The Padder

Chapter 1 - Caught in the act.

It was a quiet afternoon. Nathan was enjoying the peace and quiet after a hard day at work, finally taking a well-deserved rest. He enjoyed the solitude of his apartment; the loneliness was comforting. Lately, his relationship with his girlfriend Olivia had grown quite strained. She was self-conscious about her body and often angry at Nathan for enabling her eating habits. He hated all of her tantrums. Many times, he tried to make her realize that he loved her no matter how she looked because he loved her for who she was, despite finding her extremely attractive no matter her size.

On the matter of enabling her, she was right. When they started dating, she was on the chubby side, but over the course of their relationship, she had grown to be over 300 pounds, and it was all his fault. But he couldn't help it; he loved seeing the happiness on her face when he pampered her. "It is such a shame that nowadays her happiness is soon followed by her self-conscious ramblings," Nathan thought, longing for the time when they were both happy together.

It was a good thing that Olivia had started working opposite shifts from him and often worked a lot of overtime, trying to avoid him. They needed a break from each other to figure things out and hopefully save their relationship. The alone time he now had allowed him to reflect on his enabling behavior: "She's right; it's my fault that she gained weight. Me pampering her wasn't right, despite how happy I was seeing her happy." The silence made his inner monologue hurt even more. The alone time also allowed him to indulge in his secret hobby and the comfort it provided regularly.

A strong hunger overcame Nathan. It was only natural that hunger would set in; since he came home, all he had done was focus on preparing for his secret hobby. He spent around an hour struggling to set everything up, and the arduous effort he put into it was bound to work up an appetite. But first, he had to rest and catch his breath.

It was finally time. With his body feeling rested enough, he could now make his way to the kitchen and fix up some delicious food. Nathan heaved his massive body; it took significant effort, and he had to make very calculated movements, using the alien balance and shifts of his body to his advantage. When Nathan finally got to his feet, the odd balance nearly caused him to stumble and fall, but after countless sessions practicing his hobby, he knew how to regain his footing. A thought crossed his mind: "Are all these struggles I have in my suit accurate? Are these the same struggles Olivia has? I can see her hating everything; she can't just take the suit off like I do at the end of the day."

As he waddled toward the kitchen, he felt all the padding pushing against his body, a sensation that was weirdly comforting to Nathan. Feeling all the pillows and carefully folded blankets pushing and sliding against each other, moving in unison with his body, provided him with pure bliss. Once finally in the kitchen, Nathan clumsily searched for a quick snack. Despite being talented at cooking, he wasn’t in the mood to make something more complex—especially with the loud gurgling of his stomach drowning all his thoughts.

He saw a pack of microwave popcorn on the top shelf of the cupboard and had difficulty reaching it. He placed a stool in front of the cupboard and climbed on top. The padding pushed against his body even harder, feeling like the hug of a big plush toy. With the popcorn in hand, he quickly opened the microwave, popped it in, and set the timer.

The popcorn alone wouldn’t cut it, so it was time to check the fridge. After taking stock of all his options, he finally decided to make a pair of sandwiches. A sweet aroma of popcorn started to fill the kitchen, and soon the familiar beeping of the microwave prompted him to grab a bowl for the popcorn. Bending down to take a bowl pushed the padding close to his body again, providing the familiar comforting sensation once more.

With the bowl of popcorn in one hand and the two sandwiches on a plate in the other, he slowly and meticulously made his way to the living room, enjoying the weight of the suit and the difficulty in performing even the most basic movements. Once in the living room, Nathan realized he had "forgotten" to get coffee. It was just an excuse to keep waddling through the apartment; he was basically addicted to the weight of the suit, the difficulty present in all the movements, and the feeling of the padding moving and shifting around.

Also, in the hallway to the kitchen, there was a full-length mirror, and he never missed catching a glimpse of himself. The person looking back at him had a lovely, womanly look. At the same time, it was a testament to the hours Nathan had dedicated to perfecting all the shapes of his body. The reflection reminded him of Liv—he admired her body and had modeled the suit after her, the main difference being the size. The suit was pushing the limits of Liv's clothes; if he could, Nathan would have padded even bigger than he was now, but he had to tone it down because he would feel really bad if he ruined her clothes.

