"That buffet was amazing! We should definitely come here again soon. Let's go to that milkshake bar for dessert."

"I can't."

"Sure you can - I've seen you eat more than that, and we still have time."

"I mean I can't physically go - I've been stuck in this booth since you went to refill my plate the second time."

"Oh... Well, we'll just have to stay here and check out their dessert options then."

Just ordered takeaway, even though I shouldn't really splurge on such luxuries 😅 It's been a long week, and I can't be bothered cooking... I have no idea how I'm gonna muster the energy to roll out of bed, put on a muumuu, or whatever item of clothing us closest, to answer the door when the food arrives - I need an assistant 😂

My parents got a new car recently, and the seatbelt in the front seat is a lot shorter than the ones in the back, and compared to their old car 😅 Sure, I've gotten fatter, but it's a noticeable difference. Literally can't buckle it when I'm stuffed 🫣

Ugh - just came home from a very long day of too much standing and walking, and now I can't get my sock off 😫 I usually just step on the toe of each one and wriggle them off, but the right one isn't budging, and I'm too sore to find an angle where I can reach it, since bending over isn't an option 😤 Send help! 🆘️

I'm planning to recreate my profile picture again, and just bought some extra long brushes and more paint 😂 Hope it's enough to reach and cover my whole belly 🙈