Chapter 12 honest gluttony

That night I dreamt of a giant funnel the size of a building, held up by wooden scaffolding, held directly above me as I sat beneath it, looking into it with my mouth open. When I woke up I said “Okay, maybe those pills ARE messing with my head. Whatever, worth it.” I wasn’t even thinking of my chest anymore when I said that, I just loved the way they made me feel when I ate, and today would be even more food, and even more pills. After the show last night I sent Jones a text explaining what had happened, and asking her for some of that stuff that would help me to eat even more. So I checked my phone to see a text from her. It said

Jones: Go ahead and up your dose, I’ll be there in the morning. Also, I am glad that you are really diving into this headfirst. It’s nice to know that I won’t be alone on the road to enormity.

The idea of “enormity” still made me feel kind of on edge, as I picked up the bottle of pills I thought aloud. “Is this even right? I don’t want the crazy idea of ‘enormity’ that Jones does.” Then I thought something. Maybe she had felt the same way around three pills, after all, she was taking more than twice as many now, wasn’t she? I know my feelings about all of this changed as I took more. Eventually ending up like my dream atop the pyramid is the most likely outcome of all this, why not enjoy the ride? I shook four pills out of the bottle, then a fifth and sixth, then a seventh just because. I stared at the pills in my hand for God knows how long, before I realized something. I was drooling. Literally drooling at the thought of turning myself into a gigantic pile of fat that did nothing but eat and feel good. I put the additional pills back into the bottle, leaving four in my hand. I tossed them into my mouth and threw my head back, swallowing them down. Maybe that WAS my destiny, a thought I felt strangely okay With, but I would not hurry it along.

My doorbell rang and I got up to get it, expecting to see Junior’s face. But no, it was Doctor Jones. The doctor was a sight to see, I’m not even sure if I meant that in a good way or a bad one. Her chest was clearly beyond any sane standard of measurements. I seriously doubt her hands would even reach her nipples at this point if she tried. They were sagging down to about her belly button, in hindsight I’m shocked it wasn’t much further at this point. She looked like a drawing from a fetishist brought to life. Was this where I was headed? And why wasn’t that thought alarming?
Jones had two prescription bottles in her hand and held them out, saying “One is your next set of Bust-ex, I took the liberty of raising the rate you get them at to six pills a day, I’m up to nine after all,” and she turned sideways, showing off her, truly gigantic breasts even more, She continued “I can hardly go a day without raising my dose anymore it seems, and you know what? I’m fine with that, in fact, the thought turns me on to be frank. So why not six pills for you? Hell, I think I’ll up my dose to ten tomorrow. I think my chest will be too big to move about freely soon enough anyway, I might as well enjoy it to the fullest.” I noticed she was blushing as she held her arms out to caress her chest, saying “I mean, the money from my fans seems to come in faster every day, and I am adoring this whole thing. I don’t imagine I’ll be able to walk for much longer, a few days max at this rate, I’ve already arranged to hire some assistants from among my fans, a half dozen guys who will come to my home and tend to my every need as I continue to grow. Which reminds me,” Jones held out the bottles again and I stepped outside and took the pills from her outstretched hand as she continued “This is likely the last time I’ll be going anywhere in person. So I, ahem,” She made air quotes with her fingers, “’arranged’, for someone in Pharmatech to continue mailing pills to both of our addresses, for both the Bust-Ex and the Expands, oh, that’s the name of the other pill, it’s spelled E-X-P-A-N-Z, because someone in marketing sure loves them some Z's let me tell you.” Jones was speaking quickly and very energetically, I asked her “Why the air quotes?” and Jones laughed before explaining “Bribed, you know, you’re no fun with that,” and laughed before saying. “Now, I know you’ll be busy doing your own thing, but don’t forget to visit lil” and she looked down at her chest, “Uummm, big ol’ me while you still can. Or hell, a phone call every now and then would be nice even. Now, if you’ll excuse me.” And she began to slowly walk away, saying, "I have a nice, big meal to get to,” she pat her giant chest, “these puppies need fuel to grow, and grow, and grow, and. . . She didn’t even try to have a proper goodbye, she just walked off, ranting about her chest growing. “I think I may have met Dr. Jones in the final moments of her sanity.” I said to myself under my breath. Regardless, I checked the instructions on the new pills she had given me. “Okay,” I said out loud “Take one to two pills each morning with food.” Just then I heard the person I had expected earlier.

