Chapter 7 - pitching (part 1)

May’s outsize reputation at the pension fund created some unique opportunities for her. Few other people would have been able to bring this kind of crazy idea to senior leaders and even gotten the time of day, but with her strong successes from the advanced manufacturing play, she had the ear of some senior people.

Three weeks after an initial presentation to the investment committee (remotely, of course), she had approval to take a leave from CalPERS and begin the process of assembling a team to form the fund.

Macey, despite her reservations, was intrigued enough in the opportunity and, truth be told, eager to work with her friend more once again that she decided to take the role as COO.

The combination of the detailed plans that May had develoepd and Macey’s organizational skill meant that they’d filed their corporate documents a month after they received permission to get started and brought on their team onboard.

May was allowed to poach a few of her analysts from the fund on a two-year secondment, and then did some other hiring to bring in outside expertise, both professional and lived.

The most important hire that they needed was a good chief of staff. Macey was well equipped to handle operations at a strategic level, but she’d need a right-hand to help her carry that out the variety of both the hum drum tasks, like organizing internal meetings, and the strategic ones, like arranging meetings with partners.

A quiet resume search through contacts at NAAFL and other, friendly organizations landed them a range of great resumes, but there was one clear winner.

Her name was Nasha Ikande. She was a second generation Nigerian-American and that alone had meaningful relevance to the work they were going to do. Nigeria was already known as a fat country in the early 20th Century, but had rapidly grown not only to build a significant amount of wealth, successfully pivoting off oil and gas into more sustainable modes of prosperity, but vastly increased overall societal plenty -- and the waistlines of practically every citizen along the way.

Her parents’ arrival in America had only accelerated a predisposition towards fatness after that.

Very tall like her parents at 6”2, Nasha was very fat . It was impossible to guess how much she weighed over the Zoom interview, but when they met her a few weeks at a cafe after hiring her, both May and Macey were taken aback at the sheer size of her. A rippling double-belly, not dissimilar in size to her boss’, dominated the front of her form, a wide strip of almost obsidian-dark skin peaking through the already-stretched buttons of a surprisingly tasteful (and immensely large) linen body-suit. Unlike her boss, however, Nasha was fat in a way that was more traditionally feminine, with a strangely hourglass figure, despite her size. She had massive breasts each easily the size of her head that always puffed slightly above whatever thin barrier a collar tried to form for her, and a proportionally massive ass that she generally needed two chairs to support. She had ripplingly jiggling thighs that moved penduously with each slow, shuffling waddle she made -- an effort she seemed to try to keep to a minimum.

Beyond her size, she also had a beautiful face, with alluring dark brown eyes, a beautiful gap-toothed smile, and lustrous nappy hair that reached outward from her head in all directions.

Her resume was impressive -- Purdue graduate with honours in business, a stint at Bain Capital, and some personal work on democratizing investment with inner city communities. However, it was her politics that really made her shine. Nasha was on the board of NAAFL and well connected in D.C. with both Democratic and Republican fat activists in both parties. She was even friends with Jaunita Munez, widely believed to be the fattest member of Congress in history and a champion of fat rights across the nation.

She brought both the political savvy and “doer” ethos that was critical to their effort.

As a sign of respect, May even started going on camera with her when they discussed their work together.

While they weren’t in a position to staff up massively in their initial run, beyond Nasha, May and Macey knew they’d need a range of other roles. Luckily, from her original team at CalPERS, May was able to bring some strong analysts without having to go to market.

May had always prided herself on running an all women investment analysis team, and the vision of Lipid as a women-led fund somehow felt right, or at least was another plus when speaking to investors, so, while not explicit, a female ethos permeated the fund and implicitly defined their other candidates:

There was Amanda Liao, a longtime quant like May, cut in many ways from the same cloth: she was often perceived as a little ditzy on first meeting with her warm, bubbly demeanor, but savagely effective with numbers when given a concrete task.

She’d worked with May for the past few years and had been one of the first to raise her hand when the ask had gone out to join the Lipid team. And Amanda, despite sometimes jokingly referring to herself as a “coconut” for her absorption of US culture, she still hadn’t assimilated enough into American life over her two decades in California to fully buy into the wild consumption and get meaningfully fat. She was easily the smallest member of the team, standing at a meagre five foot nothing, and likely a hundred pounds soaking wet. It was sometimes joked that Amanda would be their “token thin” and that they’d have to keep her away from clients - despite her ditzy persona, Amanda was insightful enough to make sure she partook of the snacks regularly and learned the fat liberation lexicon quickly enough. She was a go-getter, and that seemed to apply to the Lipid culture, too.

