New perspective

Chapter 1

Inna shuddered, wrapping her shawl around her shivering petite body tightly as she waited outside the doors of her daughter's elementary school for her child to come rushing out. Dozens and dozens of children ran by her, shouting happy words in english that made no sense to her aside from the odd word like yes or goodbye that stood out to her. She swayed her body slightly, trying to force some warmth into her body as she silently prayed her daughter would hurry up and come out, she was freezing and they needed to catch a bus.

Her daughter Olena was always a few minutes late as amazingly her school had set up a monthly breakfast and lunch program for the kids that only cost a mere $10 a month for two meals a day. It was shockingly cheap and was only offered to low income families or immigrant families or in her case refugee families. The program was partially funded by taxes from the local community that had been slipped into prices for other stuff like groceries and gas that went towards different school related things and then the families would only have to pay a small fee in exchange. They weren't high quality meals, little things like day old bagels, cereal, macaroni and cheese, cheap bowls of soup from a can, a bowl of peas and a chicken drumstick but it was food and it gave Inna the chance to provide food for her daughter that wasn't just dollar store garbage or fast food as she'd begun having to order more and more lately as the deals were cheaper then groceries for a full meal and she had to take advantage of every rewards program that was available.

Her stomach growled as she thought about food and she mentally shoved that thought down. Money was tight as a single mother living in a foreign country and she knew she'd get a chance to eat later but it would be hours from now. Tonight she had to get Olena and take her to her swimming lessons at the ymca, the only reason why she could do this was because of the city's free bus pass for refugee families and the ymca also offered a free swimming lesson program to low income families as a way to encourage exercise in children. She knew she wasn't able to afford the healthiest food and she wanted her daughter to remain somewhat active and she seemed to enjoy the outing and getting to be with other kids as it made her feel more normal and gave her a chance to socialize and learn the language. Inna was not picking up on english nearly as fast and on the other topic the only reason she had stayed petite was thanks to all the walking around she did having to bus everywhere.

She didn't even have a job yet and she'd spend most nights practicing english on free apps on her phone, submitting resumes and never getting a response or video calling her ex who was still in Ukraine after he'd refused to go with her to the usa. They'd had differing views and he firmly believed things would get better and he wanted to stay and tough it out despite the ongoing war. She wanted to fight for her country too but Maxim was insane. Despite the fact that Kyiv was one of the most dangerous places to live and he couldn't even fight he held fast and believed things would be back to normal any day and Inna was crazy for wanting to leave and protect herself and her daughter. He was so wrapped up in the trauma of it all that he had refused to accept the reality of their situation and it had driven a wedge between them and broke them apart.

The two had been engaged to marry when they broke it off but having a child out of wedlock had always gained her disapproving stares. She tried to fit in and still attended church here in her new home as she lived near a ukrainian orthodox catholic church mostly to feel a sense of community and because there was always a big lunch for the refugee families after service consisting of childhood favorites of hers like holubsti, halushki, borscht, pierogies and so so much more. Inna could rarely afford to cook traditional food for herself or her daughter and it was one of the rare times she could have such healthy and filling food free of charge these days.

The truth is she didn't know what she believed in nowadays. She'd started to lose her faith many years ago and had gotten a tattoo of a sunflower on her wrist which she always hid in church but had gotten stares because of it in the past, she was casual about drinking and didn't mind the odd cuss word and had slept with the odd man without being married. In her culture she was judged heavily for these things and looked down upon and for years now she'd began pulling away and pursuing her own path away from the way she'd been raised.

This had also led to her split with Maxim. Sure he'd bend some rules like sleeping together but even before the war he'd made little snide comments about her getting a tattoo or berating her for cussing or pursuing more liberal political views. Their split was bound to happen but she'd been trying to keep it together for the sake of their daughter. When she realized she was pregnant with her now six year old child she'd vowed to try and make this last because her own parents had split when she was young and she didn't want that life for her own child.

Yet here they were. She still let Olena call her father whenever she could but Maxim would always make little comments about how much he missed her and would play on his little girl's emotions and inevitably Olena would end up crying to her mama and begging her to go back home. Inna didn't know how to explain to her precious baby that home wasn't safe and Maxim was just being manipulative because he couldn't handle being alone.

She felt like she was going to pass out from the cold when her daughter finally came running out of the school. She was her clone, a tiny little brunette haired blue eyed girl with a big smile and who looked like she didn't have a care in the world. She had a steaming bowl of what looked like lasagna clutched in her hands that she handed to her mama as she greeted her.

Inna put the container in the bag containing her daughter's swimsuit that was swung over her shoulder and ruffled her hair before motioning for her to get going. "Come little one. We're going to be late for our bus." she said quickly in ukrainian as the two began walking. "How was school? Did you have fun?"

"It was ok but I don't understand a lot. None of the other kids speak ukrainian. I get lonely." the little girl answered as she reached for her mama's hand.

The older brunette sighed, she wanted to get her daughter into more extra curricular activities but without a job and money being so tight it was harder then it sounded. Maybe tonight while Olena was swimming she'd look again and see what came up. "I know darling, I know. Your english will get better soon, it just takes time. Have patience my sunshine."

The bus pulled up as they reached the bus stop and the two climbed on, settling into a seat near the back as Inna made sure her daughter kept close to her. They settled in as the bus began moving and her stomach growled as the scent of the cheap lasagna (that had clearly been made from a frozen dinner but she didn't care) hit her nose. She sighed. Her hunger could wait. Her daughter was her main focus right now and her hunger could wait until later on.