Junior walked up to me from the opposite direction of where Jones went. He waved at me and said “Hey Debbie!” I waved back, it was a surprisingly busy day on the sidewalk in front of my house. “Are you ready for another full day of fullness?” I laughed and said “Hey, I thought you had class today.” Junior shrugged and said “Eh, holiday. You didn’t look at your calendar did you?” I had not, in hindsight I could’ve guessed from Junior talking about Friday on a Thursday. My stomach rumbled loudly and Junior said “Sounds like breakfast time!” he was clearly extremely excited. I said “You really do like this don’t you?” Junior smiled and said “Yes, a lot.” Then added “I I’m taking a poetry class at the college, it hasn’t even come close to putting how much I love this into words.” I smiled and said “Do you have a crush on me?” Junior blushed a bit and said “Well, I don’t know if crush is the right word.” Then paused for a second before saying “Hey, I said my poetry class couldn’t put it into words, so I sure as hell can’t. I’ll just say this. I want to watch you eat every day I love it, I don’t ever want this to stop. I know it’s not really my call, it’s yours, but know this. You will have my help for as long as you would have me.” That was so weirdly romantic of him, maybe it was just the pills talking, but that kind of devotion is just touching. I wrapped my arms around Junior and gave him a hug, saying “You are a real cinnamon roll, you know that right?” and my stomach growled again, Junior said “Do you want some REAL real cinnamon rolls?” with a smile. I nodded and said “You know, something sweet for breakfast sounds great.” Junior, ever dutiful, said he would get me some sweets for breakfast, then took off.

My stomach continued to growl and I had the strangest thought. I could handle not eating for a minute while Junior left, if I ever want to be enormous like Jones, I need to take more pulls till that changes, I need to be eating every waking hour of the day, every minute even, nearly every second. I shook my head, why was I even having these thoughts anyway? Was this something the pills did? Most importantly, why did this excite me, rather than scare me?
I went in while I waited, and read the Extenz bottle again. It said that, it would have a 15 minute delay after I take the pill(s) to start working, and when it did it would do three things, it would increase hunger, expedite my rate of digestion, and increase the elasticity of my stomach. It then went into a little mission statement type description of why it was made. Apparently the pill had been created to allow people with cancer, and other disorders that destroy your ability and will to eat, to function normally. There was a warning on the bottle, “May cause weight gain.” Which made me laugh. I don’t think that’ll be a problem. I couldn’t stop gaining weight now if I tried, and I really wouldn’t care to try. This wasn’t about cup size anymore. Gaining weight had become part of my life, it gets me paid, it feels good physically, it makes me happy, aaaaanndd, it is caused by something highly addictive. That last one doesn’t exactly sound great, but it belongs on my list of reasons to keep going if I’m being entirely honest.

As I waited my stomach continued to growl and hurt me, surprisingly badly, maybe taking that extra pill really had made the hunger worse. So I went to my cupboard and found a box of peanut butter granola bars. I grabbed one and took a bite, then had a thought. Those Extenz pills said they have a 15 minute delay before they start working. Maybe I could get a head start on the timing and take one now. I grabbed the bottle to shake out a pill, two hit my hand and I could practically hear the thoughts in my head. Take both, you’ve already refused to increase your bust-ex intake by more than the minimum amount. Part of me felt that was true, part of me thought it was absurd, but that part was quiet, and getting quieter by the minute. I took two of the pills and swallowed them before finishing my peanut bar.