Next was Bex MacLaren-Maldonado, the only non-binary member of May’s old team and more in the mold of a traditional quant:

Painfully shy and quiet, they were happy to squirl themselves away (with a steady supply of snacks, of course) to do their work and avoid human interaction as much as possible. Like Macey, they were a bit of a weeb but never in a loud way. Also somewhat like Macey, and cruelly at odds with their gender presentation, Bex had a wildly traditional feminine figure. Of a similar height to Macey, they had a spectacularly hourglass figure -- however rarely seen it actually was -- with breasts that bulged out of every conceivable outfit and restriction they could throw at it. Binders and sports bras were no match for their titanic, I-cup bazongas and anyone who had the unique privilege to look in their closet could see the graveyard of their past efforts to hide their figure.

While Bex likely had the money to consider some kind of reduction, even losing such a spectacular pair of breasts could not have change how easy it was to read them as female: in addition to immense, shapely breasts, Bex’s waist, even with a sizable belly, tapered in with Rubenesque precision. It created the perfect contrast between their shapely top and their irresponsibly curvy bottom. Bex was a booty-heavy beauty, with buttcheeks that sashayed with even the smallest move of their ample hips. Hidden away for the most part in the comfort of their home, Bex’s highly desired figure rarely had to interact with anyone who might misgender them and that, even in a women-run fund, was their preference.

Finally, the last part of their time to join initially was their communications manager. While she hadn’t been on either May or Macey’s team, Azin Mirza was a communications professional par excellence and came highly recommended from CalPERS public engagement team. Every part the smooth-talking comms manager archetype, Azin was also whip smart and knew how to defuse a tense situation, digital or in-person, within moments.

Part of her ability to lower conflict levels was the fact that she looked like she could finish just about any fight: as tall as May, but built in almost the opposite form. A dedicated bodybuilder (rarer and rarer these days), Azin had rippling musculature that intimidated anyone until her warm, upbeat voice defrayed any concerns. Bulging biceps extended out from shoulders and traps that practically pulsed with unused strength. They in turn were supported by a sculpted back and thick, powerful legs that could squat as much (or more) than some of the team members weighed.

And to some of the team members, particularly Nasha and Macey, it was immediately apparent why Azin had raised her hand so quickly to join Lipid: she was an unabashed pervert for fattness. It only took one in-person meeting where Azin stared longingly at Nasha until it got uncomfortable for Macey to clock this and then had a discrete conversation with her new coworker afterwards. Keep it chill, and it wil all be fine.

And so with a somewhat ragtag team, Lipid was ready to start the hard work: finding investors.

CalPERS had indeed agreed to serve as a silent foundational partner. It was decided that at least for now that the pension would initially stay quiet about its investment, both to protect the success of the fund, and mitigate some reputational concerns. The American political and social climate at home was still too muddy with regards to how it felt about being a country increasingly defined (though not yet led) by its obese majority. A savvy investor, however, would see the leadership of former pension employees as a likely sign of implicit endorsement of the fund’s mission, a significant advantage in building out the fund’s stakeholders.

Within the initial Lipid master plan, there was already a draft list of potential investors. These ranged from high net-worth individuals, to other, larger funds like CalPERS who wanted to get a slice of the action. Naturally, all of these funds had some sort of relationship to obesity.

Top of her list of potential investors was the Indigenous-run fund, S7ílhen (which apparently translated from the Squamish language to “Food”), from Canada. Developed by a series of First Nations groups across British Columbia, the fund was focused on impact investments that would generate strong returns, but also bring tangible benefits to First Nations groups that were increasingly significant economic players within Canada.

With some of the highest obesity rates in the country, comparable to Black people in the US, there was a razor-clear alignment -- all that was needed was the right approach.

May had done her homework and knew that a personal touch on this one was needed.

Shockingly, the ever-fatter investor was prepared to leave her home to win over this client. With some measurement assistance from Macey, she was able to custom-order some both some maternity-inspired clothes to deal with her incredible belly and otherwise clean herself up for public presentation for the first time in well-over two years.

A few weeks after initial Zoom conversations and establishment of some interest, May was sitting in a thankfully armless office chair in a beautiful Vancouver boardroom that looked out over the mountains and ocean.

The room was filled with ten or so staff from the fund, headed by an imposing matriarch who introduced herself as Ta7talíya (“Ta - Guh/ - Taalee - Yah”) and led the fund’s investment team. Unsurprisingly, she was a large woman, with subdued tan skin, sharp dark eyebrows, and a striking, bright smile when she laughed - which was often.

The middle-aged Indigenous woman was the fattest person at the table, other than Nasha, sitting in the same large chair without arm-rests. Despite a simple black frock-dress, Ta7talíya’s belly bulged out and formed a number of creases as she sat. Her impressive bust formed a thick shelf of fat that rose dangerously close to her moon-shaped face when sitting. She had incredibly silky black hair that cascaded all the way down her back and shimmered lightly when it caught the light in the right way. She had stood only to shake each of the Lipid team members hands, and quickly settled back into her creaking chair, her saddle-bags notably hanging off either side of the chair as May had shuffled her way over to the open seat next to her.

