chapter one

He was finally nearing the end...school was almost over. Becoming a school teacher was now on the horizon, he just needed to finish student teaching. The pandemic didn't have much effect on his waistline as it did most other people, he was still working his retail job; constantly walking to and from. At last, he could go part-time. "New year, new clothes, new me!" he would say. Boy was he right...

Student teaching began and it was quite stressful to his surprise. Constantly drafting lessons, putting in extra time with students, and sitting at the piano practicing left him little to no time to cook a meal! He would buy veggies and lean meats, but they would just go bad from sitting in the fridge untouched. What a waste...

"Fuck it," he said, "there's no point to buying fresh food anymore...frozen it is!" He always tried to get the best deal at the store, and when he arrived at the market that day nothing was on sale. Out of nowhere, a little yellow sticker caught his eye...

"Pizza Rolls 90 count, 5 for $10." What a catch! "Are they trying to make me fat!" he said to himself. "Well, too good a deal to pass up!"

With a busier week than usual coming up ahead, and no time to get back to the store, he bought all 10!

It was pizza rolls every night for him for the next 2 weeks.

"I'll keep it to 25 at a time, that'll keep me thin."

For a while, he stayed true to his commitment, but the stress was really setting in. He took an open bag out of the freezer.

"Hmm...35 left. What the hell."

35 this one time wouldn't hurt, right? Of course not. What happened next he didn't anticipate...

He sat down with his new favorite dinner, went to reach for the first bite, and stopped abruptly.

"Wait, I'm looking a little round right now...I better weigh myself."

When he took off his shirt he was genuinely surprised.

"Wow...I must be bloated, that's all. I've been good! I've only been eating 25 at a time!"

He stepped on the scale, remembering that last time he weighed himself, he was a trim 160.

"What!" he exclaimed,

"170?! No way!! I guess the pizza rolls have been catching with me..."

Then he remembered the doughnuts during his breaks from class, the 2Ls of soda he bought to save some cash at the store, and the Five Guys he would get to celebrate the weekend on Friday nights.

"I've got to make a change..."

He still had those 35 pizza rolls waiting for him downstairs, and he was starving (despite the constant snacking that day).

"Might as well eat them, I can start my diet tomorrow...tomorrow for sure!"

We all know how those New Year's Resolutions never seem to work out.

The next day was Friday, a.k.a., Five Guys. That was his ritual! His victory celebration!

"Ehh, tomorrow is fine right? I mean, it's not even February yet!"

They say tomorrow never comes when putting off responsibilities, but it definitely doesn't when you're putting on weight.

He did is normal snacking during the day, but as long as he cut out those pizza rolls late at night, he was sure he was good.

Then he remembered,

"I still have 4 bags of pizza rolls left!"

They couldn't just go to waste. He made his humble 25 in the oven and waited patiently. Those pizza rolls were delicious as always, but something was different this time...they were all gone, but he was still hungry. Unable to help himself, he popped in an extra 15. He was good and productive that day, not physically, but hey, he deserved it in his mind.

"The more I eat, the quicker they'll be gone, and the quicker I'll get to this diet!"

25 never seemed to satisfy his hunger after that day...so it became 35. Sure enough, he ran out sooner rather than later, but now he was out of food. Another trip to the store he took.

This time he saw a beautiful woman working there that he had never seen before.

"She must be new...I really gotta drop this weight so I can get a girl like that!"

As he stared, she caught his eye.

"Oh my god, here she comes! I gotta suck in this gut!"

"Hello," she said simply.

"Hi," he said in return.

"Need help shopping? I know exactly what's on sale!"

"That would be great, thank you!"

They walked, they talked, and then they took a right down the frozen food aisle...

"Pizza Rolls are 6 for $10 this week, even better than last sale!"

"Play it cool, play it cool, don't give up the fact that you're on a diet," he thought to himself.

"Sounds great!" he said with an anxious grin.

"Only 6 bags??" she muttered, "these are the last 12 bags, get em while they're hot! Or I guess cold!" she said with a smirk and a giggle.

How could he say no?

Here he was, a freezer full of those delicious pizza rolls which now seemed to take less room up in his belly.

"The hell with it...she liked me!"

He put 45 in this time, his stomach was gurgling, pleading for a real meal.

45 really filled him up, but again, something was different. As his stomach became slightly more distended than the night before, he felt...turned on. He couldn't explain it, he started eating faster and faster. He grabbed a 2L of Pepsi and went bottom's up.
He had never felt this way before...

Needless to say, that diet went out the window. He now had 12 whopping bags to consume...and he was excited to do it. 45 turned 50 after a couple of days, 50 to 55, and 55 to, well, you get the picture. 12 bags amounts to 980 rolls...they were gone in 2 weeks. At 6pm he would make 60, and then make 20 more 5 hours later. He was insatiable. As he opened the fridge to crack that last bag, he remembered that beautiful girl from the market. No more food meant he could see her again! He ate a whole bag that night.

Now he was imagining her whispering in his ear,

"...just one more..,"

as she raised her hand high to come down on his gut with a "SMACK!"

He had fallen asleep on the couch and the empty plate had fell off the coffee table.

"I must have been dreaming...I must have fallen asleep while gorging myself..."

He looked down at his swollen stomach...he loved it. When he slapped it, it wobbled back and forth slightly. He was surprised by this.

"Did I get fatter? Wait...of course I did! I've been eating like an absolute pig!"

He didn't bother to weigh himself, he had business to tend to. Winter break was now upon him. Hunger was now upon him; he made for the store.

As he walked through those fateful doors, there she was, in all her beauty! They locked eyes again like they did that very first day. She came rushing over.

"Out of those pizza rolls again?!"

"Why yes I am," he replied.

"Wow, you must have quite the appetite..."

A subtle grin came over her face, a glimmer sparked in her eye.

"They aren't on sale this week, unfortunately."

The grin fell from her face.

"What can you do? Next time maybe I'll get lucky."

There was a silence...

"They're on me this time!" She said suddenly.

"Wait, what? No, that's ok, really."

"I insist!"

He thought to himself,

"She must see how fat I'm getting...God knows I don't need any more pizza rolls, can't she tell?"

He finally responded,

"It's ok! really! It's pretty obvious I can make it without those things for a while!" clearly referencing his growing gut and his shrinking shirt.

They both chuckled.

With every breath he took in, his belly would lift up into his chest. When that laugh came out, and gravity brought it back down, well, it jiggled like jello.

She bit her lip...

She took a deep breath...

She was staring so intensely at the round mass beginning to form in the center of his body.

As if a chill came over her, she snapped back to reality.

"Oh...I insist..." she murmured.

"Well," he responded, "How many should I take home today?"

He became rock hard, just anticipating her response.

She became stern, forceful, commanding.

"We only have 10 bags today, but if that isn't enough, doughnuts are on sale this week...3 boxes for $5," she said as a devilish grin came over her face.

He couldn't help himself as he said,

"Wow...that's a lot of fat and carbs...you think I could eat all that?"

"I would hope so..." she said without hesitation.

"Well, I wouldn't want to disappoint you..."

"Then don't."

He got a chill down his spine.

They walked out together, exchanging numbers before she turned towards the other side of the parking lot.

"Wait! I don't mean to assume, but...I thought you were coming with me?"

"Oh, someday I will...I just think you need to stretch that gut out some more before you can handle what I'll do to you."

He just smiled.

As they went their separate ways, he heard her voice again...

"Hey!"

He turned.

"I don't want to wait another 2 weeks to see you, I want your fridge empty in a week. Eat up."

He grinned and thought to himself, "Damn...she is something else..."