chapter 3

Year 15:

Dearest Husband,

Amazing. Simply amazing is the thought that runs through my head when I think about these past 15 years. Yes, there have been good times and some bad times, however, one thing that hasn't changed is our love for each other. In so many ways, you are the perfect man and you are everything I've ever wanted. In fact, I feel like our relationship is stronger than ever. That's why I feel comfortable in telling you this: I've been looking back and wondering what might have been.

This may sound strange, but remember Justin Hartley? The guy I went out with a few times in college before I met you? Well, it just so happens that I ran into him at the store for the first time in years. It really wasn't much of a conversation - just a quick catching up, mostly. He's married now, you know. They're both in marketing and seem to be doing pretty well for themselves at least financially.

Anyway, you should have seen the surprised look on his face when he saw me. I mean, sure, I'm no longer the 120 pound lightweight he knew in college, but you would have thought I had grown an extra head based on his reaction. His wife wasn't much better. When she asked me what I did and I told her that I was a full-time homemaker, I swore I heard her scoff before she said, "Oh, well that's nice". They both ran off in a hurry shortly afterwards, saying they had an important meeting to attend.

The whole experience made me reflect on what I could have been like if I hadn't met you instead. Maybe I'd be a busybody like Justin's wife, trying to climb the corporate ladder and killing myself everyday to do so. Maybe I'd be a little more physically active, like one of those gym bunnies, trying to keep up with appearances and impress people. Hell, maybe I'd even be 20 pounds lighter!

I think back to how wonderful you are and how wonderfully you've treated me over the years and I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm so happy living out my own version of paradise, being a pampered housewife, a kept woman. I really want for nothing, well, other than food. I really can't seem to get enough of that - haha! So, it's no wonder that the life I've chosen has made me more than a little out of shape.

But I'm comfortable, oh so comfortable with everything. At this point in my life, I'm starting to be less and less bothered by reactions from people like Justin and his wife. I'm in my early 40's now. I don't have time for petty dramas and superficial squabbles over things like my appearance. As long as the things I care about most - our marriage, family, and friends - are doing well, then so am I. With you by my side, each day it seems I'm growing more content, more comfortable, and more, well let's say...shapely. And I couldn't be happier.

You are my soul mate. I will love you, always.

Happy Anniversary!