Chapter 5 - pain as a catalyst for change

Allen had settled into a routine. Eat. Eat. Eat. Some days were good somedays were bad. Everyonce in a while he would just break down and cry. His parents were really gone. Food had become a drug for him. Whever he was feeling the ills of his loss, food was there for him. His grandmothers great cooking just made things better.

Allen was keenly aware of the fact that he was getting fat. Having been fit his entire life it was a bit of shock to him o realize that he legitimately had a gut. The last time he went to but clothes and he needed size 40 pants was a real shocker. He had been a perfect size 32.

In the midst of all of this he had developed a keen habit for gaming. Spending his days hanging around with his aunt serving him food, sitting on her comphy couch just worked for him. He become a big fan of the role playing game genre during this time. The ability to dive into another world and take on the role of someone besides him was a nice release.

His own world was just too much. He was tired of all of the constant dotting from his family members over his loss. Whenever he went over to his relatives for sunday dinner, his relatives wouldn't stop talking about his family and his loss and all of the stories about growing up with his mother. In a way he just wanted to be someone else. Someone without all of this pain and baggage. He began to dream about being someone else.

It started out as just that, a thought. Then he began to think what if he really did try to become something completely different.

One evening when his aunt and him were bonding over one her amazing italian feasts he observed her and just how similar she was to her mother. She and the same long black hair. The same dark eyes. Even the sense of style. One thing was different though- she was fat. This one distinct feature changed everything about her. She had a different lifestyle, different hobbies, and most notably a different appetite.

It was as if something inside him had awakened. He knew what he needed to do. He was going to get fat.