Explicit* a diary account

chapter 1

Dear Diary,


I lasted a whole 10 minutes in the sea addicts anonymous meeting..

The whole time I was flipping back and forth to see if my new friend online was on.


As I sat here in the dorm hallway, in and out other ladies walked by... luckily I was far enough away no one could see me..


As I sat in the chair, my pussy was literally throbbing..

It's been fired up all day thinking of my conversations with yet another FF stranger coaxing me into more weight gain.

I thought about pigging out all day, about the discomfort in my bra and hips, the fullness in my seat and my bodies recent 30 lb gain..


Frick.

I'm supposed to meet with my work out buddy this weekend... she is going to flip when she sees what a fatty I have become.


There is a part of me that lloooves the humiliation amd the gain..

And then the other part that is merely in disbelief of it all.

New softness and seeking a life long love is such a feeling...

Really. To land safely in love with a feeder would be utilmately the worst and best case scenario..

I could see me expanding after each small encounter..small habit changes and then bigger pant sizes...



Stop daydreaming I tell myself...

Get up and fucking turn the meeting off...

Go get a quick snack before bed.


Of course... I get cuddled up to a snack and the website again

The comfort of it all.

Diary, I find it so flucking funny to be so entranced my the seditious act of eating and eroticism.

... like wtf is this existence about anyway.


Let's weight and find out. 😘

Maybe I get so fat I lay out like a cow waiting for my feeder and breeder..

Maybe I quit my job and become a slave to my lover..

Maybe I find peace posting all my clothes getting too small, the scale changes and measurements.

Exercise is great
I love how I feel when I do it... but eating... that's an addiction I am not yet in recovery from .

I don't know if I am ready for that yet.

Who knows...

Whatever

I need a snack and to rub my belly until this throbbing goes away.

Ah this fatty needs a good pounding.