Quality without compromise®

chapter 1 part 3

* *
“Glad you’re here today” Shira broke another several minute span of chocolate-eating-enforced silence.

“Even with all my rants?”

“That’s not my favorite part. But it’s nice having someone to talk to.”

“Why don’t they let us use our tech? That rule *does* make it seem like prison!”

“They do let you—me—us—everyone use them for emergency calls and texts.”

“Yeah, but not for anything else.” Eden had to stop for the better part of a minute to enjoy (and she truly did enjoy) a Dark Scotchmallow®. {Fuck, if they keep giving me these pieces of confection heaven I’m gonna get as fat as Shira, or—oh gosh no—some of those super lard ladies around the main office} she thought as she chewed. “What’s the difference to them if we’re chatting like this or staring at our screens?” She popped a Dark Vanilla Buttercream into her mouth, getting the hang of chewing and speaking at the same time, “If we’re not talking ’cause we’re in our own worlds on our respective screens, seems to me that’s more mouth time for processing their cast-offs.”

“I don’t claim to have everything about this place figured out, Eden. Nice name, though I keep wanting to call you Edie.”

“You may call me Edie” she blushed bright red, “as long as we’re friends.”

“We’re friends” Shira smiled back, “as long as we’re not ranting. I promise not to bring up the finer points of my sex life—unless you ask. And I’ll try not to trigger you on the parade thing.”

“You have a nice name too. ‘Shira’ slides off the tongue readily, with or without chocolate.”

Each of them received some mixed Milk and Dark Chocolate Stars, these confections immediately taking starring roles in each of their mouths.


* *
Feeling a little better about this whole weird situation and in particular her new co-worker, Eden decided it was time to pick up one of several loose conversational threads. “I’m clear on the whole Munger–See’s–Pasadena thing. I still don’t get how what you did when you worked for the catering company at The Huntington gets you in here filling up on chocolates with me. Something about Munger, but then we went off the rails.”

“Ever thought about how Munger rhymes with hunger?”

“No. Is that the connection?”

“No. Just occurred to me and I thought it was interesting. There’s a Munger on the board of The Huntington—not Charlie, but a close relation. Sad Trombone was *really* torqued with the whole, um–”

“–I know.”

“Yeah, that thing. She seemed to want me in prison, but with my offense only rising to the level of firing and possibly being shun- and reputation-banned from food service, there didn’t seen to be an option which satisfied her. Once she learned my true calling is as an exotic dancer, she got with the Munger on the board who got with someone here who got me into this, to ‘destroy’ my figure via fattening me with chocolates, so my exotic dancing career would collapse.”

“Why are you air quoting ‘destroy’” she didn‘t air quote, but your author single-quoted in this long sentence to set off in the story text for easier reading comprehension.

“Formerly an exotic dancer, now a *belly* dancer!” she grinned, tossing her soft, significantly tubby belly fat around with both hands.

A rush of weird feelings seeing Shira’s soft, creamy, surprisingly pale fat belly skin suddenly pulled out of her pants and shirt and played with gave Eden significant vertigo.

“Time for some water, girl.”


Sipping water did help. Shira putting her belly away helped more. Eden felt sure she wasn’t romantically/sexually/intimately attracted to Shira, but something about seeing that belly and that playful fun smile and hand play along with it gave her mysterious feelings of a similarly powerful nature.


“Ever considered getting into belly dancing?”

“I’m not fat!” Eden stridently insisted. “And I’m not going to be!”


The smirky look Shira gave her as they both ate the latest rounds of cast-off candies appearing in their respective bowls riled Eden further.


“Size 16 is *not* fat!” she ranted once her mouth was free, muttering at the end, “any more”.

“Alright” she tried not to snicker, still grinning far more than Eden felt at all appropriate. “That’s 16W, right?”

“*Neither of us are exactly in the Junior size range any longer, are we?!*”

“Settle. Juuuust wanting to make sure we’re using the same sizing system.”

“Does it really matter, when they’re all arbitrary unitless numbers which don‘t even correlate between brands within a given system?! What’s got you all wistfully staring off into space now?”

“Guy I dated. Joe Bob was quite the unitless number. Not that I’m a size queen—not much, anyway—but apparently he was absent the day of the boy-to-man upgrades. Great with his tongue, though. ***Really*** great with his tongue!” she rolled her eyes and stuck her own tongue out lustily.


The plinking of several chocolates into each of their bowls once again ended conversation for the moment.


* *
Eden heard the end-of-shift signal out on the main floor. “Day’s over already?!”

“What? You haven’t had enough chocolates yet?”

“*Don’t say the C word!*”

“Which one?”

“The one you just said 2 sentences ago!”

“Oh, so you‘re good with me saying candy? Candy candy candy candy.”

“Stop!”

“We *love* candy! They make *lots* of sweet, sugary, C-word-coated candy here!”

“*Any* C word!”

“♫ *Bom* bommm!

Bom bom.

C-word is the word I use to descri- iiiiibe

All the feeling that I have ♫–”

“–What’s with you and your The Association fixation?!”

“You *do* know that song!”

“*Shut up! I’m not as old as I look!* Wait a minute—*other way ’round, other way!*”

“Yeah we should go out the other way” Shira agreed once she stuck her head out the door and looked both ways. “Big crush at the main door right now. Reminds me of this guy–”

“–No more of your date stuff, please Shira? Maybe tomorrow, but I’m struggling to work out how to have dinner without hurling.”

“Same thing I told you and we did together at lunch: hydrate. Eat veggies and savory, avoiding as many C word ingredients of which we’ve both eaten a lot today as possible. Follow me; I’ll show you the sneaky snake way out to the parking lot.”


Shira looked a lot more like a hippo or cow than a snake from Eden’s vantage point behind her as she led the way. Indeed, Eden barely picked up on much at all of her new work surroundings, eyes fixated as they were. {Whyyyy am I staring at your big rounded bouncy *** buns?! Did not know chocolate was this sort of mind-altering substance.}


As they parted ways heading towards the parking lot and their respective vehicles, somehow being in the outer world made life seem normal to Eden again. {Maybe I will be able to survive this ordeal} she thought as she unlocked her old car’s door.