Chapter 2 - the hunger game

Looking back, my change in behavior came about around the time I met Stuart. He had just been hired at my university as an adjunct professor. I was always a solitary person, keeping to myself when I was at work, but he went out of his way to get close to me. Always asking for advice, sitting next to me in the faculty lounge when I was eating lunch, dropping by my office all the time. Frankly, I found him annoying, but we began a bit of a professional relationship due to his sheer perseverance. His area of expertise was subliminal messaging and suggestion, something I had very little interest in. To me, it was a shallow field used to profit off the easily influenced and feeble minded. But I humored him as he droned on about it. And I have to admit, it was kind of nice having someone to talk to for a change.

One day I caught him poking around my office after returning from a lecture. I didn't think much of it, but it was after that when I first started noticing changes. I started getting hungry more often. At first, I'd just munch on the rice cakes I kept in my desk drawer, but that soon became insufficient. It was when I ate a whole bag of them and still felt unsatisfied that I knew I needed to start filling up on something more substantial. Healthy snacks weren't enough, as I started craving things I never had before. Over the next couple months, I became quite familiar with the local delivery places. I would regularly sneak doughnuts out of the conference room. My body craved fat and sugar and I gave it what it wanted. There was something in my head screaming that I needed to.

These new feelings of overwhelming gluttony were strongest when I was working in my office. Something about that place just made me want to eat. Instead of doing research or grading papers, I had to fill up on greasy takeout and the sweets that now occupied the place in my desk that once held tasteless rice cakes just to focus on anything. It had become a serious distraction.

I still did my best to remain professional, even as my work clothes began to shrink around me. I had never in my life had anything on my body even resembling fat before, so I quickly began to notice the changes in my figure. Not to mention the other side effects that came with such unhealthy eating habits. As I started to develop a gut, my original solution had just been to stop buttoning my blazers or wear looser shirts, but that plan only lasted so long. My burgeoning belly was far from my only problem. My size zero clothes fit perfectly on my boyish waif of a body, but we're ill-equipped to handle even the slightest growth in curvature.

As I grew more womanly, I had to buy bigger clothes. Size 2, then size 4, size 6 and so on. I was convinced that I could stop myself from putting on more weight, but my efforts were met with minimal success. Not only had my bad habits intensified, but I was also terrible at exercising. I don't think it could be said that I was ever in great shape. Sure, I was skinny; but I was weak, uncoordinated, and generally unathletic. I was a nerd. I had no need to be sporty. So my attempts were met with instant exhaustion and increased hunger.

Though my near-primal drive to eat was mainly restricted to my office, the fact that I stuffed myself in there daily had clearly increased the volume of my stomach, so I started eating more and more at home too. My kitchen had always been pretty pathetic, but now it was filled to the brim with a variety of treats and ingredients. Since I wasn't nearly as ravenous at home, I actually started taking time to prepare meals for myself. To my surprise, I actually really enjoyed it. I started simple, but continued to challenge myself until I was making high quality meals; some of which were quite large. I was making family sized dinners for a party of one every night and leaving very little for leftovers the next day. Passing out on the couch with my hand on my ballooning belly after my third or fourth serving became a common occurrence.