Chapter 6

--The following is a filler chapter I made for fun, I didn't really want to cut it out. It doesn't progress the main story but it still has some fat shenanigans, feel free to skip most of this one save for the first and last paragraphs –

Heather announced, "Okay, we're all here! Jane and Amelia, you'll be the Maids. And I'll be the Master."
I raised an eyebrow. "So, we're playing as anime maids, and you're our master, like, in the game universe?"
“Yes.” They both answered
“Ok then, let’s get this over with" I said, letting out a deep breath
“So, since this is the first time you’re playing a Role Playing Game, you’ll use a pre-generated character. Do you wish to see them and choose or do just get one at random?” She asked me as she laid out five sheets across the table
“I’ll take a random one” I said and proceeded to pick “the fourth one”
“Good choice! You’re going to be ‘Rose Butterworth’, a chubby blonde maid with a secret! You made a deal with the devil to get wealthy, but despite this, you work as a maid out of love for Master Sir Edward Harrington and out of love for the pastries he gives you”
Of course I get that kind of maid…

“I have already created my maid, I’ll be Raven Darkholme, a gothic, kinda paranoid, done with it all maid, I trust no one except for Master, I have a great loyalty towards him and I’ll protect him as he once protected me” Amelia explained
“Well then, let us begin! Sir Edward Harrington, your master, and employer, you are my loyal maids, and while you usually do housework you do help me with some… ‘peculiar’ tasks from time to time. While the maids don’t usually eat with the nobles, guests, and with Master, today is different, he’s asked you to join him for a private lunch for a special assignment.” Heather narrated:
“As you two walked towards the mansion's private dining hall, you couldn't help but notice the elaborate decorations that adorned the walls. Expensive paintings, ancient vases, and luxurious rugs that I probably couldn't afford in my lifetime, well, at least Raven couldn’t.
You entered the dining hall, inside Sir Edward was sitting at the end of the long wooden table, he waved to us and began to speak:
"Ah, my dear maids, welcome!" Sir Edward greeted us with a warm smile. "Please, take a seat."

You two sat down side to side on the opposite side of the table, facing Sir Edward, Butterworth’s chair creaked slightly as she placed her full weight on it.”
I couldn’t help myself and began to flush, luckily, both of them were too concentrated on their notes and character sheets to notice my red cheeks
“Sir Edward began to speak “Feel free to eat some hearty lunch as I explain your assignment, you’ll need the energy”
On the table in front of you, there was a full feast set up, there was pork, chicken, fish, cake, biscuits, fruit…”
I was getting a bit distracted as Heather continued to list food items but then Amelia snapped her fingers and grabbed my attention
“Aren’t you going to eat anything? You’re the only one who hasn’t grabbed anything…” Amelia said
I could see her subtly and smugly grinning, did she connect the dots between the food I brought and Heather’s growing figure?
“Uhh…” I stammered
“Is something wrong with the food?” Amelia asked
I looked into the bowl of conjured food, I didn’t want to gain weight but if I refused to eat then Amelia’s suspicions will grow, I had no choice but to bite the bullet and grab something from the bowl. I picked up a small bar of chocolate, unwrapped it, and brought it to my mouth, I didn’t want to admit it but it tasted delicious but I’m sure it wasn’t going to do any good to my figure…

“No, I meant like, in the game. Master grabbed some pork and I served myself some stew” Amelia clarified
Oh, of course…
“I, Rose, will grab a slice of cake” I said
“Rose leans forward, delicately slices a generous piece of cake, and sets it on her plate, she brings a piece of the cake to her mouth, savoring the soft texture and rich flavor as it melts” Heather narrated as she grabbed some candy from the bowl for herself
Amelia then began to narrate talk: “As we were eating our respective meals, I turned my gaze to Rose, my eyes seemed to twinkle with amusement, "So Rose," I said with a mischievous grin on her face, "I see you're enjoying those pastries."
“Huh, yeah, I guess I am” I replied, not sure where she was getting to “Is something wrong with them?”
"Nothing, nothing," she said, still grinning. "I just thought you were supposed to be watching your figure, what with being a maid and all."
I know she was referring to my character in the game but I couldn't help feeling a little self-conscious about my figure. Heather then began to speak up:
“Ahem, "Evelyn, please don't tease Rose like that, she's doing an excellent job as a maid, and her appearance has nothing to do with that." Master said firmly.”
Amelia began to narrate:
“Evelyn seemed taken aback for a moment, but then she nodded. "Sorry, Master," she said, looking down at her plate”

