Smells like my neighbors figured out how to make really good corndogs. I'm jealous!
YES!!! 25 profile views! This is how we do it in Iowa! This is so not a "millenial participation trophy!" Fuck you, KGGO DJ at approximately 1:00 this afternoon!
This quiet reminds me of when I'm BHM hunting at McDonald's. Except they have Christian music (fun) and mothers nagging their children to eat their French fries. (Annoying.)
This isn't how I thought I'd become a celebrity. I always thought I'd be on "Saturday Night Live." But now, I know that the producers of that show, and pretty much everybody at NBC, are left of Lenin. They fire people for being Republicans. Jay Leno, Chris Farley, and Adam Sandler got fired for being Republicans. I wouldn't have a snowball's chance in hell. And even if they gave me a chance, I wouldn't work for NBC for all the money in the world.
I'm glued to the screen wanting 25 profile views like I wanted states to turn red on election night. I'm watching you. You're watching me. It's erotic. I'm naked. Are you?
Let's get my profile views up to 25 at one time! I was the Chairperson of the 2016 Democratic Caucus, and I ended up voting for Trump!
I told this Scottish guy in Chat that I have American C-cup breasts, and he left chat to go look that up online without saying good-bye. What an ass!
Oh, gross, they're coming out with Peeps Oreos. I hate Peeps. BHM peep shows on the other hand...
Mmm...Pizza Hut BHM Lover's Pizza. That barely makes sense, but Pizza Hut should still get cracking on that.
Do any other BHM-lovers fantasize about remaking the Def Leppard "Pour Some Sugar On Me" video with fat guys in speedos washing a sports car and getting covered in suds and spraying each other with the hose? Fact: That song is actually based on a song Def Leppard wrote as a joke called "Pour Your Hot Sweat Man Love On Me." I am not making this up.