Chapter 1

Hi my name is Sniffy and i like big fat women and big fatwomen are da best ever and i really like big fat funny women because i smell funny and i look funny and they smell funny after they ride pigs across interstate 10 and whats her name is fat and her friend is fat and I love it because i;m not fat but i like fat women but i said that already well dats ok because i like saying i like fat women then i go on youtube and post a vid saying i like fat women then do a video response where i talk about myself saying i like fat women over the video saying i like fat women and that was great but anyway this one fat women i strutted on up to her wearing a red double knit suit with a navy blue under shirt and a black and yellow polka dotted tie with plaid pants and sandals and I asked her how much she weighed and she just walked away and I was like how rude is that all i did was get up in her grill and ask her a question but anyway another girl told me i looked like clint howard on crack and i said you smell like a sandbag and she laughed well i showed her didnt i anyway like i said earlier i like fat women and next time ill wear a pinstriped suit direct from acme and maybe i can have an anvil fall on my foot if i dont ask this girl out that i sent a private message to saying i want to feed her and tie her to my bed i better get a response because she was hot and she should respond to guys who send messages like that anyway this one time i asked a girl out and she said no so i told her i didn't like her anyway i sure showed her didn't i well anyway all girls should gain and gain and get fatter and fatter and if they dont want to then i dont want them because im a man and i should decide what women want right anyway i forgot to mention i like big women and dat they are the best and i dont get why they dont like me i havent sat outside someones house in years not to mention i dont tail this one fatty on the bus anymore because some big dude clamining to be her husband literally threw me off the bus when he caught me staring at her and drooling what a meanie because he damned near ruined my blue leisure suit that i bought in 1993 which was probably the year this other fatty was born that i told was fat and hot and sexy and she just walked away anyway its late and i have to go sing the barnaby jones theme song in the mirror while in my briefs so i hope everyone has a nice night