Fantasy Feeder

Past the point of no return

fatrnfatr:

Calorie burning doesn’t increase very much with weight gain if you remain sedentary. You're probably consuming least 7000 calories a week more than you're burning, so you're going to keep gaining. Figure on putting on at least 70 pounds a year, which would bring you to 400+ pounds in 12 months time. Get those 64 inch pants ready!

so i checked my calorie log ( i use fatsecret.com) and um i think you're right... which is both exciting and a little frightening!

totally failed to reduce my calories today already... i drove thru at mcdonald's and just got one egg & sausage mcmuffin sandwich... and then i was so hungry i went to another less than 30 minutes later and ordered 4 more!

4 years

Canuck

First feeding experience

amazingem:
In writing this I stuggled with how specific I should be - I hope I am not too graphic in my descriptions.

beautifully written, babe! maybe a couple of details I would have left out, lol... but otherwise great.

4 years

Canuck

Past the point of no return

WideJuan76:
There is a path that is rarely spoken about and that is that mental transition to accepting that your gluttony has become ravenous. I call it REFRAMING; I had to reframe how I saw myself and what being obese was really like and owning the fact that I now have a new normal.

exactly - the new normal. i have made a few attempts to eat "normal" and get my daily calories below 4,000 and i was just miserable! i was just so hungry all the time.

i stepped on the scale today (this is not an april fool's joke!) for the first time in a month, and it said 330 - the number has never so high before, which wasn't really a surprise, but i kind of expect it to, like, level out, you know?

4 years

Canuck

Past the point of no return

Pummeluff:
That's sooo true. Once you really develop those habits they are there to stay. I can't imagine going back to my old eating habits. Something would missing. And it's pretty hard to get yourself to do sports again once you quit and get used to being lazy.

this is so true, and this is why it feels like there is no return to being skinny, for me... when it gets hard to walk any distance, or up a flight of stairs, it just makes me want to go sit on the couch!

when i started to measure the calories i was consuming, i tried to reign in my appetite for a few days, to get under 4,000 calories a day... omg, it felt like a punishment! i wondered how could anyone live that way??? lol

4 years

Canuck

Past the point of no return

Edxl:

Also: stretching. Both being sedentary and getting bigger can cause your muscles to tend to tighten up, at which point they may not stretch properly and so put more stress on your joints. Do those old gym class stretches as best you can, and figure out new ways to stretch despite your new inches, and it should help (as will just walking regularly)

great tip! em is trying to get me to do yoga with her... i am a little reluctant, but yeah i can really feel the tightness after sitting in front of my computer for hours.

4 years

Canuck

Past the point of no return

MissPorker:
The point of no return is very real. Once you change your lifestyle and accept being a pig, it's hard to find and keep the motivation to go back. Also, once you gain, your body does what it can to maintain the weight. I've gone weeks of eating 2,000 to 3,000 calories per day with practically no activity and I didn't lose any weight. Lastly, I've gotten to the point where my mobility is limited. It's painful dragging myself through a supermarket so I rely on drive thru and delivery. We all have our vices...food and fat just happens to be mine.

what you have written there resonates so much with me. my mobility has just started to decline in the last little while, though i am a fair bit smaller than you are.

your comment about "vice" really caught my attention, and it made me think, am i using food and overeating as a vice? i can see i am leaning into it, in a kind of hedonistic way, to derive pleasure... so yes, probably it has become a vice!

4 years

Canuck

Past the point of no return

Ssbhmjoe:
I agree! At over 400lbs I know I'm past the point of return. Being so big, any moving around is difficult and makes me only more lazy.

this was a big issue i noticed, even after a gain of just 50-70 lbs... it really demotivated me when i tried going back to the gym. not just being lazy, but being unable to perform at exercises like i had before... which just drove me to being more lazy, lol!

4 years

Canuck

Past the point of no return

Edxl:
Canuck, totally that habit of going for a walk and getting a treat is such a mood, and such a way to lock in your weight.

so true! an interesting impact of my walking this week has been an increased appetite. tracking my activity and eating on fatsecret.com is showing that i am still consuming more calories than i am burning, by a long shot, lol!

the exercise might be helping my breathing a little, but i find my hips are getting sore, so i think i need to take some days off between walks.

4 years

Canuck

Transgender resource recommendations

toronto, where we live, has quite an active lgbtq community (our pride parade is one of the largest in the world, i believe, as an example), and we have found a few local groups online (though facebook, which is kind of... ugh...), which also have in-person meet-ups (when there aren't pandemics, lol), which has been great. met some very helpful, kind, and positive people and couples there.

one of the surprises - and i don't know why i expected anything different, tbh - was that even within this tiny sub-community, people get judgemental about one another. it's not different than the feedist community, or any other, i suppose, so i don't know why it bugs me. still, to have one trans person judge another's decisions on how they feel they need to transition, or to have or nothave a particular surgery really surprised me (and tbh, angered me) .

still, must not let the rotten apples ruin it for everyone else, right?

always remember that you can choose to be kind.

4 years

Canuck