Chapter 1 - plastic chair & ripped jeans

this summer, i was chilling outside with my family. we were sitting by the fire on these really crappy plastic chairs. i believe i was nearly 300 pounds at that time. i was wearing shorts who were way too small for me and a cropped camisole who was also too small. my stomach and cleavage were therefore inevitably exposed. my hips and thighs were leaking out the sides of the chair. all of that considered, the chair was remarkably sturdy.

however, when it was time for me to go inside, i got up and the chair came with me. i was stuck in the chair. my mom started laughing as i waddled slightly with the chair stuck to my ass. i was extremely embarrassed, my cheeks were turning bright red. at first i tried pushing it off but it didn’t work. my sister, who was also laughing, tried pulling it off as well but failed. i had to bend the sides of the chair to be freed. my family laughed at me because of this for the rest of the night. i eventually stormed to my room, offended.

ripped jeans:

this one happened when i was a tad smaller; around 240lbs. i went out to shop with my friend and we stopped at an h&m. i saw some jeans i really liked and took a pair that seemed to be my size. but as always, i had to try them on before buying them. i went to the fitting room and tried the pants on. they seemed to be a little tight but i was still sure i’d fit in them. they fit barely over my thighs but when i tried squeezing them above my hips, the jeans made a loud ripping sound and i froze. i stood there for a solid minute not knowing what do do. i eventually took the pants off and changed back into my clothes. i got out of the cabin and went to talk to the lady at the front. i explained to her that the pants ripped as the people who were waiting in line listened and stared. the lady stared at me with wide eyes, obviously not being sure of what to do. i had never felt so embarrassed and guilty. she had to go ask her manager who told her i had to pay for the pants. i did and left. i just wanted to crawl in bed and stay there forever.