chapter 1

I was always thin. An athlete. Well, college, dorm food, a love of alcohol and weed and you can see how my 5'9 frame went from 137 to 154 that first year. And I tried to fool myself. A couple of friends poked me in the belly as I flushed with embarrassment and they commented on how I was definitely enjoying college life. Even still, in my head I was still thin and athletic and proudly wore my bikini, trying to ignore the fact that my belly was beginning to pooch over the top of the bikini bottoms and there was a bit more jiggle when I ran around. Not that I did much running.
Sophomore year, all the food I could want as part of my meal plan at the college buffet. Fried rice, chocolate cake, macaroni and cheese, croissants filled with butter and cheese... I again just ignored the clothes getting tighter, my bum getting bigger... Then one night before a party I was putting on a sweater that had always fit me perfectly. It seemed a bit tight in the arms and chest. As was it clinging a bit to my belly? That couldn't be. I asked my friend Chad if I looked fat, as a matter of reflex as I always had.All my life, always told of course not.
Not this time.
He looked at me and paused and said,"no, not fat. More like pleasantly plump"

Plump? I was skinny. I was not plump. No way. I looked in the mirror and noticed that maybe he was right. My skinny arms now were round and soft, filling out the sleeves of the sweater, my breasts were much larger and even when I sucked it in, my belly still pooched out. A pot belly created by nights of wine and cake, pizza and ice cream.

I decided to weigh myself. I pulled out the scale, and took off all my clothes, to make sure that the weight would be accurate. I had started the year at 159 and it was now November. The numbers flashed. I just stared in shock as 175 appeared. 175 lbs? How did that happen? It had to be Kati's fault. Ever since I met her, we both seemed to be growing at a steady rate.

I had always been in relationships with guys before, before I met Kati. My last boyfriend had lasted a year and had been a key part of my fattening, I realized now. Over the year we were together, I gained almost 20 lbs, and remembered how he always made sure I had fattening treats around. And how he acted like he hated my weight gain, which I think may have been a lie. After the first ten lbs, I was commenting on how my shorts seemed a bit tighter and that I must have washed them in hot. He took one look at me in my panties (which were stretching to the limit to accommodate my expanding waistline) and said, "don't think it's the wash. Maybe it's that you can't control yourself and are just eating whatever you like, you don't even seem to care that you're turning into a chubby girl, soon to be fat." With that he grabbed a handful of my potbelly and said, you have no control". I was so embarrassed but so turned on that I could barely stand still. I'm sorry, I told him. I will try to do better