Me too! I didn't know there were other people doing that. I studied quite some languages and "fat", "chubby" and similar words were usually one of the first words I looked up when I bought a dictionary.

I too seemed to be more obsessed as a kid. As a kid there wasn't that sexual connotation yet and combined with the fact that you are not yet imprinted with the societal prejudices about fat, you don't try to hide your fascination for fat as much as an adult. I talked more freely about fat kids in school and I was also fascinated by scales. I always tried to get my chubby cousin on the scale at my grandparents house. Never succeeded though I wonder if she still remembers that.

Did anyone ever cheat with those old analogue scales? There was a dial on them with which you could ensure that it was indicating 0 when you were not on the scale. I used to set it to +10 kg or so and then go on the scale just to see the higher number.

I have been fascinated by fat for as long as I can remember, certainly as long as primary school, perhaps even kindergarten. First it was the fat kid at school. As a teenager, I didn't know any big girls but I tried some occasional stuffing and clothes padding to see what it looks like to be big. I also did drawings of big bellies. In a world without internet, I searched my parents art encyclopedia for paintings of Rubens and his colleagues. When I got to university and got to learn more women, I really discovered my love for big women.

I think the padding and stuffing was more a kind of alternative for the lack of a real big woman, because I don't consider myself a stuffer or feedee, although the thoughts occasionally cross my mind, especially when I feel lonely.

I fully understand you. I love my gf's body, but would love it even more and sometimes fantasize about her being quite a bit heavier. But I love it even more that she is a very amazing person, and that is more important to me than having the ideal SSBBW body.

I think there are 2 issues at play in your situation: your insecurities about what you like and his insecurities about his body.

About your own insecurities: There is nothing wrong with liking his body but fantaszing it was bigger. What is important is that you maybe not get maximal sexual pleasure, but enough to get you going. If he would let you touch him the way you would like and if you could let your FFA side more out, would that be enough for you? Tell him that you like his belly, that you think it is cute and like to touch it, but do it in a natural and gentle way.

That brings us to his insecurities: Don't bluntly tell him that you fantasize about 400 lbs guys, because if he is not happy with his current body, he might be repulsed by the idea. There is no need to label yourself as an FFA. But do try to convince him slowly, step by step that you like his body, that you don't mind a big belly and some fat rolls on a man and that you think he is very pretty. Hopefully, as time passes by, he will let you appreciate his body more and maybe start to like it. When he is more comfortable, you can tell him that you always liked bigger men.
Will he ever get to the point of liking his body? Impossible to tell. Some people get there easily and other people never do.

I am sure he is an FA, no doubt about that, but I would not be asking someone I for belly shots though. That sounds like he is after something physical. That should of course not stop you from meeting him, but be sure to explore he is in for the long run.

Positive encouragement! Make sure you tell him regularly that he looks very good, that you love it when a man is not too skinny, that you love his belly, that you think it is cute, etc. Maybe at some point he will make the click and let you love all of him.

I think everyone on this website experiences this at some point in their lives. People with other fetishes/preferences can keep them in their bedroom, but we cannot hide that we are big or have a big partner. You just need to get enough confidence to go for it and if you get annoying questions, you can always try to shrug them off. You don't need to tell people why you are gaining weight, you can say something like "I have been enjoying the good life". Or for FAs, you don't need to explain that you like big bellies or so, but say something like you don't like this stereotype of skinny women in the media, you like your woman to be a bit softer.

This is a pity. I might be an exception, but when I see someone has posted something interesting, I actually like to read their profile.

On regular dating sites there are also FAs, but you have to make sure they can find you. Many big women on a regular dating site try to hide their size by not putting a picture, or putting a picture that makes them look normal sized. That way they attract the wrong men, who are not into bigger women and on the other hand, the FAs can't find them. My best advice when you go on a regular dating site is to make it clear that you are a big woman and only interested in men who appreciate that.
That being said, there are also "normal" dating sites for bigger people.

There are FAs who like the size of a big woman. They come in all categories, some like chubby, other prefer BBW, some want an SSBBW and some have a broad variation in size preference.
There are feeders, and they also come in different forms. Some like the act of feeding, and the weight gain is less important for them, for some the weight gain is more important than the feeding itself, some like a relatively small feedee, others prefer to start with a feedee who is already big or very big, some are "hardcore" in their fetish, some are "softer".

The beauty of nature is that for each preference, there are likeminded partners. You have to chose the type(s) of man that you feel most comfortable with, whether it is just an FA, or someone with some feeder tendencies.