chapter 1

Gail had always been a bit of a loner. She had never really fit in with other girls who liked talking about boys, fashion and pop music. Nor did she want to join the boys playing football between goalposts made up of bags and coats. She didn’t feel lonely, however, because she was able to sit quietly and enter another realm. A realm where anything was possible and nothing was impossible. It was filled with faeries, angels and other mythical creatures. In that realm, she could fly and look down on the real world below or she could swim into the depths of the ocean as easily as if she was a mermaid. She could visit ancient cities in seconds or talk to the animals. It was a world of vivid colours and magic. And it all lay in the confines of her own head.
She had always been very slim because she would often imagine she was sitting astride a beautiful palomino horse. She ran all over the local streets, industrial estates and patches of waste ground, but in her mind she was galloping on her horse over lush pasture. Every curb or twig on the ground was a fence that she could jump over, challenging her horse to try more difficult obstacles.
She thought everyone saw the world as she did.
If she wanted, she could summon the spirit of a dead relative to her side for comfort and to protect her. She would see their lips move, but could never understand what they said. It didn’t matter. It was just nice to know they were there.
They supported her no matter what.
When she grew older, she got a Saturday job as a waitress in a local hotel. It was good to have money in her pocket. She spent the majority of it on clothes and accessories. She did not want to wear the latest fashions, nor did she want to wear glamorous vintage. She was no posh spice. Nor was she a sporty, scary, ginger, or baby spice. She was more of an anti-spice or anti-fashion.
She wore flowing Indian cotton with rich crushed velvet and jeans whenever she was out of uniform. She wore boots when others wore shoes. She loved to wear jewellery, but she was not obsessed with pandora bracelet charms. She liked to wear ancient symbols or crystals. Odd earrings was a favourite. For example an earring with a sun symbol in her right ear and an earring with a moon symbol in her left ear. She might wear one short earring and one very long earring that almost touched her shoulder.
When other girls spent hours on their make up contouring and highlighting, she went fresh faced with a hint of eyeliner and blusher. Her evening look added lipstick.

Of course, she got teased and ostracised for being different, but it did not matter. She was not like them anyway. She did not want to be in their cliques. She just wanted to get on, finish her schoolwork and exams so that she could leave school and get on with the rest of her life.
She was not bothered about going to the school prom, so not having a prom dress was not an issue.
Her mother urged her to reconsider, but Gail knew she would never regret it. She was not going to follow the same path as everyone else, so what difference did it make?
Even her own mother did not understand her. Teenagers should be listening to pop music, or (God forbid) the louder rock stuff. Instead she would spend hours listening to South American pan pipes or Tibetan chanting. Her mother was worried about her daughter. She was changing quickly and becoming more weird. She suspected her daughter might be taking drugs. That would account for the strange smells emanating from her room. Gail assured her she was taking nothing she shouldn’t be taking. The statement made no difference to how her mother felt. Maybe the incense and essential oils she burned was to disguise the smell of something else.
Her mother did not understand why her daughter would sit cross legged on little more than a cushion with her Tibetan chanting playing. She would surround herself with stones of different colours, burn incense and God only known what else. She could sit there for hours in a trance like state. Gail said it was meditation. Her mother was convinced it was drugs.
Young girls should be going out, getting drunk and having underage sex, not sitting meditating in their room for hours with weird smells and objects around them.
When she left home, at eighteen to go to university, her mother clung to a hope that she might learn to conform. Why oh why had she given birth to a living and breathing hippie?