Heather began to narrate as Sir Edward: "Now, as you know, I have a small favor to ask of you. I have a bit of a problem in my forest, and I need you two to take care of it."
"What kind of problem?" Amelia asked
"A slime problem," Heather replied "It's a big one and it’s been getting out of hand lately, and Sir Edward fears it might start to attack his mansion or the nearby villages. He needs you to investigate and get rid of it at all cost"
"How dangerous is this slime?" I asked, feeling a bit concerned
"They can be quite dangerous, I'm afraid," Sir Edward replied. "That's why I need you two to be careful. But don't worry, I'm sure you can do it" Heather then proceeded to narrate out of character “Well then, feeling a bit nervous you make your goodbyes and departed from the mansion. You headed towards the forest, walking through a dirt trail, surrounding you are apple trees”
“Do they bear any fruit at this time of the year?” I asked
“Getting hungry already?” Amelia asked in a mocking manner “Regardless, they should be good for healing, let's try to stock up for when we encounter the slime”
“Oh, good thinking” I replied
"The forest is lush with fruit, big red apples, but these aren't just any apples. They hold mystical energy within them and are incredibly versatile. However, getting to them requires a bit of extra height," Heather explained.
“Sure, sounds easy enough, Evelyn, how about I lift you up?” I asked Amelia
“No way, I’m wearing a dress and I refuse to let you get a peek” Amelia complained “I’ll lift you up instead”
“Ok then, normally this would be an easy task but seeing as Jane’s character is a bit on the… thicker side, you’ll need to roll athletics with a target value of 10. Should be easy”
“Oh right, well, here goes nothing” Amelia rolled the dice, counting the numbers, "Five, two, plus two from my athletics attribute... Oh damn, nine. One shy."
Heather grinned and began to narrate "You managed to lift her off the ground, but eventually, your balance began to falter under the strain. Roll for luck, with a target value of 8."
Amelia rolled the dice once again, muttering under her breath, "Come on, give me some luck... One and three. Damn, just four."
"You lost your grip, and Rose falls forward, landing on top of you. Thankfully, Rose doesn't take any stress as the impact was absorbed by Evelyn, who takes two points of stress in return," Heather narrated.
"Sorry about that. I told you that I should have been the one to lift the other," I apologized.
"Whatever. Can I get up?" Amelia asked.
"Well, Rose is resting her full weight upon you..." Heather trailed off.

After getting back up, I lifted Amelia up, grabbed some apples, and went on our way, soon after we encountered another obstacle, a small gap in the trees that we needed to find a way through. Heather described the gap to the players, "You see a narrow passage between the trees, it seems like it's the only way forward"
“I’ll try to squeeze through” said Amelia
“Roll for Athletics, with a target value is 10” Heather said
Amelia rolled, read the numbers, and did the math.
“12. Success!” Amelia said triumphantly
“You manage to squeeze through without issue, Jane, what do you intend to do?” Heather asked
“I'll try to squeeze through too” I replied
“Are you sure about that?” Heather asked again
“Yeah” I simply replied
"It's going to be a tight squeeze…” Heather stated
I sighed, knowing what was coming next. "How difficult is it?" I asked.
“So it will require an Athletics check. The target value is 12, due to your larger size" Heather replied.
I rolled my dice, but the result was not what I had hoped for. "I got a 7," I said dejectedly.
Heather began to narrate “Seeing Evelyn squeeze through relatively easily you decide to give it a try yourself, at first, it goes well, it’s not only until you’re halfway through that your progress slows down to a crawl. You’re stuck.”
“Urgh, how was I supposed to make it through!? This situation seemed like it was rigged against me…” I complained
“Well, if you looked around you would have found a stick of dynamite…”
“Oh” I let out
Evelyn frowned. "We don't have time for this. Can I leave her behind?"
"But what about me?" I asked.
Amelia hesitated, but then she sighed. "Fine. I'll help you through. But this is the last time, okay?"
“Evelyn tries to pull Rose towards her, Evelyn isn’t particularly strong and Rose is certainly the bigger kind of woman, so it takes a great effort trying to pull her through the narrow gap, she then stopped pulling, took a deep breath, braced herself and pulled with all her strength, pulling and pulling, it seems hopeless at first but eventually succeeds as she jumps back and Rose comes out with a popping sound, some sticks coming out with her as well”
“Nice job! Let’s continue” I said
“One last thing, make a luck roll with a target value of 8” Heather interrupted
“Uhm, sure, let’s roll” I said as I grabbed the dice “3… So what does that mean for me?”
Heather began to explain “Your clothes seem to have caught up on a branch on your way out, they’re slightly ripped, revealing some of your soft flesh inside”
Give me a break…

