Chapter 2

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry, Chelsea,” she said, reaching for her friend’s hand. “I didn’t mean -”

“It’s okay,” Chelsea interrupted, even though she was clearly embarrassed by the comments. Then she surprised herself by adding “I haven’t really dealt with it yet.” She never talked about her weight gain with anyone. Guess she was just that comfortable talking with her good friend.

“It’s okay, Sweetie,” said Gabby reassuringly. “I went through the same thing after the baby. I had all this extra weight to lose and kept putting it off until one day I said to Marc, ‘I don’t know how I’m gonna lose all this weight.’ And he held me and said I still looked hot and that he didn’t care if I was big. And I realized that I really didn’t care either, and that I was only so worried about losing the weight because that’s what you’re supposed to do.”

Chelsea was hanging on Gabby’s every word. This whole idea about being okay with your weight was such a foreign concept to her.

“So I basically said ‘to hell with it’ and now I just eat what I want and whatever the scale says, so be it,” Gabby continued. “It’s very freeing to be able to look into the mirror and be honestly fine with seeing a little extra here and there.” Gabby’s grin told Chelsea that every word of this was true, and that her friend was happy. She was transfixed with what Gabby was saying.

“So how big are you now?” asked Chelsea, too lost in the story to realize how rude a question it was. By the time it dawned on her, Gabby was already happily answering.

“Well, I was 191 pounds last I checked, which was like a week ago. What about you? Or are you not okay with me asking, because that’s fine.”

Chelsea didn’t want to answer that question, but she also didn’t want to look all depressed about her weight when her friend was so clearly fine with it. Didn’t matter, though, as she truthfully didn’t have an answer.

“I don’t know,” she laughed. “I’ve been terrified of the scale.”

Gabby laughed as well, and was seemingly going to stop pressing the issue, but Chelsea found herself giving away more information. She finally had an outlet to talk about the weight issue with someone who might be able to help her, and she was going to take advantage.

“Last I checked I was like 165 pounds, but that was months ago.”

Gabby could tell that her friend needed help getting through this. “Well, if you’re up to it I think you should weigh yourself. You know, so you can at least see where you’re at.”

“You think so? God, I’m terrified to see what numbers come up.”

“That’s okay,” Gabby said. “It’s scary, I know. But really, you realize you’re not skinny anymore, right? And that you weigh more than that 165 pounds?”

“Yeah,” replied Chelsea. It felt strange to say that. She had been telling herself she was still a thin girl, just trapped in a bigger girl’s body until she could lose the weight.

“Okay, good,” Gabby continued. “Now honestly, what do you think is the worst possible number that could realistically come up on the scale? Realistically?”

“I don’t know,” Chelsea said in an unsure tone. “200?”

Gabby laughed at that. “Girl, I’m not even 200 pounds and I’m definitely a few pounds ahead of you. Let’s say the biggest you could possibly be is, like, 185 pounds. So we know you’re probably somewhere between 165 and 185, right?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Okay, well then if you know that then what’s the harm in double-checking on the scale? Then that’s one less thing to stress about. And then, you know, you can take it from there.”

I guess you’re right,” Chelsea admitted, and she meant it. If she knew her weight, then that question would no longer be hanging over her head all the time.

“Tell you what,” started Gabby, “let’s go to the mall right now and get you a scale. I don’t want to be pushy but I care about you so much and I just hate to see you down about something as silly as a few extra pounds.”

Chelsea looked into her friend’s eyes and knew Gabby was sincere. She seemed so at ease with herself, and Chelsea wanted to feel that relief, too.

“Okay,” she said. “Let’s do it.”