I had wildly underestimated just how hungry I would be by the time Junior showed up. It took everything I had just to not tackle him and eat the food he brought as he came up the driveway. I yelled “Hurry, table inside!” as I ran inside. My stomach was rumbling almost constantly at this point and, in hindsight I could have been more polite. But at the time I absolutely could not wait. When Junior put down a big pink box from his dad’s Donut store I just said “Camera’s on already. Hi everyone, I’m eating now.” In a hurried voice as I practically ripped the top off of the little pink box. I didn’t smell the donuts intentionally, but the smell was so strong, it was like I could feel the sugar in my very soul. I just needed to feel it in my stomach. I grabbed the first thing in the box without even realizing what it was until it was on my tongue. It was a cinnamon roll. I moaned “Finally.” In a stifled, difficult to make out voice. I vaguely remembered my prior attempts to be alluring and sexy as I ate, but I honestly didn’t care right now. I didn’t care about anything but the next bite. Junior spoke, saying “I’ll edit this out, but do you want me to do the talking while your mouth is, busy?” I gave him a thumbs up without even looking. I wanted to be a good host, but I couldn’t bring myself to concentrate on anything but eating just yet.

Junior spoke to the camera saying, “Hi, I’m Junior, I’m Debbie’s assistant. She’s too focused on eating to do much else, so I’ll do the talking today.” I absent-mindedly thought that his words were pointless, he should be getting me more food. I didn’t even know how much was here to be honest, but more would be better regardless. I took a huge bite of a maple bar, one with bacon on it, the variation of a hit of savory meat flavor was nice. Then came a chocolate cream filled donut, It was so rich and sweet. Whenever I finished one pastry a flicker of sorrow entered my mind, only to be buried by an overwhelming sense of joy when I took a bite of the next item. Cinnamon rolls, donuts, croissants, and coffee cake, I knew they were different things, and I loved the bits of difference they gave, but in the end what really mattered was this. They were all weight in my stomach, they were satisfaction to a, seemingly Infinite need. I don’t even know how much I had eaten when the fullness allowed me to think normally again, I think it was after two boxes of donuts, but in the end it didn’t matter much to me. I still wanted more, this frenzied feast was the best experience I had ever had. I felt like sugar and dough suffused every inch of my being, and I wanted more inches of being to be filled. I hadn’t bothered wearing a bra or panties after last time, so when I heard cloth tearing a warning bell went off in my mind. I looked down to see my growing gut had torn a small hole on the center of my top. Should I stop? Should I try to stay decent? No, not on your life or mine. I felt a weird rush of exhilaration. Would this give me another rush of pleasure like last time? I had hoped so. I tried to eat faster to rush toward that goal, but I was already eating as fast as I could.

Junior said “Ummm, Debbie?” I knew he meant well, he wanted to make sure I was okay. But I couldn’t make myself stop eating for long enough to talk. It was weird. I felt like, no matter what I ate, I was no fuller than the moment before. I kind of hit the point of fullness where my stomach no longer hurt, then stopped there. I could hear and feel the tear running up and down my torso, to my waist and the center of my cleavage. Junior asked me “Are you okay with exposing yourself like this?’ and I absentmindedly gave him another thumbs up with one hand as I pulled the next box closer with my other. I felt like I could eat a literally infinite amount now, like it would be heaven if the donuts just never stopped coming and I always had more to shove in my mouth and down my throat. I gave a stifled moan through a mouthful of donut, saying “Milk!” Junior didn’t even bother with a cup, and ran to and returned from the fridge with a gallon of milk for me. Perfect timing, I was just getting parched enough that it might slow down my eating. Wait, had I said something? Whatever. I held the jug of milk over my head, opened it, and tipped the open mouth into my own. As I swallowed down milk as quickly as I could some spilled out onto my body, soaking my chest and the scraps of fabric that still remained after the destruction of my top. When the milk was empty I hiccuped and went straight back to eating.
After some time I ate the last donut and looked around frantically, saying “Where’s the next box?” Junior looked at me in awe and said “There is none, you ate them all.” I let out a shriek “NO!” As if I could, by sheer willpower bring more food into existence. Junior said “I literally brought everything I could carry, I. . .” He kept talking, but now that the frenzy of eating had passed it hit me like a wrecking ball. My stomach hurt, no, whatever you’re thinking of, it isn’t enough to describe this. I had never had a child, but I felt like this must be what giving birth felt like. The pain in my stomach was excruciating. It was so much that, when I looked down to see my swollen gut I didn’t even care that it looked reddened even through the milk that had covered it, and I didn’t even notice that I was completely nude at that point. Even the tiny scraps of clothing that had remained when I last checked were gone now. The world began to fade to black as I tumbled forward, onto the table. Junior shouted something I couldn’t quite make out.

