I think the first bit was accidental, then she started liking it.

Wow, I'm amazed that I continue to learn new things about this fetish after all this time.

A woman just told me she went from the 130s to her goal weight of 170. She was conflicted about whether to gain more, diet, or maintain. Finally she decided to gain more just so dieting wouldn't be an option! She immediately felt much better about it. Has anyone ever heard of such a thing?

See "Deciding to Get Fat" on my site: askdrfeeder.dyndns.org/dtgf.html

A couple of English feedees were visiting the US some years ago. I helped them arrange a meet-up in San Francisco. Lots of fun!

I've actually been burned on both sites and don't see much difference except:

Feabie has a public feed, so you see whatever people care to post on there, including complaints and accusations. And of course this causes counter-complaints and counter-accusations. You're much more conscious of issues that may have nothing to do with you.

Feabie has near-line chat, which neatly combines chat and messaging...ff has on-line chat plus messaging and it's not very easy to transition from one to another. So communication between individuals is much easier on Feabie. This facilitates good interactions, but also facilitates bad interactions. So Feabie will tend to be better or worse than ff depending on what you're about and who you're interacting with.

Start with #4. If that goes well, #5. If that goes well #6. If that goes well you discuss acceptable modes of encouragement and safe words or whatever. I doubt signed waivers will be needed!

Ideally wait until you're on you're own. If you're constantly worried about parental friction you can't really enjoy gaining, and why do it if you can't enjoy it?

If you do need to talk to family about it, I helped one woman with that: askdrfeeder.dyndns.org/letters.html

I did help a woman who was worried about this: askdrfeeder.dyndns.org/letters.html

I don't see it on this list of paraphilias: labs.la.utexas.edu/mestonlab/

I realize some just decide to get fat and jump in with both feet. They start eating more and love it and don't look back or worry about where they're going. This is a great way to do it.

But some people are on the fence and wondering how much to gain, whether to do an experimental gain, whether to have goals or limits or both.

For those people I've often recommended an experimental gain. But I'm having second thoughts.

I'm starting to think the experimental gain is more for those whose main interest is the erotic or aesthetic aspects of gaining. They need to gain some real weight to truly understand the experience of gaining.

But if you are more focused on gluttony, on the freedom to eat all you want, the experimental gain may not be as useful. Gluttony is best if you aren't worried about your weight at all. Ideally you should have no limit, or at least a distant one.

Does this make any sense?