Lessons in humility

Chapter 2 - tutoring or lectures

"I didn't realize I was doing that...you're pretty good." I said.

"You also don't make eye contact with someone when you're speaking to them. That tells me you're either lying or holding something back that you want to say." She continued.

"I just don't make eye contact with you; I see the way you judge me and it makes me uncomfortable and embarrassed." I said.

"Judge you?" She said.

"The way your eyes move around the room, the not so subtle way you hold back on telling me what you really think about me. To you, this tutoring job is a burden; something you would rather avoid doing." I said.

"Okay, you want to know how I really feel. Here goes; you frat boys think you're all hot shit on campus and that the rest of us should be in awe of your misperceived splendor You waste your time partying, boozing and screwing your way through the semesters and still expect to actually graduate. Then just to keep up appearances and to make the college look like they are actually keeping pace with the academic world, the good students like me who ACTUALLY came to college to learn and prepare for their futures get stuck tutoring the morons like you who've been doing nothing but wasting time and mommy and daddy's money the whole year." Raya said.

"Wow, you really are judging me. You don't even know me." I said.

"I know your kind, that's all I need to know. Now, let's get this over with so I can go home." Raya said.

"You're right, though. I am a moron and I did waste most of the year boozing, partying, and screwing my time away. That's why I want to change that, I want to get back on track and actually have a future outside of some minimum wage slave dish washer in a back roads dump diner. Reality hits like a ten tonne truck, and I'd like to survive being hit." I said.

"Then start paying attention; you need to pass this test." Raya said.

"Yes ma' me." I said.

I did actually begin to understand after the night was over, turns out that once Raya gets into what she's doing she's a really good teacher. I also got the feeling she might have been burned by one of my former frat brothers or at least nearly burned. I did want to know what happened but I figured that would be pushing my luck with her. We were already rocky and on thin ice as is. I needed to pass this test if I wanted to stay in school.

"Thanks, I actually get this now." I said, once the two hours were up.

"Well then prove it by passing." Raya said.

"I will. Good night." I said.

"Night." She said.

I closed the door after her and looked around at the state of my place. I grabbed a garbage bag and a vacuum and started to clean it up. I just hoped there wouldn't be any roaches or mice around here. It took me another three hours to clean up and it was one am by the time I was done. I grabbed a burrito and flopped down on my couch and turned on the TV. I completely zoned out and before I knew it, I'd eaten all six burritos in the box and I was still hungry. My belly bulged out even more and my pants were tighter and despite that I still got up to look for more food. Eventually I went to bed, it was nearly four am but I was finally full and now I was tired. Good thing tomorrow was an academic day with no classes...

I continually ate right up until the day of the test and I was running out of clothes that fit me. I gained weight so fast for some reason. I saw Raya in class and gave her a slight nod, she surprisingly returned it. I sat down as the test was passed out, my big belly was squished up tightly against the desk and I was very uncomfortable. I needed to focus though and prove to Raya that I wasn't a complete loser. Her approval still meant a lot to me for some reason. I hunched down over the paper and got to work.

On the other side of the row, one of Raya's friends leaned over.

"Hey Raya, I think Tubby Fat Boy over there likes you, he keeps glancing your way." Courtney said.

"He does not; I'm just tutoring him because the professor made me. That's all there is to it." Raya replied.

"Uh-huh, might want to tell Tubby that." She said.