We continued onward to the final stretch of the adventure, we had to face the great slime. As we arrived we could see a patch of land devoid of greenery, it seems like the great slime had left a path of destruction as it consumed its way through the land. We eventually came face to face with it. Heather described it as a large blue slime with what appeared to be a nervous system inside its center, it was trying to reach and consume a hive of bees that was above it, just out of reach.
“Let's kill it! I’ll begin by giving it a taste of my throwing knives” Amelia stated
“I’ll use my… broom to attack it” I said
We rolled, Amelia did decent damage but my broom wasn’t very effective, the encounter went back and forth like this for a while, that is until the table started to turn against us
“I’m out of knives and my stress is piling up! It doesn’t help that I took your full weight earlier at the apple tree…” Amelia said while glaring at me “Oh wait, the apples! let’s use them”
“They are filled with magic and very versatile in what they can do, think well before using one” Heather interjected
I passed Amelia some of the apples I was carrying, she crushed one and unleashed its magical energy toward the slime, dealing a huge blast of damage
“Good job!” I said “My stress is piling up, I’ll eat one of the apples and continue to distract the great slime while Evelyn deals damage”
“You begin to eat one of the magical apples in your possession, it tastes great! Its magical energy helps to heal your wounds and soothe your mind, I wouldn’t ask about the calories though…” Heather narrated
With our new strategy, we swiftly took the upper hand, the great slime was down to its last legs (if it had them anyways) but the mood soured as we ran out of apples and to make matters worse, a misguided blast made the hive above to drop, unleashing a swarm of angry bees.
“Amelia, what does Evelyn look like?” Heather asked
“Well, Evelyn had black hair and was wearing her usual gothic outfit, with black lipstick and eyeliner to match her dress” Amelia explained
“And what color do bees REALLY not like?” Heather asked
Amelia simply said “Oh crap” and began to order her character to run
“Well then, it’s up to Rose, the great slime at this point is divided into many smaller pieces, it’s very nearly dead you just need to deal the final blow before it tries to put itself back together!”
“Uhmm” I stammered, I didn’t have any weapons on me, I wasn’t an athletic character, and even the broom that I did have broke a few rounds back
“Think of something quickly before it reforms!” Amelia said urgently
“Can I eat it?” I let out
“What?” Heather asked
“The slime, can I eat the blob containing the brain?”
“...Sure, give it a try. Roll a difficulty 12 skill check”
I closed my eyes and rolled the dice, when I worked up the courage to open them I saw a four and a six, added with my skill attribute of three… 13… I succeeded!
“Out of options, you dive into the slime’s central blob, the one that contains its brain. Rose begins shoveling chunks into her mouth, the slime attempts to escape or fight back but it finds itself unable to do either as chunks of its brain are swiftly being taken out of its body” Heather narrated

After some more rounds the slime was finally defeated and we headed back to the mansion, when we arrived we met with Master and began to report our mission, heather began to narrate:
“Ah I see you’re back how did– Oh Lord, what happened to you two!?” Master Sir Edward said in a surprised manner
“Evelyn squeezed her dress, leaking water onto the floor “Well I got chased by a swarm of bees and had to jump into a river to lose them off…”
“What about you Rose? Why are you in your underwear? You look a bit bloated too I might add…”
“Well, I accidentally ripped my dress at a tight squeeze and the slime digested what remained when I began to eat it” I explained, Rose still feeling some movement in her stomach from some remaining chunks of slime”
“You ate a… never mind, I don’t want to know the details, what’s important is that you took care of the slimes and did a good job doing so, congratulations! you deserve a little rest now.” Heather narrated

We finished off with an epilogue, Heather said that it was a good session and that she had lots of fun, and so did Amelia who kept her part of the promise and agreed to swap the earrings, we parted ways and headed to our dorms as it was getting quite late, before going I took a glance at the bowl, it was completely empty, I would have smiled but I did take a fair bit of snacks without noticing throughout the game. As for myself? It felt like when you watched fucked up porn, did I have fun? I have to admit I did, but I can’t say that I didn’t feel a bit embarrassed at times… Oh right, I also had to check in on the tome and Lilith.

Author's notes:
I really like TTRPGs IRL so it was a bit of a chapter I wrote for myself, I intended for it to end quickly but I kinda got carried away writing, insert that one George Lucas gif "I may have gone too far in a few places". I hope people like it regardless. I'm thinking of whether or not to do some more RPG sessions in the story, perhaps I could leave it for a spin-off series? Make sure to send your feedback in the comments.
The Maid RPG is a real game, by the way, I hope people catch that reference.