The next thing I remember I was waking up in my bed, lying under a thin, white sheet, with Junior looking over me very attentively. It was strange, my stomach still hurt from how much I had eaten, yet, it felt oddly hollow at the same time. The buzzing, tingling feeling of pleasure from the Bust-Ex also flooded every inch of my body, maybe it was from upping the dose, maybe from eating so much, maybe both. Whatever the reason, the feeling was stronger than ever, my entire body was tingling, and my chest was on fire, but it was an enjoyable fire. It is hard to put into words. It’s like, that blindingly strong rush of pleasure that accompanies an orgasm. I spoke quietly and said “Okay, Junior, you can edit out that last bit where I fainted,” and chuckled softly. I knew Junior would be worried about me, but at the same time I felt too good to be somber.
Junior, who had been looking like he might doze off waiting, suddenly snapped to attention and said “Debbie! You’re awake! What happened? Are you okay?” I took a deep breath, this would probably be the time to tell him about the weird drugs I was taking. I swallowed hard, now or never, then said, “Listen, Junior. This is going to be weird so please let me finish before saying anything.” He nodded so I continued “Now, you’ve commented on how I eat more than should be possible. I bet you’ve also noticed my chest has grown like, a cup size, in a little under a week.” He nodded again and I said “I’ve been taking an experimental drug, it makes it so that when I eat a good amount of the calories from the food go to my chest rather than my stomach or hips or whatever. It also makes food give you a bit of a high and motivates you to eat more. “ Junior’s face was strange, he looked horrified and aroused at the same time, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything quite like it. I said “Now, I have been wanting to eat far more than I actually can and, a friend of mine, who is on the same pills, had found another pill, meant for cancer patients. It is supposed to increase your appetite and capacity for food both. My plan was to use it to let me eat more than I could before, so I could grow my chest even faster, and basically get high off of stuffing myself. I had even taken a double dose of it, as well as upping my dose of the other medication. Apparently the part of it that makes you hungrier is MUCH stronger than expected. Or maybe it interacts badly with the other drug I’m taking that makes me want to eat more. I don’t know to be honest. You know what the craziest part is?” Junior shook his head and I said “I’m honestly feeling kind of hungry now, but I know that eating would be a bad idea just now, and It’s a weak enough hunger that I can be rational about it now.” Junior spoke up, “So, that’s why you’ve been doing the show? That’s the reason you eat the way you do?” I nodded and he continued “So, are you going to try to quit now?” I answered “I know that the smart answer would be ‘yes,’ but in all honesty, no, no I don’t even want to try. I think I want to try taking a smaller dose of the new pill and try to find a balance where I can control how much I eat and not hurt myself, while still eating more than is naturally possible.” Junior smiled and said “So, you want to continue down the path of drug fueled gluttony?” I immediately thought back to Jones, she had used the same words, calling it a path. I nodded slowly and said “Yes, I feel like that’s the ‘wrong’ answer, but yes I do, and I want you to come with me if you’d be willing to.” Junior’s smile only grew as he said “You’re lucky I am a giant fucking pervert. Yeah, yeah I’ll still come. If I say no then I'll l live the rest of my life in regret, wondering ‘what if.’” Just then my stomach growled and he said “One thing though. We do this, but we do it smart. I know how many boxes of what pastries I got you. I rang it up and printed the receipt myself. So, I know that this is too much, when you test out a smaller dose to see if you can control yourself, I’ll bring one box of donuts less than I did today. That way, even if you can't control yourself, you at least wont kill yourself from overeating. Like, at least not literally.” I laughed, I kind of wished he had said the same amount as today, that extreme tingling feeling was still in my chest, and I never wanted it to end. But at the same time I realized that what he said was the smart answer. I didn't do any more videos that day, and I ate a surprisingly normal sized lunch and dinner.