All the curves of the suit were perfect. The thick, feminine hips swayed with elegance, and the butt was nice and big, accentuating the pear shape. The upper body, despite the well-defined pear shape, was also generously padded, sporting a big round belly and a pair of fat yet modest breasts. His arms weren’t forgotten, padded with a nice taper, ending in thick, fat upper arms. While the shapes were similar to Liv's, the size difference was obvious. If Nathan had to estimate the weight of his reflection, he would probably put it around 400 pounds, a stark difference from Liv's 300 pounds. "If only I could make Liv see the same beauty I see. Things might be very different," he thought with a hint of sadness on his face.

After he grabbed his "forgotten" coffee, he made his way to the couch, and with a loud thud, plopped his giant butt onto the couch. It was time to finally relax. He turned on the TV and started his binge on another animated series, greedily eating his snack. Nathan still had four hours to enjoy his hobby before he had to return to his average, tiny self and start hiding all the evidence of his secret. The thought of going out for a short walk crossed his mind, but he decided against it, despite the pleasant, cold fall weather that would help him cool off from all the heat building up under all that padding.

He didn’t fear going out and being caught—he had done it a number of times already, and people usually didn’t interact with him; some downright avoided him. Being out like that was still a bit unsettling, but it provided him with a rush of excitement. Today, though, he would rather immerse himself in the fantasy and relax in front of the TV.

Nathan heard his phone buzz. When he wanted to grab it, he saw that it was on the other side of the room, charging. "It's probably just Keith, and he wants me to join him in a gaming session," he thought.

An hour later, Nathan was deeply invested in the show he was watching, fully immersed in his fantasy. All his worries seemed to have melted away. Even after all these years of padding, Nathan still didn’t know why being suited up calmed him so much. Since he was a child, padding his clothes always provided a pleasant, cozy sensation that made him forget about all his problems.

He was suddenly jolted back to his senses when the entrance door clicked. Instantly, his state of pure bliss was replaced by pure horror. “Oh my God! Olivia is home early!” His face contorted into a worried expression. “What do I do? She can’t see me like this. I have to lock myself in the bedroom and take everything off.” He tried to stand up and dash to the bedroom before Olivia came in, but he couldn’t move a single muscle. His body was basically limp from the relaxed state he was in—or maybe he had frozen in shock.

“Nathan, I’m home!” Olivia announced as she entered the apartment. “I don’t feel so good. I have a terrible headache, and I can't work anymore.” Olivia was confused by Nathan’s lack of response. She knew he was home; she saw the light coming from the living room into the hallway. Had he fallen asleep watching TV?

As Olivia entered the living room, she was taken aback by the sight in front of her. The sight of Nathan’s padding was shocking. The more she took in the scene in front of her, the worse it got. Nathan was not only padded, but his body vaguely looked like hers. On top of that, he was wearing her clothes stretched over the inflated form. Not only that, but the room was a mess. Taking everything in made her headache worsen, and along with that, anger and shame were building up. “WHAT THE HELL, NATHAN!” The blood-curdling scream sent Nathan into a state of terror. He suddenly felt like a trapped animal, shame slowly drowning out every other emotion. He mustered all the strength he had, but all he could do was meekly say, “It’s not what you’re thinking, Liv.”

Filled with anger and disgust, Olivia cut him off. “Not what I think? So you’re not having fun at my expense?” Her words struck Nathan like daggers. “You’re just wearing my clothes, padded up with pillows like any other sane person would do,” she said, her sarcasm obvious.
“I can explain!” Nathan replied, still as meekly as before.

“Explain what? That you totally weren’t pretending to be me, or at least the version of me in your mind?” Olivia cut him off again. Her angry expression slowly changed, replaced by shame and sadness at the thought that this is how Nathan saw her, tears welling up in her eyes. “I never thought you, of all people, would see me like this. Is that why you’ve been so cold towards me? Do you see me as a fat, worthless, lazy slob?” By now, Olivia was crying rivers.

