Chapter 5

When Sarah finally made it to the mall, she immediately went to the food court. Walking three and a half blocks had worked up an appetite on the brand new fatty. Despite her fridge raid earlier in the day, Sarah had already convinced herself it was time to eat again. Fast food wasn't something Sarah had ever partaken in. Still, today was going to be the day she'd let herself indulge. Being enticed by the smells of Burger King, Sarah let her ravenous hunger do the talking as she ordered.

Sarah tried to find a spot to sit down with food in hand. But, unfortunately, the first table she tried didn't have any chairs that she could fit into, finding out that any chair with armrests barred her ass from sitting down. Making that first mistake made Sarah think about something she'd never had to consider before. As she looked around for a seat, Sarah had to calculate if her ass would fit in a chair and if that chair would support her weight. Eventually, Sarah found a metal chair without armrests that she could plop down into. Though it wasn't a particularly wide chair, it was the best she could find. It felt unnatural that both of her asscheeks sagged over each side of the chair, overfilling the seat with her fat ass. However, Sarah spared all of this little thought as the food smells from her fast-food bag made her salivate.

The first bite was a religious experience, while each bite following the first spurred Sarah forward. She ate as if someone was about to come over at any minute and take her food away, shoveling it in her face with eagerness. While she ate, Sarah reached under the table and gave her belly a rub, loving the strained feeling the food was putting on it. Though Sarah was starting to feel full, she didn't stop, pushing herself to finish everything in front of her. Her concentration was broken only for a moment as some college-aged girls giggled and pointed at Sarah, who was making a spectacle of herself. Though Sarah hunched forward in an attempt to shield herself from the cruel laughter, she kept eating. To hide some of her shame, Sarah put some discarded hamburger wrappers littered on the table into the bag they came from and then hid it under the table while she finished the rest of the food. Though she was embarrassing herself with her public display of gluttony, Sarah couldn't help but feel aroused from the non-consensual ridicule. It was like she was being put in her place in the social pecking order, just for being fat. This type of public shame and arousal mixture was a new feeling and reluctantly welcomed.

Feeling like the fattest pig in the mall, Sarah finished the last of her food and leaned back in her chair. A burp slipped out, which caused Sarah only a brief moment of indignity. Sparing a few looks around, most people weren't paying her any mind, yet a few were staring, and the looks on their faces communicated everything they needed to say to Sarah. These weren't looks Sarah had ever gotten before. Having always had the body of a bikini model, Sarah was used to people admiring her slim figure or even sexualizing her assets. However, the looks she was getting in the food court were far from the lustful glances she was used to. Instead, these were looks of utter disgust. Even though Sarah found the situation intensely arousing, she couldn't help but feel guilty about the judgment a few strangers were passing on her. Despite the body being temporary, Sarah felt like a bit of an outcast in it. Sarah hurriedly tried to clean up the rest of her food wrappers before more people saw what she'd just done. If this was the way she was reacting after being in public for less than an hour, she couldn't imagine having to live out life being Freia's size. Frankly, Sarah didn't know how Freia even put up with it.

Dealing with the new societal pressure around being a fat girl out in public, Sarah arose unsteadily, almost clumsily falling back into her seat. She'd never eaten so much food in her entire life, and though she was barely aware of her new center of gravity, the stuffed nature of her belly threw everything off again. A few uneasy steps allowed Sarah to regain her composure, realizing a few more eyes were on her. The awareness that people weren't paying attention to her because she was attractive to them made Sarah feel awkward. A warm feeling on the back of her neck rose as Sarah felt more insecure about her body than ever before. Though she wanted this experience, she didn't feel as mentally prepared as she had hoped.

Sarah wanted to disappear as quickly as possible, walking out of the food court. However, every time Sarah heard someone laugh, she immediately felt like they were laughing at her, whether true or not. Those two girls that had pointed and laughed at her while she was eating had gotten in her head. Sarah had avoided bullying of any kind for her entire life, and now that she was getting a taste of it, she didn't feel emotionally equipped to handle it.

Around when Sarah was further in the mall, she felt a draft on some exposed skin around her middle. Reaching a hand down, Sarah realized her belly was hanging out the bottom of her sweatshirt. Back in her bedroom, Sarah hadn't minded the fantasy of being out in public looking like this. Yet now that she was under the eye of public scrutiny, Sarah's attitude was quickly changing. The discovery was mortifying as Sarah tried not to think about how many people had seen her belly out.

Nervous and embarrassed, Sarah waddled to the nearest bathroom she could find. Once inside, she hid in the large handicap stall while trying to fix her wardrobe issue. Like Freia had suggested, Sarah pulled the waistband of her panties up over her belly, followed by the waistband of her stretch pants. Doing so seemed to alleviate the shame of walking around with her belly out. Unfortunately, though the change drew less attention to her exposed stomach, there was still a significant bulge of lower belly fat pressing against her stretch pants, giving off the unfortunate fat girl gunt look.

While her confidence had waned a bit, Sarah took some deep breathes and tried to focus on getting back to enjoying the experience again. She'd gotten so caught up in what other people were thinking about her that she'd almost tucked tail and gone home to hide. However, this day was what she'd been fantasizing about for years of her life, and she wasn't going to let a few dirty looks from strangers ruin that. Invigorated, Sarah walked out of the bathroom and into the mall. She needed something cute and lacy for when her boyfriend came over later.

The moment Sarah entered Torrid, she felt relaxed. Inside, fat girls everywhere looked just like her, so the fear of judgment all but evaporated. Like a kid in a candy shop, Sarah giddily headed straight for the lingerie, very motivated to replace the disappointing K-Mart Bra and panty set Freia had loaned her. After nearly an hour of trying on clothes, Sarah happily settled on a provocative set she liked. A mesh black babydoll with open curtains that her belly generously pushed through, some black thigh-high stockings, and a black G-string that was a size or two too small in the best way possible. Sarah had spent nearly fifteen minutes in the dressing room admiring herself in that lingerie set, taking pictures of herself and getting worked up wondering how her boyfriend would react later.

While Sarah was most excited about her first plus-size lingerie purchase, she also got a pink bodycon dress with white stripes that hugged every inch of her and a jean jacket to wear over it. Wearing her new dress out of the store, Sarah was all smiles again, having forgotten about her insecurities earlier in her mall trip altogether. The little shopping adventure as a big girl had turned Sarah's attitude back around. Even though there was still a nagging bit of hesitancy from some of the looks she got, Sarah was getting better about not thinking about it. Sarah even had the conviction to grab a Cinnabon as she headed for the exit.

On her way out of the mall, Sarah got a tremendous boost of confidence when she noticed two guys checking her out. The somewhat handsome guys walking into the mall had looked at her the way she'd always been admired. However, the fact that she was getting those types of looks in the body she was in got Sarah very hot and bothered. If she didn't have a boyfriend, she'd have gone over to introduce herself and see if those lustful looks translated into a potential one-night stand. But, instead, Sarah was sure to add a little extra wiggle to her walk just to tease them. Sarah was very aware that fat admirers and feeders existed and liked bigger girls. However, she was aware that they were a niche bunch that wasn't easy to find.

Unwilling to even try to walk home, Sarah hopped in a Uber and headed back to her apartment as the sun started to set. The rocky outing hadn't been everything she'd expected it to be, but Sarah was glad it ended on a positive note. However, the best part of the night was yet to come.