Best Fa Story Ever Like for Real

Chapter 1

Once upon a time. There was this guy… and he was super hot muscular and allllll the ladies wanted him! Because he was so hot! The ladies were also hot! And they had pool parties and college dorm parties where they got naked and wrestled in a foam pit.

But anyway.

His name was like Brandon or something idk I can’t think of a better name?
Bradnodon has started a new semester at Sex University. His third class of the day, Kinks and Fetishes started off totally normal, until this girl came in late and sat next to him. He stared at her like omg. She was huge and barely fit in the desk. She leaned over and whispered, “hey can I borrow you’re notes later I was late” and he said “ok;”. He turned away and blushed so hard he was red.

Later in the coffee shop she sat in a chair and almost broke it. Bardano slid in like a baseball player and caught her but she crushed his spine. She got up and someone poured coffee on him so he rehydrated like one of those pills with the little dinosaurs in them. Anyway she was so fat, like the size of a house. A house couldn’t even go as bigger than her than she was!

They drank fcoffee and brando cshared his notes with her. He learned her names was Abigail III. “y are theeere so many abigails in ur family???” he asked, spilling his coffee everywhere as he slurped that shit up like a dog.
“Oh it’s just like a tradition, you know,” she replied. “thanks for catching me earlier,” she said sheepishly, her chubby fingers playing with the pages of Brandiorno’s notebook. “No one’s ever caught me before.”
Bradnon paused his slurping and glurping and stared at her, schoked. “Really?” he suddenly felt something heat up in his chest, like a little fire that could only be put out by water.
~
Over the next week, Brandond couldn’t get Abigaill III out of his mind. He coulen’t escape the memory of her scent, the excruciating pain as she landed right on his fuckin spine, or her cute fingers playing with his notebook. Her voice was like that of a thousand birds singing- loud, and her hair as yellow and dry as hay.
“I simply must have her,” he said out loud as he sat in the quiet, empty dining hall.
“What?” a guy on the other side of the room asked.
~
End ch 1