Realizing how badly he had messed up, Nathan composed himself to try to calm her. “Liv, that’s not true. You know I consider you beautiful.”

Once again, Olivia interrupted him. “Yeah, sure!” Overwhelmed by sadness and shame, she went into the bedroom and locked the door.

Nathan took a moment to analyze his surroundings. It was just as she said: he looked like a lazy, fat slob. He was covered in crumbs, with occasional stains on his clothes. The room didn’t look any better—pieces of popcorn littered the couch and the floor, and dirty dishes were scattered on the table. Nathan looked like he had spent all day glued to the couch. The shame he felt worsened as he remembered his reflection. No wonder Olivia had been so overwhelmed. He looked like a twisted, dark vision of a future she dreaded to even think about.

Nathan finally stood up from the couch, leaving behind an impression of his butt. He made his way to the bedroom, struggling to find the words to convince Olivia to give him a chance to explain everything. “Liv, please! I beg you, let me explain everything.”
There was no sign of a response from behind the door.
“This isn’t about you or your body. I know it might seem like that, but it’s not. This is an activity that made me feel better, more relaxed. I’ve been doing it for years, even before I met you.”
“Just shut up,” Olivia said, crying behind the door.

The silence was killing Nathan. It felt like hours had passed. He was standing frozen in front of the bedroom door; the suit felt heavier than ever, squeezing the life out of him. Despite this, he diligently waited for Olivia to come out. Nathan was clearly punishing himself—the suit that had provided him with countless hours of happiness had turned into a punishment device.

The lock finally clicked. Olivia came out, carrying a travel trolley. “Please, Liv, just listen to me and let me explain everything,” Nathan begged, the desperation clear in his voice.
“No. I can’t, not when you look like that,” Olivia said, the pain evident in her voice. “I’ll just book a hotel room until I find a new apartment. This weekend, I’ll come for the rest of my stuff. I hope you’ll clean the clothes you’re wearing and put them in a moving box.” The sadness in her voice made Nathan feel miserable. “And don’t you dare touch any of my other clothes. I’ll pack those myself this weekend,” she added, her gaze feeling like daggers directed at Nathan.
Olivia made her way toward the front door. Nathan tried to go after her, desperately trying to stop her from leaving, but he stumbled and, with a loud thud, fell down.
“Bye, Nathan,” she said, her voice full of sadness.

With the door closing behind her, the apartment was once again silent. Nathan, sprawled on the floor, was overcome by sadness and shame, tears finally escaping his eyes.
After crying for what felt like an eternity, he stood up from the floor. The difficulty that had once provided joy was now just what it was supposed to be—plain, annoying difficulty.
He grabbed his phone and finally saw the message from Liv: “Babe, I’m not feeling well, and I can barely work. I think I’ll come home early. See you soon.” The message felt like a punch in the gut, knowing he could have avoided all of this.

He knew he couldn’t just leave things as they were. He had to explain himself. Nathan let his emotions speak as he wrote a message to Liv:
“Liv, I’m so sorry that I hurt you. This wasn’t a way to mock you behind your back. Since I was a child, I would often do what you saw me do today. I mostly did it when I felt bad about my life or when I was very sad. It provided me with lots of comfort and made me feel safe and happy. Even now, after all these years, I still don’t know why it helps me feel good. I always thought it was just a harmless thing I could do in private to feel better, but today I saw it’s far from harmless, and I am ashamed that I had to hurt you, of all people, to find that out. I am truly sorry that I made you feel miserable, especially when you weren’t feeling well. I don’t have words to tell you how sorry I am. I know I probably don’t deserve it, but could you give me a chance to explain everything? If not today or tomorrow, maybe when you come for your stuff. Also, I beg you not to tell anyone about what happened. I know after what I did I deserve to feel humiliated just as you did, but please let me explain everything before that.”

Now, all Nathan could do was wait anxiously and hope that he would get the chance to fix his mess.