Gaining

What excuse do you give?wy

If they’re complaining about wanting to lose weight you can say “Geez, so glad I gave up on diet culture and impossible standards that are set for women!” and laugh it off. You can frame it in a positive light perhaps.

Granted, I’m a dude so society has different standards, but I’m also quite vain so for me it’s helpful to have “reasons” as to why I’ve gaining/am gaining. Especially because I had previously lost 50 lbs a few years ago and kept it off three years before gaining again. Personally, I mention my medication, using weight gain as a way to over come an ed, and the fact that any of us can get COVID and die next week (or lose sense of taste FOREVER!!!!) and thus I’m going to enjoy myself and stop denying myself; if I get fat I get fat! Life is too short to eat salads!
3 years

What excuse do you give?wy

This keeps happening to me at work too. The topic of weight and fitness pops up at lunch and people will go through fads of diets and so on. Sometimes they will comment that their moobs need a bra and so on, and I sometimes feel they are set up to provoke a response to me. The last time this came up, I simply mentioned that I was happy where I was but would like to be fitter (which is true, but only so I can gain more weight longer term!)
I've only ever once had someone directly ask me my weight, and at the time I told him but next time he asks he will be told to mind his own business.
3 years

What excuse do you give?wy

Ghostfruit, I hear you, it's something I've been struggling with more recently as well. Very similar timeframe, although I'm not sure what you weigh. I have several examples, from my boss comment/lamenting how I no longer fit through a grate... Long story. My mom saying we need to diet, to a friend who has unintentionally gained over a 100 pounds last few years, so jealous.

Other people notice but it's those select few who actually bring up my gain, or changes. The best way I've found to deal with all the above is to give half-truths... Implying I am comfortable, content, or otherwise not concerned w/ number on the scale. Brush it off and make 'fat kid' jokes, me and my friend constantly toss insults back and forth, mostly at our own expense. Laughing about our mutual fat girl struggles. Exchange advice on chafing and stuff, including our appetites or bad habits.

I am in no way comfortable admitting fat is a turn on, discussing my sexual desires or that my gains been intentional. I can't and won't try to explain that part with anyone outside this community. We seem to rely on humor alot in those awkward moments, and I've vaguely implied bits of the truth.

I started out small a few years ago, baby steps contributing an offhand comment or add on my two cents. Always letting them bring up the subject of weight first, try to normalize the topic I guess. Act like it doesnt really bother you to be bigger and hopefully the people around you will follow suit.

That's been my experience so far, I also worry about what they might say in another 20 or 40 pounds. There's really no way to shrug off 300 pounds, I'm not just getting chubby anymore... Good luck.
3 years

What excuse do you give?wy

1. You dont have to give an answer unless someone asks you a question.

2. It's no one business.

3. I would tell the person i trust the most and maybe let them get the word out.

4. People who aren't into gaining, like we are, wont understand so if what they think bothers you... well... come up with another reason that they will find acceptable.
3 years

What excuse do you give?wy

Ghostfruit:
specifically looking for other women to respond, but i’ll also take men if their experiences line up with what i’m asking:

i’ve gained weight pretty slowly over almost 6 years. i rapidly got chubby in a year or two, and then the rest just creeped up over time. a lot of the people in my life (friends or coworkers) have known me before and during my weight gain. because of that, i’m pretty sure that my friends have noticed that i’m no longer thin, but before quarantine i’m not sure they realized how big i’ve gotten. now i’ve not only continued to get fatter, but people haven’t seen me in four months and when they do, i notice them looking at my belly (it doesn’t help that all my shirts are too small and constantly riding up). i think they’re realizing i’m bigger than they remember.

the awkward thing is, no one has or will ever mention my weight to me. i’m a girl and i think it’s a girl thing!! friends will talk about their own weight around me, occasionally complaining about how much they’re eating and such. in the past, i wouldn’t really engage bc i was afraid it would call attention to how fat i am.

but now i’m realizing that people are finally seeing how fat i really am for the first time, and i want to kind of “come out” as knowing that i’m fat, so that i can talk about eating and food again and help my friends be more comfortable around me and my body. i think if they hear me acknowledge that i’m fat, it’ll make them more comfortable.

but i don’t know what to tell them! i don’t want to explain to anyone that this is a sexual thing. to me, it’s more than that: it’s how i’ve always wanted to look and feel, but i don’t want to explain that either.

for other girls who also got fat and didn’t know how to explain it to others, what did you end up saying?

(asking for girls bc i think with boys it’s very different! weight gain among men is much more normalized)

tl;dr: what excuse did you tell people for why you got fat?


I have a lady friend who throws it out there first and says things like, "I've decided to work on my figure... with burgers." Another lady friend would slip in comments like, "I'm just getting sexier every day" and put her hands on her hips and sashay a little.
3 years

What excuse do you give?wy

Rikki:
I've never thought anyone needed an "excuse" or to give an explanation. If you want to keep your fetish secret, you probably shouldn't even broach the subject.

People know you're fat. You know you're fat. Why does there need to be discussion? If someone did ask/comment/express concern simple answers include:
I like food
Maybe I have been over doing it
I know I'm fat
It's none of your business
STFU before I eat you


ROTFL I love this
3 years

What excuse do you give?wy

ShakesSphere:
You are all probably too young to use this, but when challenged about her gain my girlfriend just says one word: MENOPAUSE


This may work with coworkers but not friends, say it’s early onset Menopause
3 years