chapter 4

The doctor said his bloods were fine. That was a relief! He asked about his sleeping habits. Was he not sleeping at night and therefore feeling tired during the day? Did he snore or suffer from sleep apnoea? Was he drinking too much alcohol?
Paul replied 'no' to all the questions.
The doctor scratched his head, struggling to find an answer. He decided to give him a whole barrage of tests and review in a month when the test results were back.

Paul could not be bothered to do much any more. He simply had no energy to do anything. He started to turn down invitations to go out with his mates, he made up all kinds of excuses, but the reality was, all he wanted to do was sit at home, put his feet up and dose off. Once his eyes were closed, sexy Susannah might come to him. Why could she not be like that in real life?

He still had to endure going on 'works dos' where he was expected to get along with and entertain prospective clients. He'd pushed himself to go out once or twice, but he yawned throughout dinner. He could not whip up any enthusiasm for the products he was trying to sell. He was not interested in the clients or the companies they represented, nor was he interested in their families, what school they'd gone to and what activities they did outside of work.
He was so tired he simply forgot things - perhaps because he'd been so tired he'd never processed the information in the first place. His tiredness made him crotchety and bad tempered if he was forced to do anything he didn't want to do.
All he wanted to be was sleep. He stopped playing golf, he stopped socialising, he stopped going to the gym.

As Paul retreated even more into himself, Susannah took charge. She fobbed off his medical concerns, made sure he 'forgot' about appointments, cancelling all outstanding investigations. She knew exactly why he was so tired all the time. She did not want the whole world to know she was behind it all.
If anyone asked about him, she simply replied that he was having 'tests'.

She told his boss that the doctor thought he was overworked and too stressed. That was why he was so tired all the time. He didn't want to go off sick though, so she arranged a three day week for him.

Paul knew nothing about the changes, he did not know what day it was anyway, he was losing touch with reality. Some days he did not know what was up or down. More than once, Susannah had had to help him because he'd put his clothes on inside out.
When he went into work, as soon as he sat at his desk, he could feel his eyes getting heavy. They would almost close by themselves. He was barely aware of it happening. Then his head would start to nod. He'd wake himself up a few times with a jerk of his head. Sometimes he'd go to the gents and splash his face with cold water, but it made no difference. As soon as he got to his desk his eyes would start to close again. Then, eventually his forehead would hit the desk and he'd go to sleep like that. On other occasions he fell asleep still sitting upright in his chair.

Paul was not just changing psychologically. His physical characteristics were changing too.
It was Susannah's colleagues in the office that noticed the changes more than anyone else.
The first changes that they noticed was his clothes. They just did not look as pristine as they had once been. He would wear a pair of trousers that had not been ironed. He would wear the same shirt two days running. He would come into work unshaven, or with scuffed shoes.
Then they noticed something else about him... that was apart from his constant tiredness and Susannah's endless excuses for him. It was quite subtle at first, his features were less defined than they had once been. He was losing his toned physique and thickening around the middle somewhat.
By the time he was only coming in three days a week, his weight gain was evident for everyone to see. He had developed a small paunch. His trousers were getting rather right around his buttocks.
Every time he came in, he seemed to be even fatter! Ruby had seen him snoozing at his desk surrounded by wrappers of one kind or another. He was not aware of her presence, but she had been appalled at him sitting there stuffed with food, his trouser flies had been down to allow more expansion and his shirt buttons were straining to remain fastened.

Of course, the weight gain was all down to Susannah's manipulation!
Every morning, he was woken up by an alarm, set by Susannah at six. She was always there to see his eyes open, dressed ready for her morning exercise. He was barely awake, she would force him to drink a highly concentrated flavoured shake. It contained his first sedating antihistamine of the day as well as appetite stimulants and ingredients that would make sure that all the extra calories he consumed in a day would end up as fat.

She would let him go back to sleep again while she joined her personal trainer.
By the time she woke Paul a second time, she had finished her exercise, had a shower, got dressed, prepared breakfast and a packed lunch and caught up with all her relevant work emails.
It took such a long time for Paul to do anything these days. He lacked any vim or purpose and did everything in a half hearted manner. Susannah berated him regularly. This only served to undermine his self esteem that had already been given a beating by the subliminal tapes.

If Susannah was going to work, she simply left Paul to his own devices at home, knowing that he would sleep most of the day. She left him plenty of fresh fruit, vegetables and lean proteins for him to make a healthy meal for himself. She knew he would not have the patience to do so, so she also left plenty of convenience foods and snacks. Things that required little or no preparation and were full of fat, sugar and salt.
There were savoury pies, pasties, a selection of cooked meats, and cheeses leftover takeaways, cakes, crisps, dips, sweets, boxes of chocolates, chocolate bars and fizzy pop.
She always knew what he had been eating not only because of what was missing, but because of the empty wrappers that surrounded him. It never occurred to him to tidy up after himself because:
1. He was too tired and could not be bothered to do it.
2. He was living in a dream anyway. By the time he woke up, the wrappers would all be gone and everything would be neat and tidy again.

If it was a weekend, or if it was a day he ventured into work, Susannah ensured he always had some kind of fattening food within his reach and plenty of it.
She still played him the old tapes to degrade him even further, but she also played him new ones to make him completely psychologically dependent on her.

She completely changed his whole way of thinking. He never ventured outside the confines of the house or the office without her because some evil might befall him and he would not know what to do.
He never used the phone because, the calls would not be for him. He had no friends so he had no one to call. Even if he did talk to someone on the phone, what would he talk about? No one was interested him or his life anyway.
Whenever his eyes opened, his belly expected to be fed. If he did not do this, some evil would occur and he would not know what to do.
Whenever he ate, he had to eat until he could not possibly eat any more, or fell asleep, whichever was the soonest. If he didn't, something terrible would happen and he would not know what to do.
Then finally...
He was not allowed to think about how fat he was and how much weight he was putting on. It was none of his business. He simply had to do as he was told. If he was told all he had to do was eat, well, then that was exactly what he would do, without question.

He was praised for his laziness, his greed and his gluttony. They were the subjects to dwell on. Could he think of how he could improve those skills?