk...outside, on the phone, over dinner, wherever you want....I need to talk to you...I need you baby!! I love you!"

In the middle of the kitchen Linda was plating a tables entree's with other cooks and chefs interupted while doing their business staring. Linda looked tearfully up at me, but didn't tell me to leave.

"Do you want me to run this troll outta here girl" said one of the cooks raising a pan.

"No Sean, no thanks...He and I need to talk I guess....Jack...here is my number...please call me tomorrow....no...Friday.....but give me some time to think!"

As I left the kitchen with her number in my hand, Linda tearfully tasted a curry dish, telling the cooks to tone back the chilli peppers...

"She's gonna be a blimp pal...don't forget whud I toll ya!" My friend in the booth advised as I walked out into the street. I couldn't wait for Friday.

"I just don't know if it will ever work between us Jack...there is just too much water under the bridge!"

"Since when have you been into feeling by cliche?"

"Your funny....and I like that, but I have to tell you, I know you will tell me differently, but I just don't think you really want a big woman."

"Oh I hear you Linda, and I never did until we split...and even after that, I, er, um...took a while to realize it. I mean, everything in this society tells you liking a big girl is gross, and I fought my own feeling for years...all through High School and College, and it wasn't until I was with you...and God...I mean you weren't even chubby..."

"Compared to what, now, when I'm fat!! That's what I'm talking about Jack...that's exactly...."

"No Linda, your not fat at all..."

"Oh Jack, I know that. I know what FAT is....and the problem I have.."

"I mean your bigger than you were, but you aren't even as big as Jen...the girl you saw me with the other night...and your taller...so..."

"Keep digging Jack....the *** sign is starting to blink neon...."

"Linda...I have been dating bigger girls lately, like Jen, because I wanted to be comfortable with myself in case...."

"In case you ever decided to live an honest life? What the Hell Jack, what's wrong with liking Fat...Your family shouldn't care...I mean, it's not like your GAY or something..."

"But it is Linda...."

"How would you know ya Sally?"

"Will you quit it...I mean come on, I am trying to bare my soul for you here....and all you can do is joke...Liking fat girls must be almost like what it is to be Gay...I mean"

"Fat Girls now.....So you do think I'm fat..."

"Listen...I'm speaking figuritively, or perjoratively, or .."

"You been doing some reading lately haven't you Coach Jack....brushing up on your vocabulary..."

We were at a fancy Indian Resteraunt and Linda was now appearing to enjoy herself in that same style, that irreverent style, that she had always won me over with. Of course she was doing all of this bantering while she was eating, with more and more abandon. It was like this talk about fat had gotten her going, and even though she had only had one Flying Horse beer, her beautiful face and neck had that aroused ruddy glow I recognized from blissful nights in the past.

"I have been dating big girls because I wanted to feel like I could, let my family and friends know that that is what I like, in case I should.."

"Want to date a Real Fat Girl?"

"In case I should meet you again..in case I was ever lucky enough to find you...and then I could love you fully...if you were fat or not...chubby, plump or ***ing huge! I knew I hurt you, and if I could find you, I never wanted to hurt you again!"

"Jack listen. I loved you once, and talking to you like this shows me why...but I really went through some shit. I was in one weird relationship Jack...it started out as a job, and then it got crazy...I gained alot of weight..."

"Well you are the best cook I know, so of course when your cooking, you have to taste, so it goes.."

"I tasted more than food Jack, and the problem is I liked it. I was up to almost Three Hundred Pounds, and loved every bit of it, but couldn't stay with those people. It would have been utterly wrong for everyone involved, and I had to leave. Over the past months, I have been trying to get my old body back, not because I want it, but in case I met you dammit, and now you tell me you don't care if I am Huge!! Am I dreaming or are you trying to kill me, because if your lying, I will....I don't know...Kill myself! I love you Jack, and I don't want to lose you, but I love fat now too, FAT Jack....I want to get really fat!"

I don't know if you can imagine how I felt at that moment. Here I was, with the love of my life, gone forever apparently until a few days ago, sitting in front of me telling me she wanted to get huge. I had really just adapted to admitting to myself that I was an FA...and now....I had a raging woody...embarassing but for the fact that it was concealed beneath the table cloth, but my dockers had tented out like never before. The blood rushed to my head, my ears were pounding, my heart was racing, and Linda asked...

"Did you hear anything I just said Jack" in a frustrated and hurt voice.

"Oh Linda, I heard it all, and it's like a dream for me! I don't care how big you want to be, 300, 350 pounds....whatever..."

As I said those numbers I saw a sly smile fill Linda's face, a sly smile I realized later inspired by how pitifully low those numbers were in her mind. She reached across the table and took my hand in hers, which I noticed was smooth as always, with beautifully manicured nails.

"Jack, I can't wait to get you to my appartment...I need to show you something you are really going to like, something you have already shown me you really liked before, but now Jack...now...."

I was ready to explode as you can probably imagine, and my wood was absolutely throbbing as I stared across at her beautiful almond shaped face, with not a trace of a double chin, and fierce blue eyes blazing...I stared like a dumbstruck schoolboy...practically drooling...

"Can you get me some more Nan from the buffet over there, make it a plate of Nan, with some Shahi Mugli Paneer Curry...a plate of that too please lover....I am starving!"

I stood up like a jack-in-the-box at my loves command...and there it was for all to see...pitching a tent in a khaki colored pair of dockers...

"Oh Jack, we'll get to that later! Sit down and cool off and we'll have the waiter get it, it's only that he will skimp on the portion and I'm a growing girl!"