Chapter 2 - not guilty by reason of the insanity of this law

"Keep yourself in pretty good shape, do you?" I nodded, nervously. "Do you know what we do in the Internal Health Revenue Service?" I shook my head nervously. "We prevent individuals from getting more than their fair share of some things, and help others to get their fair share of other things. I know that sounds very vague, but that is more or less our mandate. The fact is, being so thin, you have helped to contribute to an unhealthy societal ideal of beauty being stick thin. On many occasions, you have deliberately expressed beliefs that those who outweigh you are somehow not as good as you are. From the fraudulent information you submitted, we can see that you are trying to hide yourself from us and prevent corrective action. This hasn't helped your case, which has actually been ongoing for several years. Now, before I go on, it is your right to ask to have an attorney present. If you can't afford one, we'll provide one for you. You are being charged with 96 counts of Public Health Disturbance, and felony counts of defrauding the public of self-confidence, elitism, which may be treated as a hate crime, and resisting health audit. The next time we see one another will likely be in front of a judge. I hope you rest well." The three all immediately turned and left, without another word. I just began to cry.
"The judge will be here in the morning. We'll call your lawyer or appoint you one by then." the fat man at the desk called, trying to cheer me up.
I hadn't slept at all when morning came. They brought me breakfast, but I had no appetite. Then they told me I had to go before the judge at first, alone. The judge listed my charges, and asked me, "How would you like to plea?"
"Not guilty, your honor." my voice shook.
"If you plead guilty and avoid a lengthy and expensive trial, your sentence will be much less harsh than if you are found guilty later. Please, I'll ask you one more time to consider this. You are taking a very significant risk with your future if in fact you may be guilty of any of these charges."