The initial round of pleasantries was lubricated with a spectacular spread of local delicacies, including a fascinating “West Coast Cob Salad” which was generously layered with candided salmon and other local seafood. May felt like she had no choice but to go back for seconds, and, between exchanges with her hosts, continued to nibble at a nearby plate until it was completely empty. Several of the representatives around the table smiled approvingly as she did so.

As the conversation died down, May, Macey, and Nasha, settled into presentation mode.

May opened with a joke about asking if she could stay “comfortable” during the presentation and run things from her seat. Gesturing to her belly which, despite running parallel to it still bulged noticeably against the broad cedar table. Everyone chuckled and let her begin.

She opened with slides that positioned the human story of the rise in obesity. She referenced the racial inequalities for Black, Indigenous, and Latin people across the continent, long reviled for having larger waistlines than their white neighbours. The time was now, she emphasized, to start to rebalance that system.

The faces around the table were mostly impassive, but here and there she could see the beginnings of a thoughtful smile here and there.

The case she laid out was clear: the fund was going to not only invest in obesity-assisting technologies, services, and procedures, but, in the longer-term, it was going to focus on deploying them in the communities that needed them most. Buildings would be retrofitted to be more comfortable for the growing population; new infrastructure would be built to ease mobility; and health care systems would partner with the companies in the fund’s “family” to deploy new equipment.

With their own First Nations healthcare system crystalizing across Canada, both reserves and urban Indigenous health facilities would benefit from the deployment of the technologies, while the S7ílhen fund would receive a healthy profit.

The proposed arranagement both generous and transparent; no rug-pulls and the intention to function not just as a venture capital fund forever, but to expand gradually into a significant “family” of funds working on everything from R&D to infrastructure management.

Throughout the presentation May repeatedly had to pause and catch her breath, her own weight continuing to limit her productivity and basic movement through the world. Even with the air conditioning in the room, as she passed the mid-point of her deck, sweat was beginning to bead down her forehead, her upper lip beginning to glisten and, unseen to everyone else, the buffet of rolls across her back began to turn into a steamy waterfall. Trying to avoid shifting too much, even a mild gesticulation of her hands caused her belly to jiggle and, as she neared the end, more and more of the flabbiest edges of the behemoth edged towards the middle of the table. By the very end, a good six inches of her most pliant fat -- the heavier, viscous core still a tight ball beneath -- was resting on the heavy cedar table.

When she finished, all eyes on the room turned to Ta7talíya. The woman had continued to snack throughout the presentation and, seemingly like May herself, each bite reflected deeper and deeper engagement, rather than lethargy.

The temperature in the room continued to rise -- as if the collective weight of all present, likely well above two thousand pounds, was itself generating heat. May wiped a little of the sweat from her upper lift and thanking Nasha silently for her recommendation of a sport-related makeup that didn’t run when moist.

Finally, after a breathless few seconds, wherein Ta7talíya finished chewing a final morsel, she spoke:

“I haven’t seen a presentation that was that clear and honest in a long time.”

She closed her lips suddenly and her already puffy cheeks expanded a little more.

Come on…. Come on… May thought hopefully.

A palpable tension hung in the air, May’s upper lip again starting to glisten with sweat and the back of the chair now began to stick against her totally soaked-through dress.

“Based on all of this, I think we have a lot more to talk about,” she said, her big smile opening up across her round face.

Other smiles cascaded around the room and Ta7talíya gave another hearty belly laugh, her enormous bust shaking so much that what was supposed to be a modest neckline became lower and lower and a deep tranche of cleavage opened up for the whole room to see.

Macey, effectively there for emotional support, involuntarily raised her eyebrows at the sight - the sheer breadth of the woman impressive on its own, but it was clear that she and May had a rapport. This boded well for the investment opportunity, which was great on its own, but she also paused to reflect on how her once somewhat ditzy savant of a roommate was now, quite literally, at the board room table making deals.

The presentation opened up another two days of deeper review, the staff from both funds openly sharing details and working through preferred approaches and specific targets. The mood remained buoyant throughout, no doubt assisted by the endless quantities of local delicacies.

The final day of work ended with an invitation -- uniquely provided, it seemed -- for the Lipid team to come to the crown jewel of the Squamish Nation’s impressive real estate empire, the Iy̓ál̓mexw development. It was a sprawling master-planned neighbourhood of glitzy towers and parks that was one-hundred percent Indigenous owned, and one of the reasons they and their allied Nations were able to build such a large investment fund. Seven generations investing was their fundamental principle and something that, with their population’s continuingly increasing obesity, made Lipid such an attractive play.

The whole Lipid team, feasted and socialized with their hosts over the entire weekend, May and Ta7talíya frequently seeming to compete for who could stuff themselves more at the nearly endless series of meals, snacks, tea-times, and other food-related interludes.

May left with the stiches on yet another custom-ordered dress stretching beyond repair and promising to come back and visit later that year to update them on her work to close the other needed investment partners.

The next few months were a flurry of much of the same, with the team slowly reaching out to potential investors for the fund, vetting their interest, and lining up meetings and presentations.

(Con't)